Searching For God, Finding Oneself
Stories
Contents
What's Up This Week
"Searching for God, Finding Oneself" by Sandra Herrmann
"Then What Will You Do?" by Argile Smith
"Take It All Off" by Sandra Herrmann
Note: This installment was originally published in 2007.
What's Up This Week
Finding ourselves spiritually is the common theme running through this week's edition of StoryShare. In our featured story, Sandra Herrmann tells of an adolescent boy who is sent off into the forest on a "vision quest" -- and who discovers there a symbolic representation of his life that changes his outlook. Then Argile Smith shares the story of a cocky young law school graduate who thinks he has all the bases covered... but whose inability to definitively answer a simple question reveals how much he still needs to learn to understand his spiritual future. Finally, Sandra Herrmann offers a brief meditation on how the clothes we wear tells us much about ourselves -- and how it is something of a metaphor for our need to take off the behavioral clothes of "this world" and replace them with the behavioral traits of a child of God. Only then can we find in ourselves the person that Christ wants us to be.
* * * * * * * * *
Searching for God, Finding Oneself
by Sandra Herrmann
Hosea 11:1-11
Tom was sweating as he sat on a high bluff overlooking the Black River. He checked his canteen again, but there was barely half a cup of water left. He wet his tongue and screwed the cap back on. He had eaten the last of his food yesterday. He picked up a stone and half-heartedly threw it down towards the river. It fell short, causing a miniature landslide where it fell.
Grandfather Littlecloud has been clear. "You need to grow up. In the old days, young men like you sought a vision from Grandfather God. They went out into the forest and waited for the appearance of a totem, an animal who leads us into self-knowledge and the presence of God. Now would be a good time for you to do this."
Tom had welcomed the challenge. He could take care of himself, even if Grandfather Littlecloud hadn't yet realized it. At first, he had explored the riverbank, looking for a sign, but today it was hot and he was tired. Even the birds were panting rather than singing.
The point of the Vision Quest was to find a direction for his life. He hoped to see a hawk, or even a bald eagle, up on these heights. On most days the birds would drift on the air currents above the dark waters down to the falls, then lazily flap their six-foot wings to go back upstream and turn to drift again. Eagles were powerful guardians, and he was sure that he would see one if he sat near the river. But not today.
Tom was not used to sitting and waiting. He was a powerful and swift runner, usually taking first or second place in the foot races at the powwows. But this year he came in third. He'd been too lazy, he knew, too arrogant, to spend time preparing.
Tom sighed, lowering his head to his chest. "You need to grow up. Go seek a vision." His grandfather's words matched his heartbeats. "Grow up. Seek a vision. Grow up."
CA-AW!
Tom's head snapped up. Had he fallen asleep?
CA-AW! CAW!
Tom looked up. On a hemlock branch to his right was the biggest crow he had ever seen. It tipped its head to one side, then the other, observing him with onyx eyes. It hopped sideways, turned its back to him, then turned again and croaked again.
"Hello yourself," Tom replied. "What do you want? I have nothing shiny with me." Crows love anything shiny and will steal anything that takes their fancy. Loud, raucous, and mischievous, crows could be serious nuisances. But they were also one of the totems of his people.
The crow suddenly cried out several short, sharp notes, and in the distance Tom could see at least a dozen crows heading this way. Tom looked up at the gigantic crow on the tree branch.
"Are you my spirit guide?" Tom asked, awestruck. He watched as the crows settled on branches all around him. He had never seen so many crows at once, nor heard such a racket as they noisily pushed each other to claim space and pecking order. He couldn't help but laugh. And when he did they all fell absolutely silent, watching him. Tom was suddenly aware of his sweat drying up, the small hairs on his neck standing straight. What was happening?
The birds said nothing. He could feel their eyes on him, hear the barest rustle of their feathers as they shifted slightly, observing him. The forest and the river seemed to have taken a deep breath and were holding it in silence. He remembered Grandfather Littlecloud's stories about Crow, who is so taken with bright and shiny things that he gathers up the souls of the good people when they die and takes them to heaven. "He is a powerful totem," Grandfather Littlecloud had said.
