A Fist And A Kiss
Stories
Contents
A Story to Live By: "A Fist and a Kiss" by Kenneth W. Morgan
Sharing Visions: "Do Not Let the Sun Go Down on Your Anger" by Marjorie Evans
Good Stories: "The Unknown Camper" by John Sumwalt
Scrap Pile: "9/11 Stories" by Tim Clausen (and John Hughes)
Send Stories For New Book
Dear StoryShare Friends,
There are a few weeks in the summer when the Revised Common Lectionary, which we follow on StoryShare, differs from the lectionary followed by some denominations. Don't despair, we will all soon be back to the same list. In the meantime, whatever lectionary you follow, we hope these stories on forgiveness, anger, and the hunger of the soul will resonate with the work the Spirit is doing in your life. Though it is a personal story, "A Fist and a Kiss" by Kenneth W. Morgan is a universal tale that can be told on many occasions.
Because this is the camping season, we have included one good campfire story. Do you have any camp stories to share? Send them to jsumwalt@naspa.net
A Story to Live By
A Fist and a Kiss
"Once in Damascus years ago, while strolling on a street called Straight -- wondering whether it is truly the most ancient street in the world that has served continuously as a marketplace -- I watched as a man who was riding slowly through the crowd on a bicycle with a basket of oranges precariously balanced on the handlebars was bumped by a porter so bent with a heavy burden that he had not seen him. The burden dropped, the oranges were scattered, and a bitter altercation broke out between the two men.
"After an angry exchange of shouted insults, as the bicyclist moved toward the porter with a clenched fist, a tattered little man slipped from the crowd, took the raised fist in his hand, and kissed it. A murmur of approval ran through the watchers, the antagonists relaxed, then people began picking up oranges and the little man drifted away."
Kenneth W. Morgan, who tells this story in his book Reaching For The Moon, says, "I have remembered that as a caring act, an act of devotion by a man who might have been a Syrian Muslim, a Syrian Jew, or a Syrian Christian."
This personal story appeared in a letter to the editor in The New York Times on January 30, 1991, during the third week of the Persian Gulf War. In a letter to this editor giving permission to reprint the story, Mr. Morgan wrote: "My reaction some time later to the episode on the street called Straight was regret that I wasn't enough of a Christian to have thought of kissing the fist myself."
Kenneth W. Morgan is a professor of religion emeritus at Colgate University. This story was first published on page 172 of his book Reaching for the Moon: On Asian Religious Paths, published by Anima Books, 1053 Wilson Avenue, Chambersburg, PA 17201.
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Sharing Visions
Do Not Let the Sun Go Down on Your Anger
by Marjorie Evans
Be angry but do not sin; do not let the sun go down on your anger ... be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, as God in Christ has forgiven you.
Ephesians 4:26a, 32
It was a ridiculous quarrel. Later, we couldn't even remember what it was about. But that night, neither my husband Ed nor I wanted to admit we were wrong. So, instead of following the biblical advice of not letting the sun go down on our wrath, we went to bed angry.
Turning my back to him, I thought we would soon go to sleep. But Ed kept tossing restlessly, and I lay there mulling over and over our harsh words to each other. I felt terrible, as if I were forsaken and all alone, and I huddled there, sobbing softly.
Finally Ed said, "Marjorie, why don't we go into the living room and pray?" Eager to do anything to rectify our relationship, I agreed. We knelt beside the coffee table, gave our problems to the Lord, and asked his forgiveness. We then apologized to each other and had a precious time of reconciliation.
We returned to bed and soon fell into a peaceful sleep, but during the night, every time I turned over I was aware of a wonderful spicy fragrance. However, I couldn't wake up enough to find out what it was or where it was coming from.
The next morning, the fragrance was gone. Excitedly, I told Ed, "I think Jesus was here last night, because all night long I smelled an exotic and spicy fragrance, perhaps like incense. It was more fragrant than anything I've ever smelled. And I felt absolutely at peace. I'm sure it was Jesus, comforting us and letting us know he is pleased with us."
"I didn't smell anything, Honey," Ed responded. "But you're more sensitive than I am, so I'm sure you're right. I also had a peaceful night's sleep."
