Holy Ground
Drama
The Bee Attitudes
And 5 More Extraordinary Plays for Ordinary Days
Object:
Cast
Sunday School Teacher
Sunday School Students:
Chris
Wilson
Zed
Dusty
Astrid
Pat
Melody
Bailey
Banyon
Fritz
The Angel Fun
Grandma
Dale
Hungry Person (nonspeaking)
Props
Bible
Music (loud, through speakers)
Tin sheet, pots and pans (to simulate thunder)
Siren
Light
Angel costumes
Bed or cot
School chair
Paper
Table and chair
Bowl
Food
Clothing
Sunday School Teacher: Class! Class! Welcome. Welcome to Sunday school. This is my first week as your teacher. Actually, it's my first week as anyone's teacher, but since no one else wanted to volunteer, well, it's me.
Chris: Another high-quality teacher thrown to the wolves.
Sunday School Teacher: I hope not. Anyway, today's lesson is from Exodus, chapter 3, about holy ground. Does anyone have a Bible with them?
Wilson: A Bible, what's that?
(laughter)
Zed: Holy ground, what's that?
Dusty: My dad says holy ground is Ketchup Stadium in Pittsburgh.
Wilson: That's Heinz Stadium.
Dusty: I don't care if it's Heinz or Ketchup or V-8 Juice Stadium, on Sundays during the football season my dad stays home from church so he won't miss anything, and all during the game he says a lot of "thees and thous" like out of the Bible, and a couple of "holy moleys."
Zed: So that's holy ground?
Sunday School Teacher: No, no, no. Holy ground is the term that was used when a voice spoke from the burning bush. Moses was told to take off his shoes because he was standing on holy ground.
Astrid: Take his shoes off? I hope he was wearing those gellin' things so his feet aren't smellin'.
Pat: They didn't wear shoes in those days. They wore sandals.
Astrid: But the teacher said "shoes." Who's got a Bible? What does the Bible say?
Sunday School Teacher: Yes, someone get a Bible and look it up. And discuss it please. The pastor sent around a note saying he wanted to meet with the teachers for a couple of minutes. I won't take long.
Dusty: It'll take long enough. Look, can I be the substitute teacher while you're gone? I'm the one with a Bible.
Sunday School Teacher: Well, you can read the Bible anyway -- Exodus 3:4-5 -- and talk about holy ground. When I come back I want you to tell me the definition of holy ground. (exits)
Melody: Oh, great, definitions. The next thing you know, we'll have to diagram a sentence.
Bailey: Somebody read the passage. Exodus 3:4 and 5, I think.
Pat: What page is it on?
Melody: I found it! Here. (reads haltingly) "And when the Lord saw that he turned aside to see God called unto him out of the midst of the bush, and said, 'Moses, Moses.' And he said, 'Here am I.' And he said, 'Draw not nigh hither: put off thy shoes from off thy feet, for the place whereon thou standest is holy ground.' " See! Shoes, not sandals. It's in the Bible.
Zed: My Bible says sandals. Your Bible is wrong.
Melody: My Bible is not wrong. This is my grandmother's Bible. Are you saying my grandmother is wrong?
Zed: Let me see that. No look, it doesn't have your grandmother's name on it. It belongs to King James. And what does some king know about the Bible?
Wilson: Forget the shoes. Think about it. A bush that is burning, and a voice speaking out of it! God's voice! That would be exciting.
Banyon: Talk about your special effects!
Wilson: That's just what I was thinking. I'll bet you have to get some sort of special coating so the bush doesn't burn up. And then you could put a speaker so the voice comes out of it. And music. Big music! Loud music.
Astrid: Yeah, but that's not what the teacher wants us to talk about. She wants to talk about real burning bushes, and real holy ground. And God talking out of the bush.
Melody: And I still want to know if it's shoes or sandals. It's important.
Pat: Why is it so important?
Melody: I've got a closet full of shoes and sandals, and believe me, there's a difference.
Fritz: We need an expert. A real expert to tell us all about this story from the Bible.
(A burst of lightning and thunder -- noise provided by tin sheet, pots and pans, siren, light -- in the midst of this The Angel Fun arrives.)
Zed: Are you...?
The Angel Fun: Am I -- who?
Zed: You know, the burning bush and all that, are you --
The Angel Fun: (laughs) Hardly! But I do have that effect on people. I'm an angel. Just an angel. Another servant of the Almighty, just like you.
Banyon: A servant just like us?
The Angel Fun: Okay, you don't have the bells and whistles, and you can't fly at the speed of light, nor can you circle the planet Jupiter one second and then whiz down and save a butterfly from an onrushing Mac Truck the next, but if you discount all of those things ... (shrugs)
Melody: Sure. Yeah. Just like us.
Bailey: So.
The Angel Fun: So?
Bailey: So, why are you here?
The Angel Fun: You mean, I have to have a reason to just be somewhere?
Chris: Well, yeah. I mean, angels don't just appear out of the blue for no particular reason, do they?
The Angel Fun: Oh, really? And what makes you the expert on angels?
Chris: Well, nothing really. I just thought ...
The Angel Fun: Never mind. It turns out that you're right. I'm an angel, and I'm here for a reason. I'm here to take you to holy ground, just like you wanted.