"But he's such a clown! And a thief!" Tom had protested. "How can he be a powerful totem?"
"In his clownishness is his power," Grandfather had replied. "He distracts rather than fights. He laughs at danger. No work is beneath him: he removes dead creatures from the roads. And crows know how to work together: as the farmer shoots at one, the rest of the gang feasts on his corn."
Tom had frowned. A good thief? A raucous deliverer of souls? A clever carrion eater? A divine pest?
Now he threw back his head and laughed. He realized the truth of himself. He, too, was a clown, driving his elders crazy with his laziness and pranks, seeking attention, questioning everything. God had seen his heart, his desire to be someone, to do great things, to change the world for the good. He still had much to learn, but as Tom rose to his feet and slapped the sand out of his jeans, he already stood differently.
And as he ran home, the entire gang of crows raced him.
Sandra Herrmann is pastor of Memorial United Methodist Church in Greenfield, Wisconsin. She is the author of Ambassadors of Hope (CSS); her articles and sermons have also appeared in Emphasis and The Circuit Rider, and her poetry has been published in Alive Now and So's Your Old Lady.
Then What Will You Do?
by Argile Smith
Luke 12:13-21
Evan finally finished law school. The road to graduation for him had been paved with lots of ups and downs. Although his grades didn't show much promise, his lackluster academic record didn't pose as big a problem for him as his ego. His arrogance seemed to be his biggest menace, and it only got worse with each semester. Actually, Evan didn't register much concern about the way he barely passed his courses, and warnings about his lack of potential for success didn't get much traction in his mind either. His dad had built a successful law firm in his hometown. Evan boasted more than once that his dad had an office for him once he graduated from law school. The certainty of the job waiting for him made him arrogant and careless.
Dr. McKenzie had watched Evan's bloated ego disfigure his perception of his future. He had enrolled in some of her classes, and she had tried to teach him but found herself getting frustrated with him. Evan's mammoth ego obstructed a clear picture of his foolish behavior.
Because Dr. McKenzie was a Christian, she noticed with concern an even more troublesome habit that plagued Evan. His arrogance about his place in his father's law firm had prevented him from factoring eternity into his life equation. She had heard him pontificate in class on the need to embrace life's adventures here and now with no thought of tomorrow. After all, he kept on insisting, we have the greatest fun when we live in the moment. He ignored serious consideration of his future.
On graduation day, Dr. McKenzie made her way to Evan at the reception so she could talk with him one more time before he left for good. She struck up a conversation with him by asking, "Well, Evan, now that you have finished law school, what's next?"
Evan replied with characteristic bravado, "Don't you remember? I'm going back home!"
"Then what will you do?" she asked him.
"Well," he said, seeing that he had an interested audience, "my dad's already got an office just waiting for me at his law firm. For as long as I can remember, he's told me that one day I would work with him. So now I am going to make his dream come true."
"Then what will you do?"
"My plan right now is to get my license, settle in to my office, and work with my dad on a few cases so I can get a feel for it all."
"Then what will you do?"
"I really haven't given it much thought. I've kicked around the idea of settling down, maybe getting married, buying a house. Things like that."
"Then what will you do"
"Oh, you know, have kids, take over the firm when Dad retires, maybe buy a boat."
"Then what will you do?"
"Doc, I can't really say that I've thought that far in advance. Maybe I'll give the firm to one of my kids and retire myself when I've got all I want."
Sensing that she was about to reach the end of Dave's patience, she asked, "Well, then what will you do?"
With her question, Evan let his frustration show with his reply. "I suppose I'll die like everybody else!"
Then she asked, "Then what will you do?"
In the parable of the rich farmer, Jesus showed the foolishness of failing to factor in eternity when we think about our future. So did Dr. McKenzie's conversation with Evan.