Giving me a big hug and kiss, Ed went on to say, "We serve a wonderful Lord who is concerned about every aspect of our lives. I do know he was pleased when we prayed last night, gave our differences to him, and forgave each other."
Marjorie Evans, a retired elementary schoolteacher, is a freelance writer with many published articles and stories, including some in the Chicken Soup for the Soul series. She is a member of Pacific Church of Irvine, California.
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Good Stories
The Unknown Camper
by John Sumwalt
Jesus said to them, "I am the bread of life. Whoever comes to me will never be hungry, and whoever believes in me will never be thirsty."
John 6:35
One summer at Lake Lucerne, in the Hillcrest area, there appeared in every week-long elementary camp a small child who came to be called the Unknown Camper. He was first seen on Monday of the first week near the Chipmunk Cabin, picking raspberries on the edge of the woods. He had on a Lake Lucerne t-shirt, shorts, and an official camp cap. When the director first spotted him, she called out to him and asked which cabin group he belonged to. The child didn't answer and immediately disappeared into the woods.
The following week, the lifeguard counted 61 campers during a buddy check. There were only 60 names on his roster. The lifeguard noticed that one of the campers didn't have a buddy. When he approached him to ask about it, the camper ran off into the woods and was seen no more that week.
The next week, one of the counselors reported being wakened by a noise in the night. When he turned on his flashlight to check on his campers, he couldn't believe his eyes. There was an extra camper in the spare bed. The counselor didn't recognize the camper, who was sound asleep. He thought the camper must be from another cabin, and decided to sort it out in the morning. But the next morning the extra camper was gone, and all of the other counselors insisted that their campers had been tucked safely in their beds throughout the night.
It was during the Mission Camp, midway through the summer season, while the staff was watching a video of the annual mission parade, that they found the first concrete proof of the Unknown Camper's presence. One of the counselors said, "Who is that camper bringing up the rear of the procession?" They all looked, but no one recognized the little boy who was dressed like all of the other campers in a Lake Lucerne t-shirt and cap. One counselor said, "He sat at my table during crafts and no one seemed to know who he was. I thought he was from one of the other units and had stayed late to finish his craft project."
The identity of the Unknown Camper remained a mystery until the last week of camp. The director began to watch for the little boy every day. Then she saw him one evening, sitting inconspicuously on the end of a log at the evening campfire service. The director went up to him, sat down beside him on the log, and put her hand on his arm so he couldn't run away, as he had done so many times before. She talked quietly with the Unknown Camper for a long time. He told her that he lived on a farm with his parents on the other side of the woods. His parents were good, hard-working people, but they didn't have time to take him to church, and they couldn't afford to send him to church camp. For years he had watched the kids in the camp from the edge of the woods. They appeared to be having so much fun that he longed to join them and share in their games and crafts. He said he especially enjoyed listening to the singing and the stories around the campfire. One day, he came upon a Lake Lucerne t-shirt and a cap left behind by one of the campers. He decided that, if he looked like the rest of the campers, perhaps he could join in some of the fun. He said he usually made his appearances at the beginning of the week, before the counselors had learned the names of all the campers.
The director walked with Jimmy through the woods to his parents' farm. She told him that if his parents were willing, she would arrange a scholarship for him so that he could attend church camp the next summer as a full participant. She also contacted the pastor of the neighboring church, and he found a family that was willing to give Jimmy a ride to Sunday School and worship every week.
The following summer, Jimmy reported to Hillcrest for Mission Camp dressed in his Lake Lucerne t-shirt and cap. That year, he led the procession in the mission parade and he took his turn leading songs and telling stories around the campfire. When the camp was over, Jimmy said it was the most exciting week of his life. He said he couldn't wait to come back the next year.
Note: This story is dedicated to the campers and counselors of the July 1990 Mission Camp at Lake Lucerne, near Neshkoro, Wisconsin, where the story was created. In an alternate version of the story, the mysterious camper turns out to be a chipmunk named Mike who has eaten so much camp food that he begins to look and dress like a camper. He eventually joins the camp staff, goes on to seminary, and becomes a pastor.