Pat: Holy ground! You mean, like burning bushes and booming voices. That's pretty scary.
The Angel Fun: What I've got in mind is a lot scarier, but don't worry. You can handle it.
Dusty: Let's go!
Fritz: Just like that? Let's go.
Dusty: Sure. I thought it might be out of this world.
Fritz: Really? And how exactly would we "go" as you put it.
Dusty: Maybe like they do in A Christmas Carol, where Scrooge touches the hem of the Ghost of Christmas Past and they fly through the air and stuff.
Fritz: Which Christmas carol? There must be a million of them.
Dusty: Who cares? They're all alike. There's three ghosts and one of them is very frightening. Four ghosts if you count Marley, and --
The Angel Fun: Excuse me. I'm here. Why don't you ask me? And by the way, don't believe what you see on TV. Keep your hands off the hem. These are angel garments, and when it comes time for the cleaning bill there's heaven to pay.
Chris: So how will you take us to see the holy ground?
The Angel Fun: Walk.
Chris: Walk? What's that?
The Angel Fun: It's what you do with those feet that are sticking on the end of your legs.
Wilson: Why do we have to walk? Why can't we have some kind magic or pixie dust or something?
The Angel Fun: Two reasons. First of all, this is the Bible we're talking about, not Peter Pan. And second, you guys don't get enough physical education in high school. When I was your age --
Astrid: Not that!
The Angel Fun: When I was your age I had to walk everywhere, 250 million light years to the nearest galaxy --
Astrid: I know, I know, uphill both ways in the middle of a black hole with meteors raining down on you.
The Angel Fun: How'd you know?
Dusty: One last question. What's your name?
The Angel Fun: My name?
Dusty: Every angel has a name. What's yours?
The Angel Fun: Oh, I suppose it won't hurt you to know. Fun.
Dusty: Fun?
The Angel Fun: That's my name. Fun. I'm the Angel Fun.
Dusty: That's an odd name for an angel. I thought angel names ended in el, the name for God. Like Gabriel, Michael, Raphael ...
The Angel Fun: You're right. But Fun-El sounded a little Fun-knee, and I got tired of the other angels talking about me being a funnel for information, a funnel for starlight, a funnel for, okay, you see. So I shortened it to Fun. Any other questions? Now let's go. Hold tight.
(A flash of light and thunder. A bed is brought on stage, with a person lying down, quiet and asleep.)
Banyon: Cool! The other side of the galaxy. So this is what the aliens look like. Kind of like an old person sleeping in a bed.
Chris: What are you talking about? This isn't the other side of the galaxy. This is an old person sleeping in a bed. Where are we?
The Angel Fun: At least one of you knows. Or should know.
Pat: I know. Or think I know. This is the nursing home. And that's my grandmother there, sleeping. Don't make so much noise, guys. You might wake her up.
The Angel Fun: Don't worry. No one can hear you right now, or you'd be escorted out in a heartbeat.
Melody: So where's the holy ground? Maybe it's under the bed. Or behind the drapes!
The Angel Fun: Not quite, but this is holy ground and there is a treasure here. Tell me, Pat, why don't you come here to visit your grandmother?
Pat: It's depressing. (pauses) Well, this place is full of old people. They can't do anything, and Grandma sleeps a lot. When she wakes up she cries, or asks me questions I don't understand. And I feel bad when I come and guilty when I don't come. It's no fun.
The Angel Fun: That's my name, don't wear it out.
Pat: It's embarrassing.
Wilson: So how can this be holy ground?
The Angel Fun: You want me to give you all the answers? You're all pretty smart. You tell me.
Chris: Maybe she used to be somebody.
The Angel Fun: She still is somebody! On earth all you see is this very tired, very good person! But this is someone who has done great things all her life. And right now, whenever she wakes up, even a little, she's praying for somebody. She's praying for some of you right now. Do you know what a difference that makes?
Zed: Not really. How can it make a difference?
The Angel Fun: Remember the time you were out on your bike and were nearly hit by a truck?
Zed: That was scary. I was just little then. Good thing I was able to speed up just enough.
The Angel Fun: It's a good thing she was praying for you that day. She was remembering you in her prayers, asking for special blessings for you.
Zed: I thought it was me who drove my bike faster.
The Angel Fun: You thought.
Zed: But why would she pray for me? I don't know her. She doesn't know me.
The Angel Fun: Don't you remember those cookies you especially loved at After School Club over at the church? Who do you think baked them? Angels? And she always remembered the way you'd take two or three, and always went for them first.
Chris: So this is holy ground?
The Angel Fun: The holiest. When Satan sees people like your grandmothers coming, he's running. They look weak, but they are very powerful. They've been working their spiritual muscles all their lives long.
Pat: So, you're saying I should visit here more often? But what about the rest of the class?
Astrid: Let's visit my grandmother. She's a lot more fun. Mine lives at our home and still makes cookies. She's cool.
The Angel Fun: Yes, your whole class could visit your grandmother. But you could also all get involved at the nursing home. Your whole class could go and sing songs there. You could bring treats. You could adopt residents and write letters.
Fritz: That's a great idea. We could come here once a year and really make a difference!
The Angel Fun: Once a year?
Fritz: Okay, maybe once a month. To start out. And then we'll see.
