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Always I have been guided gently by God in how and where I would be in ministry and career. I learned to trust God's guidance and movement in my life. In 1987, I took the position of coordinator of the spiritual growth programs for the Ewens Center at Mount Mary College in Milwaukee. The ministry of working with women in the various aspects of their spiritual lives was one dear to my heart. My life was enriched right along with theirs while I spent fifteen years listening, counseling, and providing informational, inspirational, and experiential classes for them. As I grew older and realized that semi-retirement was probably in my near future, I knew that I would leave Mount Mary and keep helping only my private clientele out of my home office.

But when? The question often came to my mind, and I firmly believed that God would again be present and direct me when the time was right.

Never did I expect it to happen as it did. In January of 2002, I went with some faculty and students on a four-day solitude retreat at Baileys Harbor, Wisconsin. Coming away from there, I felt deeply content and full of inspiration for starting the second semester. One week later, on Thursday, January 24, I awoke about ten minutes earlier than usual and lay quietly in my bed, offering my day to God. It happened then! As clear as could be, I heard in my mind and heart, "Gina, it's time to leave Mount Mary." I couldn't believe it and thought it must be some figment of my imagination. I arose, did my morning exercises, showered, and prayed. I thought the idea would leave. It didn't! The gentle, but direct message stayed in my face for the next four days. Finally, I confided in my two companion SSND sisters living with me. They said, "Sounds like you need to look at that."

I prayed over it and started the process for termination. As I did my work and met with people, I found myself relishing my experience and saying, "Do I really want to part with this?" Gradually, I could say, "With God's grace, I think I can let go." I left Mount Mary on June 7 with much peace in my heart, knowing that, once again, God had moved me gently and firmly. If not, I would probably still be at Mount Mary, not knowing when to stop. Yes, I trust God's messages for my future even when they come in strange ways.

Janet Beltman

The afternoon of the third Sunday in January, 1977, was a cloudy, dreary day, but it is a day I will never forget. It had been two years since my father's death, a time during which I had often felt sad and alone. Having just returned from church, I began preparing my dinner.

I was standing at the stove, with my back to the window, enveloped in the gloom of the day and my loneliness, when I became aware of a brightness in the kitchen. My first thought was that the sun had finally broken through the clouds. I turned to look outside. The dreariness had not changed, but the brightness continued to increase inside my kitchen until the entire room was filled with a brilliant yellow light. A warm, tingling sensation then began penetrating the top of my head and slowly traveled down through my body. As it exited through my fingertips and toes, the brightness in the room began to fade away. When the sensation completely left my body, the room had returned to its former dreariness.

I felt frightened at first. What had just happened to me? But then I remembered the warmth and comfort that had flowed through me with the light, and I realized that God had sent the Holy Spirit to assure me, in the midst of my gloom, that I am never alone.

God's peace and presence is a blessing. God is good.