Argile Smith is vice president for advancement at William Carey University in Hattiesburg, Mississippi. He has been the pastor of several congregations in Louisiana and Mississippi, and has also served as a preaching professor, chairman of the Division of Pastoral Ministries, and director of the communications center at New Orleans Baptist Theological Seminary. While at NOTBS, Smith regularly hosted the Gateway to Truth program on the FamilyNet television network.
Take It All Off
by Sandra Herrmann
Colossians 3:1-11
I remember my grandmother wearing an apron most of the day. She put dusting cloths in one pocket, and the other one was for all the "stuff" she found around the house as she went. When it was time for my grandfather to come home from work, she took the apron off, showered, put on fresh lipstick, patted her hair into shape, and greeted him at the door as though she had never been working at all. It was amazing to me as I grew older that she could look so good when he got home, even if she'd been "glowing" all day. ("Ladies never 'sweat," she told me. "Horses sweat. Men perspire. Ladies glow.") The apron was to protect her housedress from ground-in dirt and foodstuffs. When she went back into the kitchen to finish and serve supper, on went a clean apron. When she finally shed the apron for the day, it was time to rest.
As I grew up, I noticed there were a lot of people who wore uniforms as they worked. The uniforms told me who they were and what they did: waitresses, busboys, nurses, doctors in their white coats, firefighters, police, security guards, lab technicians. Even my uncle wore safety glasses and a hard hat where he worked. And, of course, the pastor at church wore clothing that was largely symbolic: a black cassock under a white surplice, denoting the sinful person overlaid with the innocence of Christ.
Every one of us has the experience of wearing different clothes for different occasions. We don't go to a wedding in a sweater and jeans; we dress up to honor the occasion. Those who are "standing up" in a wedding go a step further. Men may rent a tuxedo, since the average man probably will wear a tux only for a wedding. The bride, of course, wears a dress so specially made for the occasion that she will never wear it again.
Likewise, there are rules for what one may wear to work. Even if an occupation does not require a uniform like some of those mentioned above, a young lady who wears her bridesmaid's gown to the office will (at the very least) be the subject of ridicule. The young man who goes to a job interview in the same sloppy t-shirt and shorts he wore to wash the car will lose out to the fellow who is neatly and appropriately dressed.
So we are familiar with the business of changing our clothes to match the situation. But what about changing who we are?
In 12-step groups, people learn that the old person, the guy or girl we used to be, can -- and ought to be -- "taken off" in favor of the person we can become. The old person they were may have been a difficult person to deal with: always late, always impatient, rude to others, using foul language as well as addictive substances, she or he may have behaved as though the world revolved around him or her and demanded to be the center of attention at all times. Or it could be worse, involving damage to self, property, or others.
But one doesn't have to be an addict to be impossible, arrogant, rude, vindictive, slanderous, and to lash out at the world. Every one of us has been at least one of those sinners.
Twelve-step groups like Alcoholics Anonymous have a saying: Do a "zif." In plain language: "behave as though you really were a Christian." Begin by pretending you are loving, gentle, generous, kind, thoughtful. Put up notes to yourself, if necessary: "Tell so-and-so you love them." "It's Secretary's day; pick up flowers before work." "Find out the name of the parking attendant."
That's where we begin. We take off our pre-Christian personality traits and try out the traits Jesus would be proud of. And after a while, we hear someone say, "He sure is a nice guy. He remembered the receptionist's birthday. She cried because it's the first time anyone from work gave her flowers." Of course, we'll then have to struggle with the sin of pride, but that's OK. We're on the right path. We're putting on the ways and behaviors of a child of God. And soon, we'll find that we're not just "doing as if," we're actually becoming that person we aspire to be.
**************
StoryShare, August 5, 2007, issue.
Copyright 2007 by CSS Publishing Company, Inc., Lima, Ohio.
All rights reserved. Subscribers to the StoryShare service may print and use this material as it was intended in sermons, in worship and classroom settings, in brief devotions, in radio spots, and as newsletter fillers. No additional permission is required from the publisher for such use by subscribers only. Inquiries should be addressed to permissions@csspub.com or to Permissions, CSS Publishing Company, Inc., 517 South Main Street, Lima, Ohio 45804.