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Scrap Pile
9/11 Stories
by Tim Clausen (and John Hughes)
Out of the depths I cry to you, O Lord. Lord, hear my voice!
Psalm 130:1
I have had the incredible honor of being very involved with a number of east coast families who lost loved ones on September 11, 2001, and as a personal outreach, I have completed in-depth interview projects for well over a dozen families thus far. The work continues. It has been indescribably powerful and profoundly gratifying to be able to lend my talents, helping to document for these families their (and their close friends') personal recollections of the deceased, so that the very young children of these altered families (and someday these children's children) can get to know what the parent who never came home after that dark sunlit Tuesday morning was like, and what kind of difference they made in people's lives.
To date I've completed nearly 100 hours of interviews, and with permission from the families involved, I have put together an hour's worth of many of the best and most powerful moments from these interviews on a CD recording I have titled Voices of September 11th -- The Families. This audio-only documentary of our worst national disaster contains very poignant things, very funny moments, very sad things, moments of grace. I wish to share this recording in person with groups of people, as it is an extremely powerful teaching tool, one which helps listeners to reflect on their own lives, values, and priorities, and upon their own personal experiences of loss and love and grace and grief and healing.
The following is the text of an article by John Hughes which appeared in the July 1st edition of Vital Source magazine in Milwaukee about this work. Please feel free to contact me if you would like to arrange a personal presentation of this recording. I guarantee that all who listen will find it to be a most profound, thought-provoking, and important experience.
Tim Clausen
tclausen@myexcel.com>
Phone (home): 414-372-8008
Voice Mail: 414-571-6863
Tim Clausen, 43, is sitting motionless in his darkened East Side home, concentrating. Within my view are several stacks of books, towers of videos and CDs, an elderly upright piano, a forest of plants, and this lean individual, listening with both ears. He is listening to the voices of deep pain, a network of desolation, on a CD which he has recorded and produced.
The CD is titled The Voices of September 11: The Families, and that is just what it is. Without sound effects, mood music, or Hollywoodish voice-overs, the CD is simply an hour of brutally honest interviews with families who have survived the death of a loved one. Tim is the one interviewing them on the CD, probing openly, honestly, and gently, listening with a compassion indicated by his groans and appropriate chuckles. He has recorded over 80 hours of conversations with the bereaved, giving the CDs to the families he's interviewed as keepsakes he calls "lifeworks legacy-interviews," time capsules made "so kids can get to know their dads better through this." He has distilled the 80 hours into one hour for the rest of us, to hear, and contemplate, and remember.
"I'd see the point of the airplane in my living room," says the mother of one of the pilots whose plane smashed into the World Trade Center. "Repeatedly. I sought out a psychiatrist, because I kept seeing the fire in my living room. I never knew death was so bad. But there's nothing I can do."
"We were hearing reports that they were pulling out live people from the rubble, and I just couldn't stand the thought of my husband down underneath there with a hundred broken bones, bleeding," says one widow. "So I went outside and ran to the top of the street and just lost it. I prayed to God, 'Please tell me he's with you, and not suffering terribly. Just give me a sign.' And moments later, I looked up and I saw a shooting star. And this huge rush came over me and I thought, 'Oh my God. He's home. He's with God now, and I need to accept that.' I knew he wasn't coming back."
The listening is harrowing; it revisits the horror of those events, now nearly two years old, but Tim is unflinching, in both the interviewing and the listening with me. He's looking straight into the horror. For the general populace, those events are beginning to recede into history, but for the bereaved, their loved ones are dead again today. Tim Clausen has extended a hand to a few of those many who are still grieving.
Tim was born and raised in Oconomowoc, and by his own admission "did extensive research and development with drugs and alcohol," and by the age of 16 found himself in a treatment center. There, he met the man who was to change his life, an Episcopal bishop, Chandler Sterling, who was visiting to "take fifth steps," which means listening to people give an account of their past actions.
"I ran into him out on a patio. He was reading the landscape and grounds there like the Native Americans do, showing me how a nearby branch hanging low indicated the presence of underground water. We struck up a friendship. He was brilliant, spiritual, free-thinking, and he became my mentor. Chandler died in 1983, and after bumbling through several more years of booze and drugs, I finally got clean 14 years ago, when my son was a year old."
