The Party
Stories
Lightly Goes the Good News
Scripture Stories For Reflection
"Parties? The last thing I want is a party. They're a waste of time and you can't make money at a party." That's how Matt responded to any suggestion of a celebration. And his distaste for parties was no recent acquisition. As a youngster he learned this attitude from his parents.
"We don't believe in parties!" That's what they told him when he asked if he could have a birthday party like his friends. "Parties cost too much. Besides, you should spend your time doing something profitable!"
"Like what?"
"Like making money."
Matt felt cheated. He wished that he could be special at least one day of the year like the other kids. Their birthdays were times for presents, balloons, paper hats, colorful plates, and napkins. But his birthday was just another day. And he was so ashamed when his friends asked why his parents never gave him a party.
As the years passed, he learned to hide his hurt on birthdays by reminding himself of his parents' counsel: the value of thrift and the wastefulness of parties. Of course he made certain to remember their advice on all the other special days his parents didn't celebrate: holy days, national holidays, graduations. Clearly the lesson he learned was that nothing in life was worth celebrating. And since he didn't celebrate anything in his life, he decided not to celebrate anything in anyone else's life either. All parties were out! Better to concentrate on doing what he had been told repeatedly by his parents: making money.
And when he grew up? Well, at age twenty-four he got a job that paid well all right! But it wasn't the kind of job his folks had in mind. He became a tax collector -- a profession which horrified them and made him a traitor in the eyes of others.
"How can you work for the Romans? Robbing us to fill their pockets and your own?"
"I'm making money. Isn't that what you wanted?"
"But no one will want you in their company. You won't be invited to their homes. You...."
"So what? Since when is being with others so important? I don't need them!"
What his parents didn't realize was how Matt felt relieved that he had become a hated tax collector. Now his isolation wouldn't feel so personal. Now he was alone because of his job, not because he was Matt! Yet, in a strange way the attention Matt got as a tax collector met a need that his parents had never met. Collecting tolls on the border between Capernaum and Bethsaida, people had to notice him as he determined how much they owed on goods they were transporting. As an obstacle they couldn't ignore, he became at least for a few moments the center of someone's attention. Of course he never would have admitted this need to himself. He thought he was simply doing what was expected of any good tax collector.
Day after day he sat at his desk interrogating the travelers who came through his doors. One day a young man entered his office, sat down and declared the few items he had to carry over the border. Matt made his computations and concluded, "That will cost fifteen dollars."
"Fifteen dollars? But I don't have fifteen."
"Then you can't cross the border."
"But I must...."
"Fork over the money or forget about your little trip!"
"Well, I don't have the money. But I do have food."
"Food. For what?"
"For a party." The man smiled broadly.
"A party? You must be crazy!"
"Don't you like parties? Haven't you ever had one?"
"Well ... I, I ... No, I've never had a party," Matt stammered, "and I don't intend...."
"You've never had a party? Well, Matt, it's time you had one; we'll throw it in your honor. It'll be a birthday bash!" he laughed.
"But ... how do you know my name? And ... it's not my birth...." Matt stopped, brought both hands to his mouth and said, "My God, today is my birthday! How ... how?"
"It doesn't matter how I know. What matters is you deserve a party! And you're going to get one." Before Matt knew what was happening the man had taken a white tablecloth from his knapsack, cleared the money table and spread the tablecloth on the desk. Then he leaned out the window and cried to his friends, "Fellas! In here!" Four other young men entered the room. Their arms were loaded with cheese, fruit, wine, salami, and bagels. One of the men had balloons and streamers which he promptly strung from the beams.
Matt was too dumbfounded to protest. "I don't believe this," he murmured. Nor did the other travelers who crammed Matt's little office to pay their taxes.
"What's going on here?" they asked.
"Matt's party! Come and join us," the young man answered. "Okay, Matt?"
"Why, why, yes," Matt answered. "I guess it is."
"But what about the tolls?" the travelers asked.