What's Up This Week
"Searching for God, Finding Oneself" by Sandra Herrmann
"Then What Will You Do?" by Argile Smith
"Take It All Off" by Sandra Herrmann
Note: This installment was originally published in 2007.
What's Up This Week
Finding ourselves spiritually is the common theme running through this week's edition of StoryShare. In our featured story, Sandra Herrmann tells of an adolescent boy who is sent off into the forest on a "vision quest" -- and who discovers there a symbolic representation of his life that changes his outlook. Then Argile Smith shares the story of a cocky young law school graduate who thinks he has all the bases covered... but whose inability to definitively answer a simple question reveals how much he still needs to learn to understand his spiritual future. Finally, Sandra Herrmann offers a brief meditation on how the clothes we wear tells us much about ourselves -- and how it is something of a metaphor for our need to take off the behavioral clothes of "this world" and replace them with the behavioral traits of a child of God. Only then can we find in ourselves the person that Christ wants us to be.
* * * * * * * * *
Searching for God, Finding Oneself
by Sandra Herrmann
Hosea 11:1-11
Tom was sweating as he sat on a high bluff overlooking the Black River. He checked his canteen again, but there was barely half a cup of water left. He wet his tongue and screwed the cap back on. He had eaten the last of his food yesterday. He picked up a stone and half-heartedly threw it down towards the river. It fell short, causing a miniature landslide where it fell.
Grandfather Littlecloud has been clear. "You need to grow up. In the old days, young men like you sought a vision from Grandfather God. They went out into the forest and waited for the appearance of a totem, an animal who leads us into self-knowledge and the presence of God. Now would be a good time for you to do this."
Tom had welcomed the challenge. He could take care of himself, even if Grandfather Littlecloud hadn't yet realized it. At first, he had explored the riverbank, looking for a sign, but today it was hot and he was tired. Even the birds were panting rather than singing.
The point of the Vision Quest was to find a direction for his life. He hoped to see a hawk, or even a bald eagle, up on these heights. On most days the birds would drift on the air currents above the dark waters down to the falls, then lazily flap their six-foot wings to go back upstream and turn to drift again. Eagles were powerful guardians, and he was sure that he would see one if he sat near the river. But not today.
Tom was not used to sitting and waiting. He was a powerful and swift runner, usually taking first or second place in the foot races at the powwows. But this year he came in third. He'd been too lazy, he knew, too arrogant, to spend time preparing.
Tom sighed, lowering his head to his chest. "You need to grow up. Go seek a vision." His grandfather's words matched his heartbeats. "Grow up. Seek a vision. Grow up."
CA-AW!
Tom's head snapped up. Had he fallen asleep?
CA-AW! CAW!
Tom looked up. On a hemlock branch to his right was the biggest crow he had ever seen. It tipped its head to one side, then the other, observing him with onyx eyes. It hopped sideways, turned its back to him, then turned again and croaked again.
"Hello yourself," Tom replied. "What do you want? I have nothing shiny with me." Crows love anything shiny and will steal anything that takes their fancy. Loud, raucous, and mischievous, crows could be serious nuisances. But they were also one of the totems of his people.
The crow suddenly cried out several short, sharp notes, and in the distance Tom could see at least a dozen crows heading this way. Tom looked up at the gigantic crow on the tree branch.
"Are you my spirit guide?" Tom asked, awestruck. He watched as the crows settled on branches all around him. He had never seen so many crows at once, nor heard such a racket as they noisily pushed each other to claim space and pecking order. He couldn't help but laugh. And when he did they all fell absolutely silent, watching him. Tom was suddenly aware of his sweat drying up, the small hairs on his neck standing straight. What was happening?
The birds said nothing. He could feel their eyes on him, hear the barest rustle of their feathers as they shifted slightly, observing him. The forest and the river seemed to have taken a deep breath and were holding it in silence. He remembered Grandfather Littlecloud's stories about Crow, who is so taken with bright and shiny things that he gathers up the souls of the good people when they die and takes them to heaven. "He is a powerful totem," Grandfather Littlecloud had said.