It is obvious that the help he received from his friend is now being offered to others.
I ask Tim why he is doing these legacy interviews for the survivors, why, out of 270 million Americans, he might be the only one reaching out in this way, befriending these families and continuing to speak with them via phone.
"Because I care," he says. "I realize that I'm not here on this earth for my own little benefit. I just feel like it's something I'm supposed to do, to help out. I truly feel led to do this work, these interviews. The compilation CD really just evolved over the course of many months and interviews, and it's actually an audio documentary of our worst national disaster. Besides, all this outreach has helped to make up for the dullness of my personal life." He winks.
This CD isn't the only manner in which he's reached out. In the winter of 2001, Tim, an exquisite jazz pianist, recorded a tastefully elegant CD of compositions by Duke Ellington, George Gershwin, Burt Bacharach, and Tim himself, and called it Jazz Helping, because the proceeds, after expenses, go to help the survivor families. This CD is still available, and may be purchased for $16.95 apiece at Jazz Helping, P.O. Box 511218, Milwaukee, WI 53203. He plays "church gigs" on Sunday mornings around town, presenting the songs from his CD, and discussing the testimonies of the survivor families on his interview disk. "Invariably people say that it makes them reflect on their own lives."
He's been through his own dark time, his pain, his confrontation with his self, and been helped by a godsend. Now he has the courage to make himself available to others, without fanfare or drama, without judgment.
On the evening I visited him, as we listened, we heard people crying on the tape, expressing love, resiliency, faith, ongoing grief. One mother who lost a son says, "I don't care about anything. I just feel like half of my life is wasted." You hear the depths of her agony.
At least she has a safe person in whom to confide.
Shared with permission from Tim Clausen
**********************************************
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New Book Released
We are happy to report that the second volume in the vision series, Sharing Visions: Divine Revelations, Angels, and Holy Coincidences , is now available from CSS Publishing Company. You can see what the book looks like by going to the home page of the CSS website http://www.csspub.com. Then click on the cover of the book to get more information.
Special Pricing for StoryShare Subscribers
Sharing Visions retails for $19.95. CSS has graciously agreed to make the book available to StoryShare subscribers for just $11.97 (plus shipping & handling). To take advantage of this special pricing, you must use the special code SS40SV. Simply e-mail your order to orders@csspub.com or phone 1-800-241-4056. If you live outside the U.S., phone 419-227-1818.
Practical Ministry Tool
I found the first volume of Vision Stories to be a great tool for ministry. I give a copy to each family after a funeral, and to each couple after a wedding. I give copies to people who come in for counseling and are searching for God's presence, seeking comfort or assurance. And I have given the book to many people who have visions and have wondered if they dared to tell anyone. I also make the books available to the congregation at my cost.
I am willing to come to your community to do a book signing, tell vision stories, or do a vision seminar if you will take a free will offering to cover travel expenses.
Collecting Personal Stories of "Holy Moments"
We are collecting personal stories for a third volume in the vision series, to be released in 2004. The working title is Holy Moments: Life-Changing Visions and Other Signs of God's Presence. If you have any stories to share of your personal experience of the holy, please send them to jsumwalt@naspa.net
Praise For Sharing Visions
Bishop Richard Wilke, creator of the Disciple Bible Study series, writes: "I am rejoicing as I read the testimonies in Sharing Visions . What an inspiration! I recall my father, an unemotional man, telling me that his mother (who had died some years before) appeared to him in a dream and gave him counsel on a difficult decision he was wrestling with."
To learn more about John and Jo Sumwalt, visit their church website: http://www.waumc.org Click on "staff" for bios and photos.
StoryShare, August 10, 2003, issue.
Copyright 2003 by CSS Publishing Company, Inc., Lima, Ohio.
All rights reserved. Subscribers to the StoryShare service may print and use this material as it was intended in sermons, in worship and classroom settings, in brief devotions, in radio spots, and as newsletter fillers. No additional permission is required from the publisher for such use by subscribers only. Inquiries should be addressed to permissions@csspub.com or to Permissions, CSS Publishing Company, Inc., P.O. Box 4503, Lima, Ohio 45802-4503.