(Grandma stirs in bed, and sits up. She does not see anyone, except the Angel.)
Grandma: Oh. Oh, have I been sleeping again? The more I sleep, the less time to pray for people I love.
The Angel Fun: And who do you love?
Grandma: (turns slowly in bed) Oh, you again. Are you here to come get me?
The Angel Fun: Not yet. But someday.
Grandma: Whenever the Lord is ready. And you ask who I love? I love everybody, or at least I try to. Some people aren't easy to love, but that makes me pray harder. What else do I have left, but love and prayer?
The Angel Fun: What else is there? How is your family?
Grandma: They seem well, when I see them. Of course, they're always in a rush. They come later than they say they will, and they stay less then they promise, but I don't hold them to their promises. I remember what it was like when life seemed all a rush and there wasn't time for anything.
Pat: Hey, Grandma, I'm here! Over here!
Melody: I don't think she can hear you.
Grandma: Life's not easy here, but there are plenty of folks who have it worse. And it seems like I see you folks more and more often which is a good sign.
The Angel Fun: It's a very good sign. Now go back to sleep. You'll need your rest.
Grandma: Any particular reason?
The Angel Fun: I don't know. Maybe you'll be getting some visitors soon.
Grandma: (laughs) Not very likely. But it's a nice thought.
The Angel Fun: We'll see.
(Grandma goes back to sleep.)
Astrid: So this is holy ground? Well, it's certainly another world. It's not like holy ground is anywhere near where we live.
The Angel Fun: Don't be too sure.
(More noise and lights. The bed is taken out and replaced with a single school chair, with Dale, a student, sitting there alone.)
Dale: (begins to fold a paper airplane) Hey, bay-bee, hey, bay-bee. (talks to people the others can't see) Hey, is that supposed to be your nose? I thought it was Mount Rushmore. I thought it was the ski joint. Hey, you're ugly and your mother dresses you funny. Laugh, why don't ya? Don't you know what's funny?
Banyon: Whoah, that's Dale, at the school. This isn't holy ground. This is just the opposite of holy ground.
Wilson: You aren't kidding. I remember when I broke my arm. He said stupid stuff for weeks, inventing different ways he thought I broke it. I can't even repeat any of them.
Bailey: Maybe this is unholy ground, and there's going to be an army of angels coming to cleanse this place. Stand back. There's going to be some fireworks in a minute! (laughs)
Pat: That's right! Stand back! You ain't see nothing yet!
Dale: Hey, Bay-bee! I'm talking to you. Hey, Bay-bee! Who cut your hair? It looks terrible. How come your shirt has a pocket? What's in the pocket? Diamonds? Pencils? Is that a plastic pencil protector? Or a lead-lined radioactive pencil protector? Hey. Bay-bee! I'm talking to you.
Astrid: So when do the fireworks start?
The Angel Fun: I'm not laughing.
Melody: Well, you might as well start laughing, because he won't stop, whether you laugh or not.
The Angel Fun: Folks, you're standing on holy ground. Take off your shoes.
Dusty: Look out! Here come the rest of the angels to finish him off. (pauses) Honest. (pauses) Okay, so there aren't any more angels. Why are we here? There's Dale, and we all hate him because he hates everyone. He's real hurtful. He knows how to hurt people.
Banyon: And his parents won't stop him. They say it's funny.
Bailey: And the teachers won't try anymore. They know it doesn't do any good. He doesn't care what they do to him.
The Angel Fun: Are you saying that here is the one person Jesus did not die for?
Chris: (pauses uncomfortably) No. But going to the nursing home is sounding better and better. When do we start?
The Angel Fun: Let me ask you a question. Have any of you ever invited Dale to your Sunday school class?
Astrid: Are you kidding? Church is the one place we can get away from him. He's at the football games, he's at the dances, and whenever I go to the store he's there, too, making fun of what we put into the grocery cart.
Dale: Cheerio! Hey, cheerio! What are you, English? Why you putting Cheerios in your basket? Why can't you just say, "Hello," like a normal person. Cheeeerio! Whooo, Whoooo! Here comes the Cheeeerio train!
Astrid: Are you sure he can't hear us?
The Angel Fun: (a little surprised) No, I'm not sure. But all the same, do you think he's ever been to any church. Any church? Ever?
Wilson: His parents don't go. I heard his grandmother took him once when he was a little kid but the grownups complained and after a while she stopped taking him.
The Angel Fun: Well, this is holy ground. It's also dangerous ground. I'd like to say that if you invite him to church it'll work out, but there are some things even angels don't know.
Zed: I'm liking this holy ground business less and less. I want to go back to that burning bush thing.
Wilson: Yeah. I'll take off my shoes any time.
Melody: Okay, okay. Let's suppose, just for the sake of argument, that we invite Dale to our Sunday school. What if he says, "No"? What if he comes and makes everyone miserable at church? What if he makes fun of people and they want to kick us out in addition to him?
The Angel Fun: What if? There are no guarantees, campers. That's the thing about heaven. All we ask is everything. Of course, that's all we offer as well.
Banyon: All right, all right. We get it. We'll draw straws and the loser -- I mean the winner -- will try to invite Dale to Sunday school.
The Angel Fun: Really try.
