The Rules
Drama
Lectionary Scenes
56 Vignettes For Cycle C
Theme
The Law of the Lord is perfect but could easily be a reason for dominating other Christians.
Summary
The "Teacher" leads his little band of followers by the rules, but when he leaves, one of them questions his leadership and "the rules."
Playing Time
3 minutes
Setting
A church
Props
None
Costumes
Contemporary, casual
Time
The present
Cast
TEACHER -- more like a drill sergeant
STUDENT 1
STUDENT 2
STUDENT 3
TEACHER: (TEACHER MARCHES AND STUDENTS FOLLOW)
Hup, Hoop, Harip, Hore. Hup, Hoop, Harip, Hore.
We're the Christians with the rules.
We follow them 'cause we ain't fools.
We are poor, and sad, and lean,
We get beat up, but we live clean.
Count off.
ALL STUDENTS: One, two.
TEACHER: Count off.
ALL STUDENTS: Three, four.
TEACHER: Cadence count.
ALL STUDENTS: One, two, three, four, One, two, THREE, FOUR!
TEACHER: Halt. Right face. At ease. Now, Christians. We are in a war and we have to have rules. You know the rules. Live by the rules.
STUDENT 1: I can't live by the rules.
TEACHER: Blasphemy! All Christians live by the rules. That's why we have rules. So that we may follow the rules. The rules teach us how to live. Atten-hut! How do we live?
ALL STUDENTS: By the rules.
TEACHER: I can't hear you. Louder. How do we live?
ALL STUDENTS: BY THE RULES!
TEACHER: Repeat the rules!
ALL STUDENTS: The rules:
Rule #1 -- In poverty there is happiness.
Rule #2 -- In hunger there is happiness.
Rule #3 -- In sadness there is happiness.
Rule #4 -- In persecution there is happiness.
TEACHER: Good. Good. Now, how do we live?
ALL STUDENTS: BY THE RULES!
TEACHER: Very good. Now, go live by the rules. (TEACHER EXITS)
STUDENT 1: The rules. The rules are so difficult. I try to live by the rules, but I just can't.
STUDENT 2: Then you're not a good Christian. I live by the rules. Why can't you?
STUDENT 1: I don't know. I just can't seem to live by the rules.
STUDENT 3: Don't let the teacher hear you say that.
STUDENT 1: I can't follow the rules.
STUDENT 2: Rule #1 -- In poverty there is happiness. How difficult is it to be poor?
STUDENT 1: It's been very difficult for me. I was rich and I gave all my money to the poor. So, then I was poor.
STUDENT 3: And then you were happy, right?
STUDENT 1: No. When I became poor then all the rich Christians kept giving me money and things and soon I was rich again. I kept giving it away, but other people kept giving to me, and I was miserable trying to be poor. I just can't seem to stay poor. I failed.
STUDENT 3: That's horrible.
STUDENT 1: Oh, you don't know the half of it.
STUDENT 2: I'll pray for you.
STUDENT 3: Aren't you hungry?
STUDENT 1: Why, is it lunch time already?
STUDENT 3: No, I mean, the rule to be hungry.
STUDENT 2: Rule #2 -- In hunger there is happiness. I fast six days a week.
STUDENT 1: Well, I started fasting and I was happy for a couple of very long days. My stomach hurt and all I could think of was chocolate brownies and chocolate ice cream covered in chocolate syrup.
STUDENT 2: Did you read your Bible and pray?
STUDENT 1: I certainly did but I read about the feeding of the five thousand.
STUDENT 3: Well, that's biblical.
STUDENT 1: I know, but I got to thinking about how many brownies and dips of ice cream it took to give all those people dessert.
STUDENT 2: You didn't pray, did you?
STUDENT 1: And all that chocolate syrup.
STUDENT 2: I said, you forgot to pray. You can't do it without prayer.
STUDENT 1: I thought more about food than I had ever thought about food before. It was horrendous.
STUDENT 3: Are you sad?
STUDENT 1: Of course I'm sad.
STUDENT 2: Rule #3 -- In sadness there is happiness.
STUDENT 1: What about that rule? I can't quite figure that one out. "In sadness there is happiness." Am I stupid or what? How can a person be sad and that equals happiness? Am I missing something?
STUDENT 2: Yes, you are. You're missing the deeper meaning of sadness.
STUDENT 1: I thought the deeper meaning of sadness was the opposite of the deeper meaning of happiness.
STUDENT 2: Certainly not. Sadness is an emotional reaction, isn't it?
STUDENT 1: Yeah, I guess so.
STUDENT 3: You'd think that, wouldn't you? I used to think that. I really did.
STUDENT 2: Well, that's wrong. The sadness that is necessary for happiness is not emotional but a deliberate sadness. We decide to be sad and that, of course, makes us happy, knowing that we are really sad -- we're happy.
STUDENT 1: That sure clears it up for me -- not!
STUDENT 3: What about the last rule? I bet you have that one all confused in your little mind, too.
STUDENT 1: Well, no, that one is pretty clear.
STUDENT 3: Rule #4 -- In persecution there is happiness.
STUDENT 1: Persecution I can understand. The teacher and you two have helped me so much with that one that I think I have it very clear in my mind. There's just one thing that isn't very clear to me.
STUDENT 2: Oh, I'll be glad to help. What is it?
STUDENT 1: Why does persecution have to come from fellow Christians? (MARCHING OFF)
Oh, why do Christians have to crawl,
Like they are living under the law?