A Story to Live By: "A Fist and a Kiss" by Kenneth W. Morgan
Sharing Visions: "Do Not Let the Sun Go Down on Your Anger" by Marjorie Evans
Good Stories: "The Unknown Camper" by John Sumwalt
Scrap Pile: "9/11 Stories" by Tim Clausen (and John Hughes)
Send Stories For New Book
Dear StoryShare Friends,
There are a few weeks in the summer when the Revised Common Lectionary, which we follow on StoryShare, differs from the lectionary followed by some denominations. Don't despair, we will all soon be back to the same list. In the meantime, whatever lectionary you follow, we hope these stories on forgiveness, anger, and the hunger of the soul will resonate with the work the Spirit is doing in your life. Though it is a personal story, "A Fist and a Kiss" by Kenneth W. Morgan is a universal tale that can be told on many occasions.
Because this is the camping season, we have included one good campfire story. Do you have any camp stories to share? Send them to jsumwalt@naspa.net
A Story to Live By
A Fist and a Kiss
"Once in Damascus years ago, while strolling on a street called Straight -- wondering whether it is truly the most ancient street in the world that has served continuously as a marketplace -- I watched as a man who was riding slowly through the crowd on a bicycle with a basket of oranges precariously balanced on the handlebars was bumped by a porter so bent with a heavy burden that he had not seen him. The burden dropped, the oranges were scattered, and a bitter altercation broke out between the two men.
"After an angry exchange of shouted insults, as the bicyclist moved toward the porter with a clenched fist, a tattered little man slipped from the crowd, took the raised fist in his hand, and kissed it. A murmur of approval ran through the watchers, the antagonists relaxed, then people began picking up oranges and the little man drifted away."
Kenneth W. Morgan, who tells this story in his book Reaching For The Moon, says, "I have remembered that as a caring act, an act of devotion by a man who might have been a Syrian Muslim, a Syrian Jew, or a Syrian Christian."
This personal story appeared in a letter to the editor in The New York Times on January 30, 1991, during the third week of the Persian Gulf War. In a letter to this editor giving permission to reprint the story, Mr. Morgan wrote: "My reaction some time later to the episode on the street called Straight was regret that I wasn't enough of a Christian to have thought of kissing the fist myself."
Kenneth W. Morgan is a professor of religion emeritus at Colgate University. This story was first published on page 172 of his book Reaching for the Moon: On Asian Religious Paths, published by Anima Books, 1053 Wilson Avenue, Chambersburg, PA 17201.
Return to top
Sharing Visions
Do Not Let the Sun Go Down on Your Anger
by Marjorie Evans
Be angry but do not sin; do not let the sun go down on your anger ... be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, as God in Christ has forgiven you.
Ephesians 4:26a, 32
It was a ridiculous quarrel. Later, we couldn't even remember what it was about. But that night, neither my husband Ed nor I wanted to admit we were wrong. So, instead of following the biblical advice of not letting the sun go down on our wrath, we went to bed angry.
Turning my back to him, I thought we would soon go to sleep. But Ed kept tossing restlessly, and I lay there mulling over and over our harsh words to each other. I felt terrible, as if I were forsaken and all alone, and I huddled there, sobbing softly.
Finally Ed said, "Marjorie, why don't we go into the living room and pray?" Eager to do anything to rectify our relationship, I agreed. We knelt beside the coffee table, gave our problems to the Lord, and asked his forgiveness. We then apologized to each other and had a precious time of reconciliation.
We returned to bed and soon fell into a peaceful sleep, but during the night, every time I turned over I was aware of a wonderful spicy fragrance. However, I couldn't wake up enough to find out what it was or where it was coming from.
The next morning, the fragrance was gone. Excitedly, I told Ed, "I think Jesus was here last night, because all night long I smelled an exotic and spicy fragrance, perhaps like incense. It was more fragrant than anything I've ever smelled. And I felt absolutely at peace. I'm sure it was Jesus, comforting us and letting us know he is pleased with us."
"I didn't smell anything, Honey," Ed responded. "But you're more sensitive than I am, so I'm sure you're right. I also had a peaceful night's sleep."