Banyon: Really try. But first we'll arrange those visits to the nursing home. They're starting to sound better and better.
Dusty: We'll take our youth choir there.
Zed: You've shown us holy ground close to home. How about something a little more exotic, a little more distant? The kind of thing you find in the Bible!
Chris: Something exciting!
The Angel Fun: Exotic? Exciting?
(There is another flash, more sound and lights. Dale's chair is taken away. A very quiet Hungry Person is sitting, hunched over, with an empty bowl in front. He/she is shivering, and barefoot.)
Zed: I guess we're near holy ground, because that person isn't wearing shoes or sandals.
Pat: Quiet. This looks serious.
Dusty: What's happening here?
(Hungry Person moans, and reaches, shaking for the bowl. He/she gazes into the bowl then moan and rolls over, shivering even more.)
Wilson: Hey! Hey! We're here to help.
Astrid: What's wrong? Tell us what's wrong?
Melody: There's no food in that bowl. That person is very hungry.
Bailey: It must be cold there. Look at that person shiver!
Wilson: We can help. Did anyone bring food to Sunday school?
Banyon: You know we're not supposed to bring food. It's not allowed.
Fritz: But we all do. Look, I've got some cupcakes.
Zed: And I've got some candy bars.
Chris: I don't need this sweater. I just wear it to church because I don't want to get my school clothes messy.
Dusty: I'm wearing thick socks. I'll give up my shoes.
Wilson: Hello! Hello! We're talking to you. We've got stuff for you!
Melody: Can you hear us?
(One by one, they toss the food and the clothing toward Hungry Person. The Angel catches the things.)
Astrid: Hey! We're trying to help.
Zed: Yeah. What are you doing?
The Angel Fun: You're seeing someone far off. You can't throw things there.
Astrid: But we want to help.
The Angel Fun: So do I.
Bailey: Then let's work together. We'll give you the stuff, and you fly at the speed of light and take them there.
The Angel Fun: I wish we could, but that's not how it works.
Dusty: What? What good is it being an angel if you can't do things?
The Angel Fun: I am an angel, it's good, and I'm doing things. I'm showing you. This is your world. There's nothing you can't do if you set your minds to it, including getting your help to people.
Zed: But how are we supposed to find out where this person is? How can we get the help there?
The Angel Fun: Are you telling me that with all your schooling, your computer skills, the internet, and 24-hours-a-day news you can't figure out where the hungry people are?
Wilson: But it costs money to send things. You could do it for free!
Chris: Why did you show us this when it wasn't possible to help?
The Angel Fun: Who says it's impossible?
Chris: We don't have any money.
The Angel Fun: Really?
Fritz: No, wait. This person here, that's someone who has no money. We've got money.
Chris: I don't ever have any money.
Wilson: You think? Add it up. Think of the money we spend on soda, on movies, on rentals, on just stuff. We've got money.
Bailey: This is not fair. We want to help.
The Angel Fun: It's not fair all right. Nothing about this world is fair, but God is good, and God is counting on you being good as well.
Banyon: We've got to find out where this person is. We've got to help.
The Angel Fun: I think we're getting somewhere. Guys, you've seen holy ground. It's all around you. It's down the street and around the world.
Wilson: The Bible Age isn't over, is it?
The Angel Fun: It's just beginning.
Fritz: Hey, wait! You're not going to leave that poor person alone, are you?
The Angel Fun: Hardly. No one is every abandoned. Ever. (kneels, takes the hand of Hungry Person, and puts a hand on his/her shoulder) Hold on. Help is coming. Uh, oh. I think I hear your teacher coming down the hall.
Banyon: You're not afraid of our teacher, are you?
The Angel Fun: Aren't I? Show a little respect. When you're around your Sunday school teacher you're also treading on holy ground. At least around the edge. See you.
(Boom, kaboom, and The Angel Fun is gone, along with Hungry Person. Sunday School Teacher walks in confidently, then stops suddenly, a little puzzled.)
Sunday School Teacher: There's something funny going on here.
Astrid: What do you mean?
Sunday School Teacher: I don't know. Nothing, I guess. Anyway, sorry to be away so long, but I'm sure you've had a good time without me. To tell you the truth, the pastor wanted to let us know something important, though I don't know if you'll be interested. It seems there's been a call for help through our denominational disaster relief for a particular country where the winter is coming on. People are freezing and they're starving, and they need help today, not tomorrow.
Bailey: Freezing? Starving, did you say?
Sunday School Teacher: That's right. They're a long way away, and there are plenty of clothes and food to ship to them, but with the economy in bad shape there isn't money to ship it, and it needs to go right now. They're asking for special donations, but some of the adult Sunday school classes say they've already helped. They said the youth ought to help. Honest, I didn't try to sign you up, but I said that at least I'd ask. Do you think you could --
Wilson: We could all go without soda for a week.
Zed: A month.
Pat: A year.
Chris: And I've got so much extra stuff I was thinking of holding a yard sale. I could donate the proceeds.
Astrid: We could all help.
Wilson: Count on us.
Sunday School Teacher: Well, this is a surprise. I was told that the youth didn't like to get involved. We can discuss this more at our evening youth meeting. Now tell me, what do you know about holy ground? Did you have time to open your Bibles?
