What Kindness Teaches
Children's sermon
Illustration
Preaching
Sermon
Worship
Object:
Dear Fellow Preacher,
We are heartened when mayors, business leaders, teachers, and parents discover that small acts of kindness are more effective in changing the behavior of others than are coercion and duress. This can be a hard lesson for impatient Americans to learn, especially in a self-oriented and increasingly polarized society. In this issue of The Immediate Word, Carlos Wilton points out that the Hebrew word hesed (which so often in the Old Testament refers to God's "loving kindness" or faithfulness) in the First Reading of the lectionary for September 21 is a central characteristic of the capable and faithful woman. It is a virtue to be inculcated.
Team members also assert the importance of hesed for healthy relationships on the part of men and women alike. They identify a number of examples from contemporary life -- some in which kindness has diminished or otherwise needs to be rekindled and others that demonstrate the power of kindness. Illustrations and worship resources that relate to this theme are included, along with a children's sermon on the Second Reading.
Contents
What Kindness Teaches
Team Comments
Related Illustrations
Worship Resources
Children's Sermon
WHAT KINDNESS TEACHES
by Carlos Wilton
Proverbs 31:10-31
The Message on a Postcard
"She opens her mouth with wisdom, and the teaching of kindness is on her tongue" (Proverbs 31:26).
The Hebrew word translated here as "kindness" is hesed -- the same rich word often translated "steadfast love" when it refers to God. The capable wife of Proverbs teaches hesed. The word "teaching" can also be translated "instruction." Oftentimes, as it's used in the Hebrew (though not always), it refers to instruction in the law -- law in the broadest sense, meaning not just the literal meaning of a specific ordinance but also the rich heritage of midrashic interpretation. The true teacher of God's law conveys not only the legal particulars but also a deep love of the law. The students of such a faithful teacher, like the rabbinical students celebrated in today's psalm, will find that "their delight is in the law of the Lord, and on his law they meditate day and night" (Psalm 1:2).
Perhaps a tie-in to current news would be the recent flap over the Ten Commandments monument in the Alabama Supreme Court building. State Supreme Court Chief Justice Roy Moore, who has recently been suspended from his duties, is passionately committed to teaching God's law as the foundation for human law -- something the presiding Federal judge, citing separation of church and state, is not allowing to continue. On September 9, Alabama Governor Bob Riley unveiled his own Ten Commandments monument in the State Capitol building. The new plaque -- much smaller than the 5,300 pound monolith Roy Moore had placed in the Supreme Court building -- will be accompanied by representations of the Magna Carta and the Bill of Rights, making it a historical display (thus squeaking by within Federal guidelines that say the Ten Commandments may be taught as history, but not in order to advance religion).
Justice Roy Moore is still not impressed. "To put things around the Ten Commandments and secularize it is to deny the greatness of God," he told a crowd of 1,500 supporters at a fund-raising dinner for his legal defense. Source: http://www.nytimes.com/aponline/national/AP-Ten-Commandments.html
There's an interesting theological issue here, amidst all the farcical legal hair-splitting. How does one teach kindness (or any other virtue, for that matter)? It's easy to say "be ye kind" -- indeed, no one in his or her right mind would disagree with that proposition -- but how do we teach that kind of behavior? Surely not by chiseling "be kind" into a slab of marble.
The anonymous woman in Proverbs has the teaching of kindness "on her tongue," but it's evidently more than mere words that accomplish the teaching. There's something about her very life that teaches kindness. She teaches not only by word but also by example. There are those who believe that our society's problems may be solved by simply teaching everyone the Ten Commandments, but in fact that won't get us very far. There's more that's required: the teaching of kindness. And that can never be communicated by cold stone, only by a warm and Godly heart.
Many of our churches have recently started up a new year of Sunday School. This is a Sunday when we can celebrate the work of the Sunday School from the pulpit: for truly it is a place where "the teaching of kindness" can happen, in ways that are impossible in the public schools or any other civic institution.
