Sketch Practice
Drama
Lectionary Scenes
56 Vignettes For Cycle C
Theme
Without Jesus there will be no joy in any of our endeavors.
Summary
What looks like a couple getting ready for bed is really a sketch being practiced for Sunday morning, which we discover when the sketch doesn't go too well and the director interrupts. They find out it's not going well because "Jesus isn't in it."
Playing Time
4 minutes
Setting
The church
Props
None
Costumes
Lisa -- pajamas, robe, scuffs, and "gunk" on face
Ben -- pajamas, robe
Director -- clipboard, script
Time
The present
Cast
BEN -- husband
LISA -- wife
DIRECTOR
(IT'S NIGHTTIME AND EVERYONE IS ASLEEP. WELL, ALMOST EVERYONE. A WOMAN WANDERS ON STAGE IN A PENSIVE-DREAMY MOOD. SHE IS DRESSED IN HER PAJAMAS AND ROBE WITH HER HAIR UP IN CURLERS, BIG SCUFFS ON HER FEET AND COLD CREAM PACKED ON HER FACE. SHE SITS AND LOOKS DREAMILY INTO THE NIGHT AIR. SHE SITS FOR A WHILE, THEN A MAN JOINS HER. HE, TOO, IS IN NIGHT WEAR)
BEN: Honey, what's wrong? Are you all right? I woke up and you weren't there.
LISA: I was just thinking what a great life we have. This house, the kids, you know.
BEN: Yeah, I know. You know, I love you.
LISA: I love you, too. (THEY SNUGGLE)
BEN: (KISSES HER AND THEN RISES. WE NOTICE HE HAS COLD CREAM ON HIS FACE) Hey, I'll go make a cup of coffee and we can talk.
LISA: I'd like that. But what about Jesus?
BEN: Let Him make his own cup of coffee.
DIRECTOR: (ENTERS) Hold it. Hold it. Cut! What the heck is this? "Let Him make his own cup of coffee"?
BEN: I was just joking.
DIRECTOR: Come on, will you, Ben. We've got to get this sketch ready for Sunday morning.
BEN: I'm sorry.
DIRECTOR: Okay, okay. Let's take it from the top. And put some joy in it. There's no joy in it. (HE CROSSES TO REAR OF AUDIENCE. LISA ENTERS AND DOES THE SAME BIT)
BEN: (ENTERS) Honey, what's wrong? Are you all right? I woke up and you weren't there.
LISA: I was just thinking what a great life we have. This house, the kids, you know.
BEN: Yeah, I know. You know, I love you.
LISA: I love you, too. (THEY SNUGGLE)
BEN: (KISSES HER CHEEK AND THEN RISES. TO DIRECTOR) Hey, listen, Will, does she have to wear all this gunk?
LISA: Gunk!
DIRECTOR: (ENTERS) C'mon, people. What's so difficult? Let's get the thing done. I've got work to do. You've got work to do. So let's get serious. Let's try it again. Now, put your heart into it. I want to see joy! (BEN DRAWS DIRECTOR TO SIDE, WHISPERING IN HIS EAR)
LISA: Okay, what is going on? Will, is he talking about my face?
DIRECTOR: No, no. (TO BEN) I'll take care of it. Let's do it again. And can we get it right this time? (BEN INDICATES TO DIRECTOR THAT HE SHOULD REMEMBER THE THING HE HAD TOLD HIM) Oh, yes. Lisa, I've got an idea. Why not try it this time without all the gunk ...
LISA: Gunk!
DIRECTOR: I mean, stuff, er, ah, whatever it is. I think it'll be better without it. Your facial expressions will come through clearer.
LISA: (TAKING OFF GUNK) Okay. Okay. Let's just do it, okay?
DIRECTOR: All right. Everyone ready? Good. From the top. Remember -- joy! (LISA DOES HER OPENING BIT AGAIN)
BEN: (ENTERS) Honey, what's wrong? Are you all ...
LISA: Will, I just can't get into this now. Can we work on something else for a while and then come back to this?
DIRECTOR: C'mon, now. I've had it! What the heck's wrong with you two?
BEN: It wasn't me that time. I was serious. I was just getting into it. I was just beginning to feel the part.
LISA: I just lost it. I couldn't do it.
BEN: Well, if you'd just act.
LISA: Me? What about your clowning around? I'm not the one that told Jesus to make His own cup of coffee.
BEN: I didn't tell Jesus to make His own cup of coffee, I said...
DIRECTOR: Hold it. Wait a minute. Jesus isn't even in this until the end, and ... (HE LOOKS AT AUDIENCE IN SHOCK AS IF HE JUST REALIZED SOMETHING) You know what? I just thought of something. Jesus isn't in it.
BEN: Huh?
DIRECTOR: I mean, we didn't pray. That's why there's no joy. We need Jesus to put the joy in.
LISA: That's right.