(Students all raise their hands excitedly, saying, "Me, me, call on me!" Then all freeze and the play comes to an end.)
Sunday School Teacher
Sunday School Students:
Chris
Wilson
Zed
Dusty
Astrid
Pat
Melody
Bailey
Banyon
Fritz
The Angel Fun
Grandma
Dale
Hungry Person (nonspeaking)
Props
Bible
Music (loud, through speakers)
Tin sheet, pots and pans (to simulate thunder)
Siren
Light
Angel costumes
Bed or cot
School chair
Paper
Table and chair
Bowl
Food
Clothing
Sunday School Teacher: Class! Class! Welcome. Welcome to Sunday school. This is my first week as your teacher. Actually, it's my first week as anyone's teacher, but since no one else wanted to volunteer, well, it's me.
Chris: Another high-quality teacher thrown to the wolves.
Sunday School Teacher: I hope not. Anyway, today's lesson is from Exodus, chapter 3, about holy ground. Does anyone have a Bible with them?
Wilson: A Bible, what's that?
(laughter)
Zed: Holy ground, what's that?
Dusty: My dad says holy ground is Ketchup Stadium in Pittsburgh.
Wilson: That's Heinz Stadium.
Dusty: I don't care if it's Heinz or Ketchup or V-8 Juice Stadium, on Sundays during the football season my dad stays home from church so he won't miss anything, and all during the game he says a lot of "thees and thous" like out of the Bible, and a couple of "holy moleys."
Zed: So that's holy ground?
Sunday School Teacher: No, no, no. Holy ground is the term that was used when a voice spoke from the burning bush. Moses was told to take off his shoes because he was standing on holy ground.
Astrid: Take his shoes off? I hope he was wearing those gellin' things so his feet aren't smellin'.
Pat: They didn't wear shoes in those days. They wore sandals.
Astrid: But the teacher said "shoes." Who's got a Bible? What does the Bible say?
Sunday School Teacher: Yes, someone get a Bible and look it up. And discuss it please. The pastor sent around a note saying he wanted to meet with the teachers for a couple of minutes. I won't take long.
Dusty: It'll take long enough. Look, can I be the substitute teacher while you're gone? I'm the one with a Bible.
Sunday School Teacher: Well, you can read the Bible anyway -- Exodus 3:4-5 -- and talk about holy ground. When I come back I want you to tell me the definition of holy ground. (exits)
Melody: Oh, great, definitions. The next thing you know, we'll have to diagram a sentence.
Bailey: Somebody read the passage. Exodus 3:4 and 5, I think.
Pat: What page is it on?
Melody: I found it! Here. (reads haltingly) "And when the Lord saw that he turned aside to see God called unto him out of the midst of the bush, and said, 'Moses, Moses.' And he said, 'Here am I.' And he said, 'Draw not nigh hither: put off thy shoes from off thy feet, for the place whereon thou standest is holy ground.' " See! Shoes, not sandals. It's in the Bible.
Zed: My Bible says sandals. Your Bible is wrong.
Melody: My Bible is not wrong. This is my grandmother's Bible. Are you saying my grandmother is wrong?
Zed: Let me see that. No look, it doesn't have your grandmother's name on it. It belongs to King James. And what does some king know about the Bible?
Wilson: Forget the shoes. Think about it. A bush that is burning, and a voice speaking out of it! God's voice! That would be exciting.
Banyon: Talk about your special effects!
Wilson: That's just what I was thinking. I'll bet you have to get some sort of special coating so the bush doesn't burn up. And then you could put a speaker so the voice comes out of it. And music. Big music! Loud music.
Astrid: Yeah, but that's not what the teacher wants us to talk about. She wants to talk about real burning bushes, and real holy ground. And God talking out of the bush.
Melody: And I still want to know if it's shoes or sandals. It's important.
Pat: Why is it so important?
Melody: I've got a closet full of shoes and sandals, and believe me, there's a difference.
Fritz: We need an expert. A real expert to tell us all about this story from the Bible.
(A burst of lightning and thunder -- noise provided by tin sheet, pots and pans, siren, light -- in the midst of this The Angel Fun arrives.)
Zed: Are you...?
The Angel Fun: Am I -- who?
Zed: You know, the burning bush and all that, are you --
The Angel Fun: (laughs) Hardly! But I do have that effect on people. I'm an angel. Just an angel. Another servant of the Almighty, just like you.
Banyon: A servant just like us?
The Angel Fun: Okay, you don't have the bells and whistles, and you can't fly at the speed of light, nor can you circle the planet Jupiter one second and then whiz down and save a butterfly from an onrushing Mac Truck the next, but if you discount all of those things ... (shrugs)
Melody: Sure. Yeah. Just like us.
Bailey: So.
The Angel Fun: So?
Bailey: So, why are you here?
The Angel Fun: You mean, I have to have a reason to just be somewhere?
Chris: Well, yeah. I mean, angels don't just appear out of the blue for no particular reason, do they?
The Angel Fun: Oh, really? And what makes you the expert on angels?
Chris: Well, nothing really. I just thought ...
The Angel Fun: Never mind. It turns out that you're right. I'm an angel, and I'm here for a reason. I'm here to take you to holy ground, just like you wanted.
Pat: Holy ground! You mean, like burning bushes and booming voices. That's pretty scary.