Why can't we be free with the Lord,
Doing things in one accord?
The Law of the Lord is perfect but could easily be a reason for dominating other Christians.
Summary
The "Teacher" leads his little band of followers by the rules, but when he leaves, one of them questions his leadership and "the rules."
Playing Time
3 minutes
Setting
A church
Props
None
Costumes
Contemporary, casual
Time
The present
Cast
TEACHER -- more like a drill sergeant
STUDENT 1
STUDENT 2
STUDENT 3
TEACHER: (TEACHER MARCHES AND STUDENTS FOLLOW)
Hup, Hoop, Harip, Hore. Hup, Hoop, Harip, Hore.
We're the Christians with the rules.
We follow them 'cause we ain't fools.
We are poor, and sad, and lean,
We get beat up, but we live clean.
Count off.
ALL STUDENTS: One, two.
TEACHER: Count off.
ALL STUDENTS: Three, four.
TEACHER: Cadence count.
ALL STUDENTS: One, two, three, four, One, two, THREE, FOUR!
TEACHER: Halt. Right face. At ease. Now, Christians. We are in a war and we have to have rules. You know the rules. Live by the rules.
STUDENT 1: I can't live by the rules.
TEACHER: Blasphemy! All Christians live by the rules. That's why we have rules. So that we may follow the rules. The rules teach us how to live. Atten-hut! How do we live?
ALL STUDENTS: By the rules.
TEACHER: I can't hear you. Louder. How do we live?
ALL STUDENTS: BY THE RULES!
TEACHER: Repeat the rules!
ALL STUDENTS: The rules:
Rule #1 -- In poverty there is happiness.
Rule #2 -- In hunger there is happiness.
Rule #3 -- In sadness there is happiness.
Rule #4 -- In persecution there is happiness.
TEACHER: Good. Good. Now, how do we live?
ALL STUDENTS: BY THE RULES!
TEACHER: Very good. Now, go live by the rules. (TEACHER EXITS)
STUDENT 1: The rules. The rules are so difficult. I try to live by the rules, but I just can't.
STUDENT 2: Then you're not a good Christian. I live by the rules. Why can't you?
STUDENT 1: I don't know. I just can't seem to live by the rules.
STUDENT 3: Don't let the teacher hear you say that.
STUDENT 1: I can't follow the rules.
STUDENT 2: Rule #1 -- In poverty there is happiness. How difficult is it to be poor?
STUDENT 1: It's been very difficult for me. I was rich and I gave all my money to the poor. So, then I was poor.
STUDENT 3: And then you were happy, right?
STUDENT 1: No. When I became poor then all the rich Christians kept giving me money and things and soon I was rich again. I kept giving it away, but other people kept giving to me, and I was miserable trying to be poor. I just can't seem to stay poor. I failed.
STUDENT 3: That's horrible.
STUDENT 1: Oh, you don't know the half of it.
STUDENT 2: I'll pray for you.
STUDENT 3: Aren't you hungry?
STUDENT 1: Why, is it lunch time already?
STUDENT 3: No, I mean, the rule to be hungry.
STUDENT 2: Rule #2 -- In hunger there is happiness. I fast six days a week.
STUDENT 1: Well, I started fasting and I was happy for a couple of very long days. My stomach hurt and all I could think of was chocolate brownies and chocolate ice cream covered in chocolate syrup.
STUDENT 2: Did you read your Bible and pray?
STUDENT 1: I certainly did but I read about the feeding of the five thousand.
STUDENT 3: Well, that's biblical.
STUDENT 1: I know, but I got to thinking about how many brownies and dips of ice cream it took to give all those people dessert.
STUDENT 2: You didn't pray, did you?
STUDENT 1: And all that chocolate syrup.
STUDENT 2: I said, you forgot to pray. You can't do it without prayer.
STUDENT 1: I thought more about food than I had ever thought about food before. It was horrendous.
STUDENT 3: Are you sad?
STUDENT 1: Of course I'm sad.
STUDENT 2: Rule #3 -- In sadness there is happiness.
STUDENT 1: What about that rule? I can't quite figure that one out. "In sadness there is happiness." Am I stupid or what? How can a person be sad and that equals happiness? Am I missing something?
STUDENT 2: Yes, you are. You're missing the deeper meaning of sadness.
STUDENT 1: I thought the deeper meaning of sadness was the opposite of the deeper meaning of happiness.
STUDENT 2: Certainly not. Sadness is an emotional reaction, isn't it?
STUDENT 1: Yeah, I guess so.
STUDENT 3: You'd think that, wouldn't you? I used to think that. I really did.
STUDENT 2: Well, that's wrong. The sadness that is necessary for happiness is not emotional but a deliberate sadness. We decide to be sad and that, of course, makes us happy, knowing that we are really sad -- we're happy.
STUDENT 1: That sure clears it up for me -- not!
STUDENT 3: What about the last rule? I bet you have that one all confused in your little mind, too.
STUDENT 1: Well, no, that one is pretty clear.
STUDENT 3: Rule #4 -- In persecution there is happiness.
STUDENT 1: Persecution I can understand. The teacher and you two have helped me so much with that one that I think I have it very clear in my mind. There's just one thing that isn't very clear to me.
STUDENT 2: Oh, I'll be glad to help. What is it?
STUDENT 1: Why does persecution have to come from fellow Christians? (MARCHING OFF)
Oh, why do Christians have to crawl,
Like they are living under the law?
Why can't we be free with the Lord,
Doing things in one accord?