"The tolls?" Matt had completely forgotten his job. For the first time in his life he was enjoying his own birthday party and he didn't want anything to spoil it. "Forget the tolls. Enjoy yourselves," he cried. Matt looked at the young man. He was amazed at how lavish this man had been towards him. No one had ever treated him to a party -- with balloons and streamers, no less! He didn't want the party to end.
The young man smiled warmly. "Great party, isn't it? You ought to throw a few parties yourself! Why stop a good thing! Right?"
"Right!" Matt laughed. "Why stop a good thing!"
"Oh, I know!" the man said, "Why not join us? You could be in charge of throwing parties and inviting others who have never been to any. Wouldn't that be great?"
Matt's eyes filled with tears. "I'd love it!"
"Good! Come and follow us! Oh, I almost forgot ... my name is Jesus. Welcome, welcome to our party."
Levi belonged.
Reflection
As children, some of us were forced to become adults before we were ready. Our playful childlike side was suppressed in favor of the serious adult side. The reasons why many adults as children shouldered the burden of adults are many. In some cases children had to parent a chemically dependent adult. In other cases they become surrogate spouses for a parent whose real partner was no longer physically or emotionally available. And some parents emphasized work so highly that there was no time for play.
Work was Matt's parents' priority, and so it became his. There was no time for celebration, not even on birthdays or holidays. But celebration is essential to growth. There are times in our lives when we need the playful celebration of our light. Celebrations make us more aware of the gifts our lives are to ourselves and to others. We all need to shine, and celebrations afford those opportunities. Without celebrations during which we can admire another's light or be admired, shame can flourish. "I am inadequate and inferior," is the feeling response to a light never celebrated.
That shame can be so painful that our work becomes a compensation for our sense of the inadequacy of our own light. By throwing ourselves into our work, we try to razzle dazzle others and ourselves into believing we are adequate. And we can never stop this razzle dazzle because we fear there'll be only darkness once the show of light is over.
From time to time all of us need to reevaluate the place of work in our lives. For some of us this stepping back is the first step forward. Only then can we realize our light isn't shining because of what we do but because of who we are! Is that the step we need to take?
"We don't believe in parties!" That's what they told him when he asked if he could have a birthday party like his friends. "Parties cost too much. Besides, you should spend your time doing something profitable!"
"Like what?"
"Like making money."
Matt felt cheated. He wished that he could be special at least one day of the year like the other kids. Their birthdays were times for presents, balloons, paper hats, colorful plates, and napkins. But his birthday was just another day. And he was so ashamed when his friends asked why his parents never gave him a party.
As the years passed, he learned to hide his hurt on birthdays by reminding himself of his parents' counsel: the value of thrift and the wastefulness of parties. Of course he made certain to remember their advice on all the other special days his parents didn't celebrate: holy days, national holidays, graduations. Clearly the lesson he learned was that nothing in life was worth celebrating. And since he didn't celebrate anything in his life, he decided not to celebrate anything in anyone else's life either. All parties were out! Better to concentrate on doing what he had been told repeatedly by his parents: making money.
And when he grew up? Well, at age twenty-four he got a job that paid well all right! But it wasn't the kind of job his folks had in mind. He became a tax collector -- a profession which horrified them and made him a traitor in the eyes of others.
"How can you work for the Romans? Robbing us to fill their pockets and your own?"
"I'm making money. Isn't that what you wanted?"
"But no one will want you in their company. You won't be invited to their homes. You...."
"So what? Since when is being with others so important? I don't need them!"
What his parents didn't realize was how Matt felt relieved that he had become a hated tax collector. Now his isolation wouldn't feel so personal. Now he was alone because of his job, not because he was Matt! Yet, in a strange way the attention Matt got as a tax collector met a need that his parents had never met. Collecting tolls on the border between Capernaum and Bethsaida, people had to notice him as he determined how much they owed on goods they were transporting. As an obstacle they couldn't ignore, he became at least for a few moments the center of someone's attention. Of course he never would have admitted this need to himself. He thought he was simply doing what was expected of any good tax collector.