The Angel Fun: What I've got in mind is a lot scarier, but don't worry. You can handle it.
Dusty: Let's go!
Fritz: Just like that? Let's go.
Dusty: Sure. I thought it might be out of this world.
Fritz: Really? And how exactly would we "go" as you put it.
Dusty: Maybe like they do in A Christmas Carol, where Scrooge touches the hem of the Ghost of Christmas Past and they fly through the air and stuff.
Fritz: Which Christmas carol? There must be a million of them.
Dusty: Who cares? They're all alike. There's three ghosts and one of them is very frightening. Four ghosts if you count Marley, and --
The Angel Fun: Excuse me. I'm here. Why don't you ask me? And by the way, don't believe what you see on TV. Keep your hands off the hem. These are angel garments, and when it comes time for the cleaning bill there's heaven to pay.
Chris: So how will you take us to see the holy ground?
The Angel Fun: Walk.
Chris: Walk? What's that?
The Angel Fun: It's what you do with those feet that are sticking on the end of your legs.
Wilson: Why do we have to walk? Why can't we have some kind magic or pixie dust or something?
The Angel Fun: Two reasons. First of all, this is the Bible we're talking about, not Peter Pan. And second, you guys don't get enough physical education in high school. When I was your age --
Astrid: Not that!
The Angel Fun: When I was your age I had to walk everywhere, 250 million light years to the nearest galaxy --
Astrid: I know, I know, uphill both ways in the middle of a black hole with meteors raining down on you.
The Angel Fun: How'd you know?
Dusty: One last question. What's your name?
The Angel Fun: My name?
Dusty: Every angel has a name. What's yours?
The Angel Fun: Oh, I suppose it won't hurt you to know. Fun.
Dusty: Fun?
The Angel Fun: That's my name. Fun. I'm the Angel Fun.
Dusty: That's an odd name for an angel. I thought angel names ended in el, the name for God. Like Gabriel, Michael, Raphael ...
The Angel Fun: You're right. But Fun-El sounded a little Fun-knee, and I got tired of the other angels talking about me being a funnel for information, a funnel for starlight, a funnel for, okay, you see. So I shortened it to Fun. Any other questions? Now let's go. Hold tight.
(A flash of light and thunder. A bed is brought on stage, with a person lying down, quiet and asleep.)
Banyon: Cool! The other side of the galaxy. So this is what the aliens look like. Kind of like an old person sleeping in a bed.
Chris: What are you talking about? This isn't the other side of the galaxy. This is an old person sleeping in a bed. Where are we?
The Angel Fun: At least one of you knows. Or should know.
Pat: I know. Or think I know. This is the nursing home. And that's my grandmother there, sleeping. Don't make so much noise, guys. You might wake her up.
The Angel Fun: Don't worry. No one can hear you right now, or you'd be escorted out in a heartbeat.
Melody: So where's the holy ground? Maybe it's under the bed. Or behind the drapes!
The Angel Fun: Not quite, but this is holy ground and there is a treasure here. Tell me, Pat, why don't you come here to visit your grandmother?
Pat: It's depressing. (pauses) Well, this place is full of old people. They can't do anything, and Grandma sleeps a lot. When she wakes up she cries, or asks me questions I don't understand. And I feel bad when I come and guilty when I don't come. It's no fun.
The Angel Fun: That's my name, don't wear it out.
Pat: It's embarrassing.
Wilson: So how can this be holy ground?
The Angel Fun: You want me to give you all the answers? You're all pretty smart. You tell me.
Chris: Maybe she used to be somebody.
The Angel Fun: She still is somebody! On earth all you see is this very tired, very good person! But this is someone who has done great things all her life. And right now, whenever she wakes up, even a little, she's praying for somebody. She's praying for some of you right now. Do you know what a difference that makes?
Zed: Not really. How can it make a difference?
The Angel Fun: Remember the time you were out on your bike and were nearly hit by a truck?
Zed: That was scary. I was just little then. Good thing I was able to speed up just enough.
The Angel Fun: It's a good thing she was praying for you that day. She was remembering you in her prayers, asking for special blessings for you.
Zed: I thought it was me who drove my bike faster.
The Angel Fun: You thought.
Zed: But why would she pray for me? I don't know her. She doesn't know me.
The Angel Fun: Don't you remember those cookies you especially loved at After School Club over at the church? Who do you think baked them? Angels? And she always remembered the way you'd take two or three, and always went for them first.
Chris: So this is holy ground?
The Angel Fun: The holiest. When Satan sees people like your grandmothers coming, he's running. They look weak, but they are very powerful. They've been working their spiritual muscles all their lives long.
Pat: So, you're saying I should visit here more often? But what about the rest of the class?
Astrid: Let's visit my grandmother. She's a lot more fun. Mine lives at our home and still makes cookies. She's cool.
The Angel Fun: Yes, your whole class could visit your grandmother. But you could also all get involved at the nursing home. Your whole class could go and sing songs there. You could bring treats. You could adopt residents and write letters.
Fritz: That's a great idea. We could come here once a year and really make a difference!
The Angel Fun: Once a year?
Fritz: Okay, maybe once a month. To start out. And then we'll see.
(Grandma stirs in bed, and sits up. She does not see anyone, except the Angel.)