Some Words on the Word
Proverbs 31:10-31 is a remarkable piece of literature. Not only is it an extended discourse that differs from the one-liners that make up a good part of the rest of the book, in the original Hebrew it is also an acrostic poem (an acrostic is one in which each line begins with the subsequent letter of the alphabet).
Earlier in Proverbs, we have heard how the author praises wisdom, personified as a woman (1:20-33; 3:13-18; 8:1-9:6). Now, the figure of wisdom-as-woman takes particular human form, in this closing paean to "a capable wife." In 31:10 this capable woman is referred to as "more precious than jewels"; the same description is used in 3:15 to refer to wisdom. As Carol Fontaine points out in The Women's Bible Commentary: "Just as Woman Wisdom began the book with promises of wealth, happiness, honor, and long life as the reward for following her prudent teachings, the Woman of Worth and her fine household represent the concrete fulfillment of those earlier promises and so make a fitting conclusion to the work" (Louisville: Westminster John Knox, 1992, p. 152).
The word "wife" here has attracted some negative attention from modern commentators who are concerned with gender equality. In fact, as Fontaine points out, the term for "woman" and "wife" is the same in Hebrew (p. 151), and so not too much should be made of this woman's wifely status. What she does is simply what most women of that culture were expected to do. She is just particularly adept at living the life of practical wisdom.
This text should not be read in such a way as to assume that womanly virtue is limited to those working as homemakers; a deeper reading of the text reveals that the virtues of this woman have to do with her inner character, not with her particular tasks. She is a teacher not only of wisdom, but also of kindness (hesed, 31:26). Her talents are by no means limited to household work, in any event; this woman is a business entrepreneur and agricultural manager as well as a homemaker and mother. She is at ease making management decisions. She is evidently very well-off financially, having a staff of servants to supervise. That she and her husband fulfill traditional gender roles in Hebrew society (she in the home and marketplace, he governing with his fellow elders at the city gate) should come as no surprise, but neither should we assume that those traditional roles are prescriptive for today's society. This passage has more to do with character than specific roles or activities.
William Willimon raises a concern that this text could be misused to justify workaholism on the part of women who wear themselves out trying to "have it all." (The old, cloying television commercial comes to mind in this regard: the woman comes home from work, dressed in a business suit, and prances up to her husband, singing, "I can bring home the bacon, fry it up in a pan, and never let you forget I'm a woman!") Here are Willimon's comments:
In most congregations there are always some people, and often they seem to be women, who shoulder far too much responsibility. We praise them for their hard work, their dedication to their families and to the church. We find that we call on them repeatedly whenever there is tough work to be done. But ought we to do so? When does our praise of them for their hard work become a subtle form of abuse? ... While her gifts are remarkable, I am still hesitant to join this tough woman's children and husband who rise up to call her happy and blessed. I have known too many people, both women and men, who know no limits on their activity, who take upon their backs too much responsibility for making their families work, who say yes to every request for help, and who eventually pay dearly for what the rest of us hail as remarkable capability." (William H. Willimon on Proverbs 31:10-31, in The Lectionary Commentary, ed. Roger E. Van Harn [Grand Rapids: Eerdmans, 2001], p. 287)
One of the chief virtues this wise woman demonstrates is that of hesed ("kindness," but translated elsewhere as "steadfast love"). The teaching of hesed is on her tongue, but she very evidently teaches it not only in word, but also in deed. The term hesed is notoriously untranslatable. "Each of the English translational options -- love, loyalty, kindness, and even the less viable mercy -- highlights some of these characteristics of hesed while severely underplaying others ..." (Katharine Doob Sakenfeld, in The Anchor Bible Dictionary, ed. D. N. Freedman [New York: Doubleday, 1996], 4:378). Almost always the term is used to describe the behavior of the more powerful person in a covenant relationship toward the less powerful. The capable woman in Proverbs has a number of people over whom she has authority -- her servants and children -- and she is also generous to the needy (v. 20), so there is no shortage of candidates for her covenantal kindness.