"But he's such a clown! And a thief!" Tom had protested. "How can he be a powerful totem?"
"In his clownishness is his power," Grandfather had replied. "He distracts rather than fights. He laughs at danger. No work is beneath him: he removes dead creatures from the roads. And crows know how to work together: as the farmer shoots at one, the rest of the gang feasts on his corn."
Tom had frowned. A good thief? A raucous deliverer of souls? A clever carrion eater? A divine pest?
Now he threw back his head and laughed. He realized the truth of himself. He, too, was a clown, driving his elders crazy with his laziness and pranks, seeking attention, questioning everything. God had seen his heart, his desire to be someone, to do great things, to change the world for the good. He still had much to learn, but as Tom rose to his feet and slapped the sand out of his jeans, he already stood differently.
And as he ran home, the entire gang of crows raced him.
Sandra Herrmann is pastor of Memorial United Methodist Church in Greenfield, Wisconsin. She is the author of Ambassadors of Hope (CSS); her articles and sermons have also appeared in Emphasis and The Circuit Rider, and her poetry has been published in Alive Now and So's Your Old Lady.
Then What Will You Do?
by Argile Smith
Luke 12:13-21
Evan finally finished law school. The road to graduation for him had been paved with lots of ups and downs. Although his grades didn't show much promise, his lackluster academic record didn't pose as big a problem for him as his ego. His arrogance seemed to be his biggest menace, and it only got worse with each semester. Actually, Evan didn't register much concern about the way he barely passed his courses, and warnings about his lack of potential for success didn't get much traction in his mind either. His dad had built a successful law firm in his hometown. Evan boasted more than once that his dad had an office for him once he graduated from law school. The certainty of the job waiting for him made him arrogant and careless.
Dr. McKenzie had watched Evan's bloated ego disfigure his perception of his future. He had enrolled in some of her classes, and she had tried to teach him but found herself getting frustrated with him. Evan's mammoth ego obstructed a clear picture of his foolish behavior.
Because Dr. McKenzie was a Christian, she noticed with concern an even more troublesome habit that plagued Evan. His arrogance about his place in his father's law firm had prevented him from factoring eternity into his life equation. She had heard him pontificate in class on the need to embrace life's adventures here and now with no thought of tomorrow. After all, he kept on insisting, we have the greatest fun when we live in the moment. He ignored serious consideration of his future.
On graduation day, Dr. McKenzie made her way to Evan at the reception so she could talk with him one more time before he left for good. She struck up a conversation with him by asking, "Well, Evan, now that you have finished law school, what's next?"
Evan replied with characteristic bravado, "Don't you remember? I'm going back home!"
"Then what will you do?" she asked him.
"Well," he said, seeing that he had an interested audience, "my dad's already got an office just waiting for me at his law firm. For as long as I can remember, he's told me that one day I would work with him. So now I am going to make his dream come true."
"Then what will you do?"
"My plan right now is to get my license, settle in to my office, and work with my dad on a few cases so I can get a feel for it all."
"Then what will you do?"
"I really haven't given it much thought. I've kicked around the idea of settling down, maybe getting married, buying a house. Things like that."
"Then what will you do"
"Oh, you know, have kids, take over the firm when Dad retires, maybe buy a boat."
"Then what will you do?"
"Doc, I can't really say that I've thought that far in advance. Maybe I'll give the firm to one of my kids and retire myself when I've got all I want."
Sensing that she was about to reach the end of Dave's patience, she asked, "Well, then what will you do?"
With her question, Evan let his frustration show with his reply. "I suppose I'll die like everybody else!"
Then she asked, "Then what will you do?"
In the parable of the rich farmer, Jesus showed the foolishness of failing to factor in eternity when we think about our future. So did Dr. McKenzie's conversation with Evan.