Grandma: Oh. Oh, have I been sleeping again? The more I sleep, the less time to pray for people I love.
The Angel Fun: And who do you love?
Grandma: (turns slowly in bed) Oh, you again. Are you here to come get me?
The Angel Fun: Not yet. But someday.
Grandma: Whenever the Lord is ready. And you ask who I love? I love everybody, or at least I try to. Some people aren't easy to love, but that makes me pray harder. What else do I have left, but love and prayer?
The Angel Fun: What else is there? How is your family?
Grandma: They seem well, when I see them. Of course, they're always in a rush. They come later than they say they will, and they stay less then they promise, but I don't hold them to their promises. I remember what it was like when life seemed all a rush and there wasn't time for anything.
Pat: Hey, Grandma, I'm here! Over here!
Melody: I don't think she can hear you.
Grandma: Life's not easy here, but there are plenty of folks who have it worse. And it seems like I see you folks more and more often which is a good sign.
The Angel Fun: It's a very good sign. Now go back to sleep. You'll need your rest.
Grandma: Any particular reason?
The Angel Fun: I don't know. Maybe you'll be getting some visitors soon.
Grandma: (laughs) Not very likely. But it's a nice thought.
The Angel Fun: We'll see.
(Grandma goes back to sleep.)
Astrid: So this is holy ground? Well, it's certainly another world. It's not like holy ground is anywhere near where we live.
The Angel Fun: Don't be too sure.
(More noise and lights. The bed is taken out and replaced with a single school chair, with Dale, a student, sitting there alone.)
Dale: (begins to fold a paper airplane) Hey, bay-bee, hey, bay-bee. (talks to people the others can't see) Hey, is that supposed to be your nose? I thought it was Mount Rushmore. I thought it was the ski joint. Hey, you're ugly and your mother dresses you funny. Laugh, why don't ya? Don't you know what's funny?
Banyon: Whoah, that's Dale, at the school. This isn't holy ground. This is just the opposite of holy ground.
Wilson: You aren't kidding. I remember when I broke my arm. He said stupid stuff for weeks, inventing different ways he thought I broke it. I can't even repeat any of them.
Bailey: Maybe this is unholy ground, and there's going to be an army of angels coming to cleanse this place. Stand back. There's going to be some fireworks in a minute! (laughs)
Pat: That's right! Stand back! You ain't see nothing yet!
Dale: Hey, Bay-bee! I'm talking to you. Hey, Bay-bee! Who cut your hair? It looks terrible. How come your shirt has a pocket? What's in the pocket? Diamonds? Pencils? Is that a plastic pencil protector? Or a lead-lined radioactive pencil protector? Hey. Bay-bee! I'm talking to you.
Astrid: So when do the fireworks start?
The Angel Fun: I'm not laughing.
Melody: Well, you might as well start laughing, because he won't stop, whether you laugh or not.
The Angel Fun: Folks, you're standing on holy ground. Take off your shoes.
Dusty: Look out! Here come the rest of the angels to finish him off. (pauses) Honest. (pauses) Okay, so there aren't any more angels. Why are we here? There's Dale, and we all hate him because he hates everyone. He's real hurtful. He knows how to hurt people.
Banyon: And his parents won't stop him. They say it's funny.
Bailey: And the teachers won't try anymore. They know it doesn't do any good. He doesn't care what they do to him.
The Angel Fun: Are you saying that here is the one person Jesus did not die for?
Chris: (pauses uncomfortably) No. But going to the nursing home is sounding better and better. When do we start?
The Angel Fun: Let me ask you a question. Have any of you ever invited Dale to your Sunday school class?
Astrid: Are you kidding? Church is the one place we can get away from him. He's at the football games, he's at the dances, and whenever I go to the store he's there, too, making fun of what we put into the grocery cart.
Dale: Cheerio! Hey, cheerio! What are you, English? Why you putting Cheerios in your basket? Why can't you just say, "Hello," like a normal person. Cheeeerio! Whooo, Whoooo! Here comes the Cheeeerio train!
Astrid: Are you sure he can't hear us?
The Angel Fun: (a little surprised) No, I'm not sure. But all the same, do you think he's ever been to any church. Any church? Ever?
Wilson: His parents don't go. I heard his grandmother took him once when he was a little kid but the grownups complained and after a while she stopped taking him.
The Angel Fun: Well, this is holy ground. It's also dangerous ground. I'd like to say that if you invite him to church it'll work out, but there are some things even angels don't know.
Zed: I'm liking this holy ground business less and less. I want to go back to that burning bush thing.
Wilson: Yeah. I'll take off my shoes any time.
Melody: Okay, okay. Let's suppose, just for the sake of argument, that we invite Dale to our Sunday school. What if he says, "No"? What if he comes and makes everyone miserable at church? What if he makes fun of people and they want to kick us out in addition to him?
The Angel Fun: What if? There are no guarantees, campers. That's the thing about heaven. All we ask is everything. Of course, that's all we offer as well.
Banyon: All right, all right. We get it. We'll draw straws and the loser -- I mean the winner -- will try to invite Dale to Sunday school.
The Angel Fun: Really try.
Banyon: Really try. But first we'll arrange those visits to the nursing home. They're starting to sound better and better.