Walter Brueggemann defines hesed as "the fulfillment of covenant obligations, based on a previously made pledge, to a partner in covenant by acting in ways consistent with loyalty and solidarity" (Reverberations of Faith: A Theological Handbook of Old Testament Themes [Louisville: Westminster John Knox, 1992], p. 127). This view of covenant faithfulness, Brueggemann continues, "is powerfully contrasted with the practice of the late modern world where everything is reduced to commoditization and advantage. In such a world, no durable fidelities sustain public life. The contemporary tension between a tradition of covenantal fidelity and electronic commoditization is thus as acute as can be imagined."
A Map of the Message
A sermon on this text could begin with a reference to the news story about the removal of the Ten Commandments monument from the Alabama Supreme Court building, and the governor's subsequent action to replace it with a more legally permissible version (see "The Message on a Postcard," above). The question all this raises is: How do we teach and encourage virtue? Do we teach virtue -- in this particular case, kindness -- by commanding it? Or do we teach it best by example?
The wise woman of Proverbs 31 is an excellent example of kindness. In spending so many verses extolling her excellent qualities, the author is holding her up as a paragon. One can only assume that those who are the recipients of her covenantal kindness -- her children whom she clothes in crimson (v. 21), and her servant-girls whose work she directs (v. 15) -- learn, from her example, how to pass kindness on to others.
There's no doubt our world could use a lot more kindness. So many of our daily human interactions are devoid of basic kindness that when someone ventures a genuine smile or thoughtful remark (beyond the meaningless "Have a nice day" of the store clerk, that is), it seems remarkable to us. So hungry are we for "the milk of human kindness" that Christian physician M. Scott Peck has found an audience for an entire book decrying the lack of basic civility: A World Waiting To Be Born: Civility Rediscovered (New York: Bantam, 1994). The 2000 film, Pay It Forward, with Kevin Bacon and Helen Hunt -- in which Hollywood treated as a revolutionary new idea the proposition that kindness is a good thing -- was a surprise box office sensation: http://payitforward.warnerbros.com/Pay_It_Forward/
There's even a charitable foundation whose sole purpose is to promote "random acts of kindness": http://www.actsofkindness.org/ All this is positive, but perhaps this proliferation of books and movies and even websites is indicative of the fact that the scarcity of true kindness in our culture is far-reaching and deeply-felt.
The wise woman of Proverbs is a teacher of kindness, but what is it, ultimately, that her kindness teaches? It is that God is kind. Her hesed is but a reflection of the greater hesed of the one who created and sustains all things. She is able to keep covenant with others because her God has kept covenant with her. When we practice kindness -- even in the most simple and ordinary ways -- we are being faithful.
One homiletical strategy could be to contrast the figure of the wise woman from Proverbs 31 with our contemporary society's diva of domesticity, Martha Stewart. "I don't run out of ideas," insists Martha Stewart; "I run out of time."
Anyone who has followed Martha's television program or magazine or publishing empire knows that steely determination of hers: to get it exactly right, to create what she calls "a good thing." For her fans, Martha Stewart is the unrivaled queen of running a household.
Martha, for example, is the one who advises "dressing up good-quality paper napkins with an embosser. It takes only a moment to make an imprint of your initials or a simple symbol in the corner of each napkin, and they'll be impressive enough for company." Martha's also the one who suggests hot-gluing freshly-cut ivy leaves to the edges of a tablecloth for decoration ("Ask Martha," in the Detroit News, 8/3/96, on the World Wide Web).
Martha's also the one who shared with readers of New York magazine the proper etiquette (as she sees it) for shoveling snow (In the immortal words of Dave Barry, "I am not making this up ..."): "Always leave an inch of snow so it looks nice and white. Aesthetics are very important in snow removal" ("Life" section, USA Today, Wednesday, January 17, 1996).
Martha's current difficulties with the Securities and Exchange Commission aside, she continues to be many Americans' ideal of how to manage a household. There's one thing that's largely missing, though, from her media-savvy lessons in household management: any hint of how to nurture and improve the lives of those living in the house (in fact, from most of her broadcasts, the casual viewer would assume she lives alone; the others for whom she prepares her elaborate celebrations are clearly guests). When it comes to window treatments, party invitations and gourmet cookery, Martha has no equal; but who would claim of her that "the teaching of kindness is on her tongue"?