Giving me a big hug and kiss, Ed went on to say, "We serve a wonderful Lord who is concerned about every aspect of our lives. I do know he was pleased when we prayed last night, gave our differences to him, and forgave each other."
Marjorie Evans, a retired elementary schoolteacher, is a freelance writer with many published articles and stories, including some in the Chicken Soup for the Soul series. She is a member of Pacific Church of Irvine, California.
Return to top
Good Stories
The Unknown Camper
by John Sumwalt
Jesus said to them, "I am the bread of life. Whoever comes to me will never be hungry, and whoever believes in me will never be thirsty."
John 6:35
One summer at Lake Lucerne, in the Hillcrest area, there appeared in every week-long elementary camp a small child who came to be called the Unknown Camper. He was first seen on Monday of the first week near the Chipmunk Cabin, picking raspberries on the edge of the woods. He had on a Lake Lucerne t-shirt, shorts, and an official camp cap. When the director first spotted him, she called out to him and asked which cabin group he belonged to. The child didn't answer and immediately disappeared into the woods.
The following week, the lifeguard counted 61 campers during a buddy check. There were only 60 names on his roster. The lifeguard noticed that one of the campers didn't have a buddy. When he approached him to ask about it, the camper ran off into the woods and was seen no more that week.
The next week, one of the counselors reported being wakened by a noise in the night. When he turned on his flashlight to check on his campers, he couldn't believe his eyes. There was an extra camper in the spare bed. The counselor didn't recognize the camper, who was sound asleep. He thought the camper must be from another cabin, and decided to sort it out in the morning. But the next morning the extra camper was gone, and all of the other counselors insisted that their campers had been tucked safely in their beds throughout the night.
It was during the Mission Camp, midway through the summer season, while the staff was watching a video of the annual mission parade, that they found the first concrete proof of the Unknown Camper's presence. One of the counselors said, "Who is that camper bringing up the rear of the procession?" They all looked, but no one recognized the little boy who was dressed like all of the other campers in a Lake Lucerne t-shirt and cap. One counselor said, "He sat at my table during crafts and no one seemed to know who he was. I thought he was from one of the other units and had stayed late to finish his craft project."
The identity of the Unknown Camper remained a mystery until the last week of camp. The director began to watch for the little boy every day. Then she saw him one evening, sitting inconspicuously on the end of a log at the evening campfire service. The director went up to him, sat down beside him on the log, and put her hand on his arm so he couldn't run away, as he had done so many times before. She talked quietly with the Unknown Camper for a long time. He told her that he lived on a farm with his parents on the other side of the woods. His parents were good, hard-working people, but they didn't have time to take him to church, and they couldn't afford to send him to church camp. For years he had watched the kids in the camp from the edge of the woods. They appeared to be having so much fun that he longed to join them and share in their games and crafts. He said he especially enjoyed listening to the singing and the stories around the campfire. One day, he came upon a Lake Lucerne t-shirt and a cap left behind by one of the campers. He decided that, if he looked like the rest of the campers, perhaps he could join in some of the fun. He said he usually made his appearances at the beginning of the week, before the counselors had learned the names of all the campers.
The director walked with Jimmy through the woods to his parents' farm. She told him that if his parents were willing, she would arrange a scholarship for him so that he could attend church camp the next summer as a full participant. She also contacted the pastor of the neighboring church, and he found a family that was willing to give Jimmy a ride to Sunday School and worship every week.
The following summer, Jimmy reported to Hillcrest for Mission Camp dressed in his Lake Lucerne t-shirt and cap. That year, he led the procession in the mission parade and he took his turn leading songs and telling stories around the campfire. When the camp was over, Jimmy said it was the most exciting week of his life. He said he couldn't wait to come back the next year.
Note: This story is dedicated to the campers and counselors of the July 1990 Mission Camp at Lake Lucerne, near Neshkoro, Wisconsin, where the story was created. In an alternate version of the story, the mysterious camper turns out to be a chipmunk named Mike who has eaten so much camp food that he begins to look and dress like a camper. He eventually joins the camp staff, goes on to seminary, and becomes a pastor.