Day after day he sat at his desk interrogating the travelers who came through his doors. One day a young man entered his office, sat down and declared the few items he had to carry over the border. Matt made his computations and concluded, "That will cost fifteen dollars."
"Fifteen dollars? But I don't have fifteen."
"Then you can't cross the border."
"But I must...."
"Fork over the money or forget about your little trip!"
"Well, I don't have the money. But I do have food."
"Food. For what?"
"For a party." The man smiled broadly.
"A party? You must be crazy!"
"Don't you like parties? Haven't you ever had one?"
"Well ... I, I ... No, I've never had a party," Matt stammered, "and I don't intend...."
"You've never had a party? Well, Matt, it's time you had one; we'll throw it in your honor. It'll be a birthday bash!" he laughed.
"But ... how do you know my name? And ... it's not my birth...." Matt stopped, brought both hands to his mouth and said, "My God, today is my birthday! How ... how?"
"It doesn't matter how I know. What matters is you deserve a party! And you're going to get one." Before Matt knew what was happening the man had taken a white tablecloth from his knapsack, cleared the money table and spread the tablecloth on the desk. Then he leaned out the window and cried to his friends, "Fellas! In here!" Four other young men entered the room. Their arms were loaded with cheese, fruit, wine, salami, and bagels. One of the men had balloons and streamers which he promptly strung from the beams.
Matt was too dumbfounded to protest. "I don't believe this," he murmured. Nor did the other travelers who crammed Matt's little office to pay their taxes.
"What's going on here?" they asked.
"Matt's party! Come and join us," the young man answered. "Okay, Matt?"
"Why, why, yes," Matt answered. "I guess it is."
"But what about the tolls?" the travelers asked.
"The tolls?" Matt had completely forgotten his job. For the first time in his life he was enjoying his own birthday party and he didn't want anything to spoil it. "Forget the tolls. Enjoy yourselves," he cried. Matt looked at the young man. He was amazed at how lavish this man had been towards him. No one had ever treated him to a party -- with balloons and streamers, no less! He didn't want the party to end.
The young man smiled warmly. "Great party, isn't it? You ought to throw a few parties yourself! Why stop a good thing! Right?"
"Right!" Matt laughed. "Why stop a good thing!"
"Oh, I know!" the man said, "Why not join us? You could be in charge of throwing parties and inviting others who have never been to any. Wouldn't that be great?"
Matt's eyes filled with tears. "I'd love it!"
"Good! Come and follow us! Oh, I almost forgot ... my name is Jesus. Welcome, welcome to our party."
Levi belonged.
Reflection
As children, some of us were forced to become adults before we were ready. Our playful childlike side was suppressed in favor of the serious adult side. The reasons why many adults as children shouldered the burden of adults are many. In some cases children had to parent a chemically dependent adult. In other cases they become surrogate spouses for a parent whose real partner was no longer physically or emotionally available. And some parents emphasized work so highly that there was no time for play.
Work was Matt's parents' priority, and so it became his. There was no time for celebration, not even on birthdays or holidays. But celebration is essential to growth. There are times in our lives when we need the playful celebration of our light. Celebrations make us more aware of the gifts our lives are to ourselves and to others. We all need to shine, and celebrations afford those opportunities. Without celebrations during which we can admire another's light or be admired, shame can flourish. "I am inadequate and inferior," is the feeling response to a light never celebrated.
That shame can be so painful that our work becomes a compensation for our sense of the inadequacy of our own light. By throwing ourselves into our work, we try to razzle dazzle others and ourselves into believing we are adequate. And we can never stop this razzle dazzle because we fear there'll be only darkness once the show of light is over.
From time to time all of us need to reevaluate the place of work in our lives. For some of us this stepping back is the first step forward. Only then can we realize our light isn't shining because of what we do but because of who we are! Is that the step we need to take?