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Team Comments
George Murphy responds: I suspect that some men, hearing this text about the "capable wife" and having "kindness" emphasized, may think that "kindness" is a distinctively "womanly" virtue, to be exercised primarily in the home. There is unfortunately an idea that functioning in the "real world" -- that of business, politics, and other affairs thought of as "manly" -- requires that one be unkind. After all, we all know that "it's a dog-eat-dog world," "a jungle," etc., out there.
But that kind of division is far too simplistic. While the description of the capable woman in Proverbs is set in a context of traditional gender roles, what is really emphasized about the woman is simply that she is capable. She is the manager of the household and "sees that her merchandise is profitable." From the description we're given, it's not much of a stretch to say that she would be capable in any area of work. On the other hand, what is learned in the home -- including kindness -- ought to be applicable in the real world. And if kindness doesn't seem relevant there, maybe there's something wrong with the way the real world is being run.
At a deeper level, the word translated "kindness," hesed, is -- as Carlos points out -- widely used in other places in the Hebrew scriptures, sometimes translated in other ways. (I don't have the detailed reference at hand, but this word is so important that an entire book has been written about it with Germanic thoroughness, Das Wort Hesed.) It is especially a characteristic of God, and in Psalm 136 "his hesed -- his mercy, his steadfast love -- endures forever" is a refrain that accompanies the descriptions of everything that the Lord has done and continues to do from creation through the history of salvation to the present day. "Kindness" is not a single English word that can describe this characteristic of God, but it's part of the English group of words that needs to be used to convey this concept.
In the real world it isn't always easy to be kind. Sometimes it requires a kind of tough love -- as when we're called to tell people the blunt truth about themselves or their situation. But this can be done with an attitude of kindness, even when the truth is painful. And when the truth is not going to help anybody, the kindest thing may be to remain silent: Your friend probably doesn't have to know what your other friend said about him.
The competitive character of American business and sports creates a climate in which kindness often seems irrelevant. I think that we can be competitive without being nasty. Maybe there's no way to tackle a ball carrier in a kind way, but the trash talking that often accompanies such action isn't necessary, and I'm glad that in the National Football League at least some attempts are made to penalize "taunting" and other such activities.
Maybe that will seem unrealistic to some sports fans, but it is possible to show respect for opponents even while they are opponents. It used to be called "sportsmanship." I recall a baseball game in Baltimore's old Memorial Stadium when the Orioles (who at that time were very good) were playing the New York Yankees. (Every baseball fan knows that if you're not a Yankees fan, your favorite team is probably the one that's playing the Yankees!) This was near the end of the career of the great Yankees slugger Mickey Mantle. His legs were shot at that point and he wasn't playing every day. He hadn't started this game but in the late innings, at a critical point, he was sent in as a pinch hitter. As he walked slowly to the plate the whole stadium full of Orioles fans stood and applauded. And one man standing next to me turned to his friend and said, "What are we cheering for? This guy could kill us!"
There is plenty of nastiness in the world, but sometimes we do see kindness and respect pop up. One of the things we need to do is simply to nurture kindness when it does appear.
Carter Shelley responds: The material on kindness causes me to wonder exactly what are we teaching our children these days. Many years ago when I was an associate minister, with youth ministry as one of my duties, I was struck by how often parents wanted the youth group church program to fix the areas of concern the parents felt their children needed addressing. As adolescents strive to gain independence from their parents and do not want to heed their advice or warnings, it's understandable that parents seek church leaders and volunteers to take up the slack. Areas of concern cited by parents always revolved around sex, drugs, alcohol, and use of the car. Never did I have a well-meaning, loving parent cite kindness or any other positive relational virtue as something they wanted their kids to learn. Yet the teaching of kindness in the home from toddler age on can completely shift the character of a human being when it comes to bullies on the playground, cruel, cutting remarks and slights in middle school, and openness and receptivity to people of other ethnic and social backgrounds in high school. Those who are taught to be kind, and who grasp the essential importance of caring about others, are a blessing and have been blessed. Atticus Finch in To Kill a Mockingbird comes to mind as a gentle, strong, brave, person of great character and faith.