Argile Smith is vice president for advancement at William Carey University in Hattiesburg, Mississippi. He has been the pastor of several congregations in Louisiana and Mississippi, and has also served as a preaching professor, chairman of the Division of Pastoral Ministries, and director of the communications center at New Orleans Baptist Theological Seminary. While at NOTBS, Smith regularly hosted the Gateway to Truth program on the FamilyNet television network.
Take It All Off
by Sandra Herrmann
Colossians 3:1-11
I remember my grandmother wearing an apron most of the day. She put dusting cloths in one pocket, and the other one was for all the "stuff" she found around the house as she went. When it was time for my grandfather to come home from work, she took the apron off, showered, put on fresh lipstick, patted her hair into shape, and greeted him at the door as though she had never been working at all. It was amazing to me as I grew older that she could look so good when he got home, even if she'd been "glowing" all day. ("Ladies never 'sweat," she told me. "Horses sweat. Men perspire. Ladies glow.") The apron was to protect her housedress from ground-in dirt and foodstuffs. When she went back into the kitchen to finish and serve supper, on went a clean apron. When she finally shed the apron for the day, it was time to rest.
As I grew up, I noticed there were a lot of people who wore uniforms as they worked. The uniforms told me who they were and what they did: waitresses, busboys, nurses, doctors in their white coats, firefighters, police, security guards, lab technicians. Even my uncle wore safety glasses and a hard hat where he worked. And, of course, the pastor at church wore clothing that was largely symbolic: a black cassock under a white surplice, denoting the sinful person overlaid with the innocence of Christ.
Every one of us has the experience of wearing different clothes for different occasions. We don't go to a wedding in a sweater and jeans; we dress up to honor the occasion. Those who are "standing up" in a wedding go a step further. Men may rent a tuxedo, since the average man probably will wear a tux only for a wedding. The bride, of course, wears a dress so specially made for the occasion that she will never wear it again.
Likewise, there are rules for what one may wear to work. Even if an occupation does not require a uniform like some of those mentioned above, a young lady who wears her bridesmaid's gown to the office will (at the very least) be the subject of ridicule. The young man who goes to a job interview in the same sloppy t-shirt and shorts he wore to wash the car will lose out to the fellow who is neatly and appropriately dressed.
So we are familiar with the business of changing our clothes to match the situation. But what about changing who we are?
In 12-step groups, people learn that the old person, the guy or girl we used to be, can -- and ought to be -- "taken off" in favor of the person we can become. The old person they were may have been a difficult person to deal with: always late, always impatient, rude to others, using foul language as well as addictive substances, she or he may have behaved as though the world revolved around him or her and demanded to be the center of attention at all times. Or it could be worse, involving damage to self, property, or others.
But one doesn't have to be an addict to be impossible, arrogant, rude, vindictive, slanderous, and to lash out at the world. Every one of us has been at least one of those sinners.
Twelve-step groups like Alcoholics Anonymous have a saying: Do a "zif." In plain language: "behave as though you really were a Christian." Begin by pretending you are loving, gentle, generous, kind, thoughtful. Put up notes to yourself, if necessary: "Tell so-and-so you love them." "It's Secretary's day; pick up flowers before work." "Find out the name of the parking attendant."
That's where we begin. We take off our pre-Christian personality traits and try out the traits Jesus would be proud of. And after a while, we hear someone say, "He sure is a nice guy. He remembered the receptionist's birthday. She cried because it's the first time anyone from work gave her flowers." Of course, we'll then have to struggle with the sin of pride, but that's OK. We're on the right path. We're putting on the ways and behaviors of a child of God. And soon, we'll find that we're not just "doing as if," we're actually becoming that person we aspire to be.
**************
StoryShare, August 5, 2007, issue.
Copyright 2007 by CSS Publishing Company, Inc., Lima, Ohio.
All rights reserved. Subscribers to the StoryShare service may print and use this material as it was intended in sermons, in worship and classroom settings, in brief devotions, in radio spots, and as newsletter fillers. No additional permission is required from the publisher for such use by subscribers only. Inquiries should be addressed to permissions@csspub.com or to Permissions, CSS Publishing Company, Inc., 517 South Main Street, Lima, Ohio 45804.