Dusty: We'll take our youth choir there.
Zed: You've shown us holy ground close to home. How about something a little more exotic, a little more distant? The kind of thing you find in the Bible!
Chris: Something exciting!
The Angel Fun: Exotic? Exciting?
(There is another flash, more sound and lights. Dale's chair is taken away. A very quiet Hungry Person is sitting, hunched over, with an empty bowl in front. He/she is shivering, and barefoot.)
Zed: I guess we're near holy ground, because that person isn't wearing shoes or sandals.
Pat: Quiet. This looks serious.
Dusty: What's happening here?
(Hungry Person moans, and reaches, shaking for the bowl. He/she gazes into the bowl then moan and rolls over, shivering even more.)
Wilson: Hey! Hey! We're here to help.
Astrid: What's wrong? Tell us what's wrong?
Melody: There's no food in that bowl. That person is very hungry.
Bailey: It must be cold there. Look at that person shiver!
Wilson: We can help. Did anyone bring food to Sunday school?
Banyon: You know we're not supposed to bring food. It's not allowed.
Fritz: But we all do. Look, I've got some cupcakes.
Zed: And I've got some candy bars.
Chris: I don't need this sweater. I just wear it to church because I don't want to get my school clothes messy.
Dusty: I'm wearing thick socks. I'll give up my shoes.
Wilson: Hello! Hello! We're talking to you. We've got stuff for you!
Melody: Can you hear us?
(One by one, they toss the food and the clothing toward Hungry Person. The Angel catches the things.)
Astrid: Hey! We're trying to help.
Zed: Yeah. What are you doing?
The Angel Fun: You're seeing someone far off. You can't throw things there.
Astrid: But we want to help.
The Angel Fun: So do I.
Bailey: Then let's work together. We'll give you the stuff, and you fly at the speed of light and take them there.
The Angel Fun: I wish we could, but that's not how it works.
Dusty: What? What good is it being an angel if you can't do things?
The Angel Fun: I am an angel, it's good, and I'm doing things. I'm showing you. This is your world. There's nothing you can't do if you set your minds to it, including getting your help to people.
Zed: But how are we supposed to find out where this person is? How can we get the help there?
The Angel Fun: Are you telling me that with all your schooling, your computer skills, the internet, and 24-hours-a-day news you can't figure out where the hungry people are?
Wilson: But it costs money to send things. You could do it for free!
Chris: Why did you show us this when it wasn't possible to help?
The Angel Fun: Who says it's impossible?
Chris: We don't have any money.
The Angel Fun: Really?
Fritz: No, wait. This person here, that's someone who has no money. We've got money.
Chris: I don't ever have any money.
Wilson: You think? Add it up. Think of the money we spend on soda, on movies, on rentals, on just stuff. We've got money.
Bailey: This is not fair. We want to help.
The Angel Fun: It's not fair all right. Nothing about this world is fair, but God is good, and God is counting on you being good as well.
Banyon: We've got to find out where this person is. We've got to help.
The Angel Fun: I think we're getting somewhere. Guys, you've seen holy ground. It's all around you. It's down the street and around the world.
Wilson: The Bible Age isn't over, is it?
The Angel Fun: It's just beginning.
Fritz: Hey, wait! You're not going to leave that poor person alone, are you?
The Angel Fun: Hardly. No one is every abandoned. Ever. (kneels, takes the hand of Hungry Person, and puts a hand on his/her shoulder) Hold on. Help is coming. Uh, oh. I think I hear your teacher coming down the hall.
Banyon: You're not afraid of our teacher, are you?
The Angel Fun: Aren't I? Show a little respect. When you're around your Sunday school teacher you're also treading on holy ground. At least around the edge. See you.
(Boom, kaboom, and The Angel Fun is gone, along with Hungry Person. Sunday School Teacher walks in confidently, then stops suddenly, a little puzzled.)
Sunday School Teacher: There's something funny going on here.
Astrid: What do you mean?
Sunday School Teacher: I don't know. Nothing, I guess. Anyway, sorry to be away so long, but I'm sure you've had a good time without me. To tell you the truth, the pastor wanted to let us know something important, though I don't know if you'll be interested. It seems there's been a call for help through our denominational disaster relief for a particular country where the winter is coming on. People are freezing and they're starving, and they need help today, not tomorrow.
Bailey: Freezing? Starving, did you say?
Sunday School Teacher: That's right. They're a long way away, and there are plenty of clothes and food to ship to them, but with the economy in bad shape there isn't money to ship it, and it needs to go right now. They're asking for special donations, but some of the adult Sunday school classes say they've already helped. They said the youth ought to help. Honest, I didn't try to sign you up, but I said that at least I'd ask. Do you think you could --
Wilson: We could all go without soda for a week.
Zed: A month.
Pat: A year.
Chris: And I've got so much extra stuff I was thinking of holding a yard sale. I could donate the proceeds.
Astrid: We could all help.
Wilson: Count on us.
Sunday School Teacher: Well, this is a surprise. I was told that the youth didn't like to get involved. We can discuss this more at our evening youth meeting. Now tell me, what do you know about holy ground? Did you have time to open your Bibles?
(Students all raise their hands excitedly, saying, "Me, me, call on me!" Then all freeze and the play comes to an end.)