Thank you for your many positive and sensitive remarks with reference to the Proverbs section on the virtuous woman/wife. I too saw the positive side of this text as an affirmation of women of initiative and hard work, who are allowed to actively participate in the household's economy and in the possibilities of entrepreneurialism, etc., and to glean and receive respect for her efforts. I also greatly appreciate your caveat that this text not be understood as a way to praise only hardworking, self-sacrificing homemakers.
While Proverbs seems to represent the human voice more than the divine, this text in particular can be misused to encourage women to overdo more than many already are. There used to be a glamorized Madison Avenue twentieth-century version of this ideal: the Aviance woman who sang, "I can bring home the bacon, fry it up in a pan, and never let you forget you're a man."
While I have been dismayed by the public glee over Martha Stewart's financial misdeeds (because it seems that the fall from public grace of successful women is greeted with more relish than is the fall of successful men), I have never had any desire to emulate her perfectionism in any way. In fact, in her pre-stock-scam days, I came close to buying a book titled Martha Stewart Makes Water, the implication being that she is so perfect she can accomplish miracles even Jesus couldn't (or wouldn't) manage. Anyway, as her bottom line suggests, many women do find Martha Stewart's good living example meaningful and an enviable goal. I greatly appreciate the way you have linked her example to the probable dangers we face when we strive for such unattainable and superficial goals. In some ways, Stewart's life serves as the antithesis of the kindness theme you pursue this week. Even before her financial debacle, Stewart was not known as someone who was kind to her staff or gave time to her family. She is not unique in this way. Many ambitious and successful people put family and relationships to the side. It's a scarier facet of contemporary American culture that our idea of the perfect hostess or host is one who presents an elegant table and a perfectly prepared meal to one who brings over a macaroni casserole or sits with us through the night when someone we love is in medical peril or has died. Kindness -- concern for others -- often has no place in elegant, gracious living, because the latter is about appearances and the former about relationships.
Since it's easy to blast Martha Stewart, how do we remain focused on our own failures of kindness? I return to the youth group setting. We teach it and we model it. Most of the acting out, anger, and frustrations that teenagers evince in those years can be traced back to the behavior of their parents. Our inconsistency to keep our own actions consistent with our own lectures means more often than not "You are the man/woman" as Nathan said to David. Scout, the narrator and daughter of Atticus Finch, had a splendid model of integrity and kindness in her father; let us pray we too may live and inspire kindness in others in a manner similar to Atticus and to the even more gentle and compassionate One who came to save us all.
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Related Illustrations
While driving recently, I passed a couple of tractor-trailer trucks in caravan. Both had the following motto painted on them in large letters: "Be Kind. Be Careful. Be Yourself."
The exhortation to "be kind" is ethical advice no one would disagree with. (The fact that a trucking company would adopt this as a motto is ample evidence of that.) Yet the biblical exhortation to kindness is of a different order than the garden-variety, commonsense idea of kindness. It is to aspire to imitate the steadfast love (hesed) of God.
-- Carlos Wilton
* * * * *
"Be kind, for everyone you meet is fighting a great battle."
-- Philo of Alexandria
* * * * *
"To know and to serve God, of course, is why we're here, a clear truth, that, like the nose on your face, is near at hand and easily discernible but can make you dizzy if you try to focus on it hard. But a little faith will see you through. What else will do except faith in such a cynical, corrupt time?
"When the country goes temporarily to the dogs, cats must learn to be circumspect, walk on fences, sleep in trees, and have faith that all this woofing is not the last word.
"What is the last word, then? Gentleness is everywhere in daily life, a sign that faith rules through ordinary things: through cooking and small talk, through storytelling, making love, fishing, tending animals and sweet corn and flowers, through sports, music and books, raising kids -- all the places where the gravy soaks in and grace shines through."
-- Garrison Keillor, "The Meaning of Life," in We Are Still Married (New York: Viking, 1989).