Return to top
Scrap Pile
9/11 Stories
by Tim Clausen (and John Hughes)
Out of the depths I cry to you, O Lord. Lord, hear my voice!
Psalm 130:1
I have had the incredible honor of being very involved with a number of east coast families who lost loved ones on September 11, 2001, and as a personal outreach, I have completed in-depth interview projects for well over a dozen families thus far. The work continues. It has been indescribably powerful and profoundly gratifying to be able to lend my talents, helping to document for these families their (and their close friends') personal recollections of the deceased, so that the very young children of these altered families (and someday these children's children) can get to know what the parent who never came home after that dark sunlit Tuesday morning was like, and what kind of difference they made in people's lives.
To date I've completed nearly 100 hours of interviews, and with permission from the families involved, I have put together an hour's worth of many of the best and most powerful moments from these interviews on a CD recording I have titled Voices of September 11th -- The Families. This audio-only documentary of our worst national disaster contains very poignant things, very funny moments, very sad things, moments of grace. I wish to share this recording in person with groups of people, as it is an extremely powerful teaching tool, one which helps listeners to reflect on their own lives, values, and priorities, and upon their own personal experiences of loss and love and grace and grief and healing.
The following is the text of an article by John Hughes which appeared in the July 1st edition of Vital Source magazine in Milwaukee about this work. Please feel free to contact me if you would like to arrange a personal presentation of this recording. I guarantee that all who listen will find it to be a most profound, thought-provoking, and important experience.
Tim Clausen
tclausen@myexcel.com>
Phone (home): 414-372-8008
Voice Mail: 414-571-6863
Tim Clausen, 43, is sitting motionless in his darkened East Side home, concentrating. Within my view are several stacks of books, towers of videos and CDs, an elderly upright piano, a forest of plants, and this lean individual, listening with both ears. He is listening to the voices of deep pain, a network of desolation, on a CD which he has recorded and produced.
The CD is titled The Voices of September 11: The Families, and that is just what it is. Without sound effects, mood music, or Hollywoodish voice-overs, the CD is simply an hour of brutally honest interviews with families who have survived the death of a loved one. Tim is the one interviewing them on the CD, probing openly, honestly, and gently, listening with a compassion indicated by his groans and appropriate chuckles. He has recorded over 80 hours of conversations with the bereaved, giving the CDs to the families he's interviewed as keepsakes he calls "lifeworks legacy-interviews," time capsules made "so kids can get to know their dads better through this." He has distilled the 80 hours into one hour for the rest of us, to hear, and contemplate, and remember.
"I'd see the point of the airplane in my living room," says the mother of one of the pilots whose plane smashed into the World Trade Center. "Repeatedly. I sought out a psychiatrist, because I kept seeing the fire in my living room. I never knew death was so bad. But there's nothing I can do."
"We were hearing reports that they were pulling out live people from the rubble, and I just couldn't stand the thought of my husband down underneath there with a hundred broken bones, bleeding," says one widow. "So I went outside and ran to the top of the street and just lost it. I prayed to God, 'Please tell me he's with you, and not suffering terribly. Just give me a sign.' And moments later, I looked up and I saw a shooting star. And this huge rush came over me and I thought, 'Oh my God. He's home. He's with God now, and I need to accept that.' I knew he wasn't coming back."
The listening is harrowing; it revisits the horror of those events, now nearly two years old, but Tim is unflinching, in both the interviewing and the listening with me. He's looking straight into the horror. For the general populace, those events are beginning to recede into history, but for the bereaved, their loved ones are dead again today. Tim Clausen has extended a hand to a few of those many who are still grieving.
Tim was born and raised in Oconomowoc, and by his own admission "did extensive research and development with drugs and alcohol," and by the age of 16 found himself in a treatment center. There, he met the man who was to change his life, an Episcopal bishop, Chandler Sterling, who was visiting to "take fifth steps," which means listening to people give an account of their past actions.
"I ran into him out on a patio. He was reading the landscape and grounds there like the Native Americans do, showing me how a nearby branch hanging low indicated the presence of underground water. We struck up a friendship. He was brilliant, spiritual, free-thinking, and he became my mentor. Chandler died in 1983, and after bumbling through several more years of booze and drugs, I finally got clean 14 years ago, when my son was a year old."