DIRECTOR: Let's pray and then things will go better. (ALL EXIT)
Without Jesus there will be no joy in any of our endeavors.
Summary
What looks like a couple getting ready for bed is really a sketch being practiced for Sunday morning, which we discover when the sketch doesn't go too well and the director interrupts. They find out it's not going well because "Jesus isn't in it."
Playing Time
4 minutes
Setting
The church
Props
None
Costumes
Lisa -- pajamas, robe, scuffs, and "gunk" on face
Ben -- pajamas, robe
Director -- clipboard, script
Time
The present
Cast
BEN -- husband
LISA -- wife
DIRECTOR
(IT'S NIGHTTIME AND EVERYONE IS ASLEEP. WELL, ALMOST EVERYONE. A WOMAN WANDERS ON STAGE IN A PENSIVE-DREAMY MOOD. SHE IS DRESSED IN HER PAJAMAS AND ROBE WITH HER HAIR UP IN CURLERS, BIG SCUFFS ON HER FEET AND COLD CREAM PACKED ON HER FACE. SHE SITS AND LOOKS DREAMILY INTO THE NIGHT AIR. SHE SITS FOR A WHILE, THEN A MAN JOINS HER. HE, TOO, IS IN NIGHT WEAR)
BEN: Honey, what's wrong? Are you all right? I woke up and you weren't there.
LISA: I was just thinking what a great life we have. This house, the kids, you know.
BEN: Yeah, I know. You know, I love you.
LISA: I love you, too. (THEY SNUGGLE)
BEN: (KISSES HER AND THEN RISES. WE NOTICE HE HAS COLD CREAM ON HIS FACE) Hey, I'll go make a cup of coffee and we can talk.
LISA: I'd like that. But what about Jesus?
BEN: Let Him make his own cup of coffee.
DIRECTOR: (ENTERS) Hold it. Hold it. Cut! What the heck is this? "Let Him make his own cup of coffee"?
BEN: I was just joking.
DIRECTOR: Come on, will you, Ben. We've got to get this sketch ready for Sunday morning.
BEN: I'm sorry.
DIRECTOR: Okay, okay. Let's take it from the top. And put some joy in it. There's no joy in it. (HE CROSSES TO REAR OF AUDIENCE. LISA ENTERS AND DOES THE SAME BIT)
BEN: (ENTERS) Honey, what's wrong? Are you all right? I woke up and you weren't there.
LISA: I was just thinking what a great life we have. This house, the kids, you know.
BEN: Yeah, I know. You know, I love you.
LISA: I love you, too. (THEY SNUGGLE)
BEN: (KISSES HER CHEEK AND THEN RISES. TO DIRECTOR) Hey, listen, Will, does she have to wear all this gunk?
LISA: Gunk!
DIRECTOR: (ENTERS) C'mon, people. What's so difficult? Let's get the thing done. I've got work to do. You've got work to do. So let's get serious. Let's try it again. Now, put your heart into it. I want to see joy! (BEN DRAWS DIRECTOR TO SIDE, WHISPERING IN HIS EAR)
LISA: Okay, what is going on? Will, is he talking about my face?
DIRECTOR: No, no. (TO BEN) I'll take care of it. Let's do it again. And can we get it right this time? (BEN INDICATES TO DIRECTOR THAT HE SHOULD REMEMBER THE THING HE HAD TOLD HIM) Oh, yes. Lisa, I've got an idea. Why not try it this time without all the gunk ...
LISA: Gunk!
DIRECTOR: I mean, stuff, er, ah, whatever it is. I think it'll be better without it. Your facial expressions will come through clearer.
LISA: (TAKING OFF GUNK) Okay. Okay. Let's just do it, okay?
DIRECTOR: All right. Everyone ready? Good. From the top. Remember -- joy! (LISA DOES HER OPENING BIT AGAIN)
BEN: (ENTERS) Honey, what's wrong? Are you all ...
LISA: Will, I just can't get into this now. Can we work on something else for a while and then come back to this?
DIRECTOR: C'mon, now. I've had it! What the heck's wrong with you two?
BEN: It wasn't me that time. I was serious. I was just getting into it. I was just beginning to feel the part.
LISA: I just lost it. I couldn't do it.
BEN: Well, if you'd just act.
LISA: Me? What about your clowning around? I'm not the one that told Jesus to make His own cup of coffee.
BEN: I didn't tell Jesus to make His own cup of coffee, I said...
DIRECTOR: Hold it. Wait a minute. Jesus isn't even in this until the end, and ... (HE LOOKS AT AUDIENCE IN SHOCK AS IF HE JUST REALIZED SOMETHING) You know what? I just thought of something. Jesus isn't in it.
BEN: Huh?
DIRECTOR: I mean, we didn't pray. That's why there's no joy. We need Jesus to put the joy in.
LISA: That's right.
DIRECTOR: Let's pray and then things will go better. (ALL EXIT)