* * * * *
"Once in a while we meet a gentle person. Gentleness is a virtue hard to find in a society that admires toughness and roughness. We are encouraged to get things done and to get them done fast, even when people get hurt in the process. Success, accomplishment, and productivity count. But the cost is high. There is no place for gentleness in such a milieu.
"Gentle is the one who does 'not break the crushed reed, or snuff the faltering wick' (Matthew 12:20). Gentle is the one who is attentive to the strengths and weaknesses of the other and enjoys being together more than accomplishing something. A gentle person treads lightly, listens carefully, looks tenderly, and touches with reverence. A gentle person knows that true growth requires nurture, not force. Let's dress ourselves with gentleness. In our tough and often unbending world our gentleness can be a vivid reminder of the presence of God among us."
-- Henri Nouwen, Bread for the Journey (New York: Harper Collins, 1997).
* * * * *
"We are made kind by being kind."
-- Eric Hoffer
* * * * *
"One day Gandhi stepped aboard a train as it started to move, and one of his shoes slipped off and dropped on the tracks. Unable to retrieve it, he calmly took off his other shoe and threw it back along the track to land close to the first. When an amazed passenger asked why he had done that, Gandhi smiled and said, 'The poor man who finds the shoe lying on the track will now have a pair he can use.' With the eyes of his imagination, Gandhi saw a man with bare feet, saw him coming across a lone shoe and desperately searching for the other, and saw the disappointment on his face when he didn't find it; seeing these things, Gandhi did what he could to help."
-- Donald McCullough, Say Please, Say Thank You: The Respect We Owe One Another (New York: Putnam, 1998).
* * * * *
"Kindness is in our power, even when fondness is not."
-- Samuel Johnson
* * * * *
"Kindness is the ability to love people more than they deserve."
-- Anonymous
* * * * *
"Church members to distribute $100 bills to needy"
by Brad Schrade
"More than a dozen churches in Middle Tennessee yesterday sent their congregants away with crisp $100 bills to spread through the community in acts of kindness over this holiday season.
"All told, $50,000 was distributed to be given -- no strings attached -- to strangers who may be in need or neighbors who are down on their luck.
" 'The point of this is to plant seeds of kindness,' said Rubel Shelly, minister at Woodmont Hills Church of Christ, who distributed the bills to his members.
"The local effort is funded by an anonymous businessman who gave the money to Woodmont Hills, which is administering the program that involves about 15 churches of various denominations.
"The idea started last year with the same anonymous donor giving $50,000, but the idea grew out of a similar effort at a California church. It was inspired by the movie Pay It Forward and by the biblical parable about investing one's talents to do good in the world....
The program has a Web site at www.seedsofkindness.com...."
-- The Tennessean, Monday, November 25, 2002
* * * * *
"There are three things that are important in human life. The first is to be kind. The second is to be kind. The third is to be kind."
-- Novelist Henry James, giving advice to his nephew William
* * * * *
"To handle yourself, use your head. To handle others, use your heart."
-- Eleanor Roosevelt
* * * * *
"The older you get the more you realize that kindness is synonymous with happiness."
-- Lionel Barrymore
* * * * *
"I love thee for the heart that's kind -- Not for the knowledge in thy mind."
-- W. H. Davies, "Sweet Stay-at-Home," Foliage (1913)
* * * * *
"True kindness presupposes the faculty of imagining as one's own the suffering and joy of others."
-- Andre Gide, Portraits and Aphorisms (1903)
* * * * *
"One looks back with appreciation to the brilliant teachers, but with gratitude to those who touched our human feelings. The curriculum is so much necessary raw material, but warmth is the vital element for the growing plant and for the soul of the child."
-- Attributed to Carl Gustav Jung
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Worship Resources
by George Reed
OPENING
Music
Hymns
"Now Thank We All Our God." Words: Martin Rinkart, 1663; trans. Catherine Winkworth, 1858; music: Johann Cruger, 1647; harm. by Felix Mendelssohn, 1840. Public domain. As found in UMH 102; Hymnal '82 396, 397; LBOW 533, 534; TPH 555; TNNBH 330.