It is obvious that the help he received from his friend is now being offered to others.
I ask Tim why he is doing these legacy interviews for the survivors, why, out of 270 million Americans, he might be the only one reaching out in this way, befriending these families and continuing to speak with them via phone.
"Because I care," he says. "I realize that I'm not here on this earth for my own little benefit. I just feel like it's something I'm supposed to do, to help out. I truly feel led to do this work, these interviews. The compilation CD really just evolved over the course of many months and interviews, and it's actually an audio documentary of our worst national disaster. Besides, all this outreach has helped to make up for the dullness of my personal life." He winks.
This CD isn't the only manner in which he's reached out. In the winter of 2001, Tim, an exquisite jazz pianist, recorded a tastefully elegant CD of compositions by Duke Ellington, George Gershwin, Burt Bacharach, and Tim himself, and called it Jazz Helping, because the proceeds, after expenses, go to help the survivor families. This CD is still available, and may be purchased for $16.95 apiece at Jazz Helping, P.O. Box 511218, Milwaukee, WI 53203. He plays "church gigs" on Sunday mornings around town, presenting the songs from his CD, and discussing the testimonies of the survivor families on his interview disk. "Invariably people say that it makes them reflect on their own lives."
He's been through his own dark time, his pain, his confrontation with his self, and been helped by a godsend. Now he has the courage to make himself available to others, without fanfare or drama, without judgment.
On the evening I visited him, as we listened, we heard people crying on the tape, expressing love, resiliency, faith, ongoing grief. One mother who lost a son says, "I don't care about anything. I just feel like half of my life is wasted." You hear the depths of her agony.
At least she has a safe person in whom to confide.
Shared with permission from Tim Clausen
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New Book Released
We are happy to report that the second volume in the vision series, Sharing Visions: Divine Revelations, Angels, and Holy Coincidences , is now available from CSS Publishing Company. You can see what the book looks like by going to the home page of the CSS website http://www.csspub.com. Then click on the cover of the book to get more information.
Special Pricing for StoryShare Subscribers
Sharing Visions retails for $19.95. CSS has graciously agreed to make the book available to StoryShare subscribers for just $11.97 (plus shipping & handling). To take advantage of this special pricing, you must use the special code SS40SV. Simply e-mail your order to orders@csspub.com or phone 1-800-241-4056. If you live outside the U.S., phone 419-227-1818.
Practical Ministry Tool
I found the first volume of Vision Stories to be a great tool for ministry. I give a copy to each family after a funeral, and to each couple after a wedding. I give copies to people who come in for counseling and are searching for God's presence, seeking comfort or assurance. And I have given the book to many people who have visions and have wondered if they dared to tell anyone. I also make the books available to the congregation at my cost.
I am willing to come to your community to do a book signing, tell vision stories, or do a vision seminar if you will take a free will offering to cover travel expenses.
Collecting Personal Stories of "Holy Moments"
We are collecting personal stories for a third volume in the vision series, to be released in 2004. The working title is Holy Moments: Life-Changing Visions and Other Signs of God's Presence. If you have any stories to share of your personal experience of the holy, please send them to jsumwalt@naspa.net
Praise For Sharing Visions
Bishop Richard Wilke, creator of the Disciple Bible Study series, writes: "I am rejoicing as I read the testimonies in Sharing Visions . What an inspiration! I recall my father, an unemotional man, telling me that his mother (who had died some years before) appeared to him in a dream and gave him counsel on a difficult decision he was wrestling with."
To learn more about John and Jo Sumwalt, visit their church website: http://www.waumc.org Click on "staff" for bios and photos.
StoryShare, August 10, 2003, issue.
Copyright 2003 by CSS Publishing Company, Inc., Lima, Ohio.
All rights reserved. Subscribers to the StoryShare service may print and use this material as it was intended in sermons, in worship and classroom settings, in brief devotions, in radio spots, and as newsletter fillers. No additional permission is required from the publisher for such use by subscribers only. Inquiries should be addressed to permissions@csspub.com or to Permissions, CSS Publishing Company, Inc., P.O. Box 4503, Lima, Ohio 45802-4503.