"How Can We Name a Love." Words: Brian Wren, 1973; music: trad. English melody, adapt. by Franklin L. Sheppard, 1915. Words (c) 1975 Hope Publishing Co. As found in UMH 111.
"There's a Wideness in God's Mercy." Words: Frederick W. Faber, 1854; music: Lizzie S. Tourjee, 1877, harm. by Charles H. Webb, 1988. Harm. (c) 1989 The United Methodist Publishing House. As found in UMH 121; LBOW 290; TPH 298.
Songs
"Sweet, Sweet Spirit." Words and music: Doris Akers. (c) 1962, renewed 1970 Manna Music, Inc. As found in CCB 7.
"The Steadfast Love of the Lord." Words: Edith McNeill; music: Edith McNeill; arr. by J. Michael Bryan. (c) 1974 Celebration. As found in CCB# 28.
CALL TO WORSHIP
Leader: Happy are those who do not follow the advice of the wicked,
People: or take the path that sinners tread,
Leader: or sit in the seat of scoffers;
People: but their delight is in the law of God.
Leader: God watches over the way of the righteous,
People: but the way of the wicked will perish.
or
Leader: The way of God is the way of kindness.
People: Compassion fills the heart of our God.
Leader: We are God's people, God's image,
People: let us also be filled with kindness and love.
COLLECT/OPENING PRAYER
O God, who sheds mercy to generations yet unborn: Grant that we, your children and likeness, may also be filled with compassion and care for all creation; through Jesus Christ our Lord. Amen.
or
God, you are the source of all goodness, all grace, and all kindness. Draw us into your presence this morning that we may be renewed in the power of the Spirit and sent out to share your love and kindness with others. Amen.
Response Music
Hymns
"Dear Jesus, in Whose Life I See." Words: John Hunter, 1889; music: Katholisches Gesangbuch, 1774; adapt. from Metrical Psalter, 1855. Public domain. As found in UMH 468.
"Break Thou the Bread of Life." Words: Mary A Lathbury, 1877; music: William F. Shewink, 1877. Public domain. As found in UMH 599; LBOW 235; TPH 239; AAHH 334; TNNBH 295.
"Thy Word Is a Lamp." Words: Amy Grant, 1984; music: Michael W. Smith, 1984, arr. by Keith Phillips. (c) 1984 Meadowgreen Music Co/ Bug and Bear Music. As found in UMH 601.
"We Meet You, O Christ." Words: Fred Kaan, 1966; music: Carl F. Schalk, 1987. Words (c) 1968 Hope Publishing Co; music (c) 1989 The United Methodist Publishing House. As found in UMH 257; TPH 311.
"Softly and Tenderly Jesus Is Calling." Words: Will L. Thompson, 1880; music: Will L. Thompson, 1880. Public domain. As found in UMH 348; AAHH 347; TNNBH 168.
"Jesu, Jesu." Words: Tom Colvin, 1969; music: Ghana folk song, arr. by Tom Colvin, 1969, harm. by Charles H. Webb, 1988. (c) 1969, 1989 Hope Publishing Co. As found in UMH 432; Hymnal '82 602; TPH 367.
Songs
"Your Loving Kindness Is Better than Life." Words: Based on Psalm 63:3, 4; music: Hugh Mitchell. Chorus (c) 1956 and verses (c) 1962 Singspiration Music. As found in CCB 26.
"I Am Loved." Words: William J. Gaither and Gloria Gather; music: William J. Gaither. (c) 1978 William J. Gaither. As found in CCB 80.
"Shalom to You." Words: Elise S. Eslinger; music: trad. Spanish melody, harm. from Celebremos. Words (c) 1983 The United Methodist Publishing House. As found in CCB 98.
PRAYERS OF CONFESSION/PARDON
Leader: Let us bow our hearts before the Love that knows no end and confess our true condition.
People: We confess, O God, that we are not filled with compassion and grace but rather with vengeance and pettiness. When we see our brother or sister stumble, we are more concerned with their getting "what they deserve" than with granting them forgiveness and an opportunity to renew their life.
When we look at the good fortune of others, we are more likely to be jealous than we to be thankful for their success. When people are treated unjustly, if we are outraged it is more likely because we fear we may suffer the same fate rather than because they have met injustice.
Grant us the grace and time to amend our lives and the power of your Spirit to live as your image. Amen.
Leader: God is gracious to us sinners. We are granted forgiveness and grace. Share that grace with others as you meet them in life this week.
GENERAL PRAYERS AND LITANIES
Source of all wisdom and grace, we acknowledge you as our God and offer our worship and praise to you. All creation and all good gifts come from you. You are the fountain of life and ocean of unfathomable wisdom. To you we offer our praises and adoration.
(The following paragraph is most suitable if a prayer of confession will not be used elsewhere.)
We confess, O God, that we have sought for wisdom in many places other than in you. Our bookstores are filled with self-help books and we are as far from being whole as ever. We follow fads instead of wisdom. We seek advantage over others. Call us back again to that image of yourself that you intended us to bear when you created us. By the power of your Spirit enable us to grow into the kind of children you have always known we could become.
We give you thanks for your kindness to us and for all the wonders of creation. You move among us in many ways bringing blessing and grace. Your love for us in beyond our understanding and your patience with us beyond belief.
(Other specific thanksgiving may be offered.)
We are aware that there are many needs in our world. There are folks without the very basics that are needed for life. There are those who are suffer in body, mind or spirit. There are those oppressed by others and some who are oppressed by their own minds. We lift them into the light of your presence and pray that as you hold them in your love, we might also hold them in love.
(Other petitions may be offered.)
Grant that all our prayers may be in the Spirit of our Lord Jesus who taught us to pray together saying, "Our Father...."
Hymnal and Songbook Abbreviations
UMH: United Methodist Hymnal
Hymnal '82: The Hymnal 1982, The Episcopal Church
LBOW: Lutheran Book of Worship
TPH: The Presbyterian Hymnal
AAHH: African American Heritage Hymnal
TNNBH: The New National Baptist Hymnal
CCB: Cokesbury Chorus Book
PMMCH3: Praise. Maranatha! Music Chorus Book, Expanded 3rd Edition
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A Children's Sermon
A Harvest of Peace
James 3:13-18
by Wesley T. Runk
Text: "And the harvest of righteousness is sown in peace by those who make peace." (v. 18)
Object: some onion starts and some potatoes used for planting
Good morning, boys and girls. I wonder if you ever think about peace? Do you know about peace? Do you know what peace is? (let them answer) Peace is something that all of us want, but how do we get peace? Can you buy peace or find it somewhere if it is hidden? Where do we get the peace that all of us want? We hate war. Why should people go out and make war that hurts and kills other people? That is really terrible. We all want peace, but we do not seem to know how to make peace.
I wonder if the Bible has an answer? Do you think that the Bible knows how to make peace? (let them answer) You are right if you believe that the Bible is the one source that can go to find out how to make peace. The Bible says that peace comes when people who want peace work for peace. Let's see if I can make this any easier.
I have some different things with me this morning that will help you learn what the Bible is trying to teach. I wanted to grow some onions and some potatoes. I needed something to start my onions and my potatoes, so I went to a store and they gave me these things that I have in my hands to plant in the ground. They told me that I should plant a row of these things (show the onion starts) and I would have onions. They also told me that I should plant these things (show the potato starts) and I would have potatoes. I will not get corn, green beans, or celery with what I have planted, but I will get onions and potatoes. That is what I want and that is what I will have if I plant the right things in the right rows.
Do we want peace? Then we must work for peace. We must put the right things into our world if we are going to have the right things come out. You can't have peace if you hate. You can't have peace if you are jealous of your friends. When you hate, you get hate, and when you are jealous, you get jealousy. I know people who are selfish. People don't like them, and they will not share with selfish people. We get back from other people what we give them.
I want onions, and I have to plant onions. I want potatoes, and I have to plant potatoes. I want peace, and I must do the things that make peace. I must love others, forgive others, and share with others, and I will have peace. We all want peace, but we must work for it every day of our lives and work with others, so that we have peace in our world, and in our homes. Will you all do that? Wonderful! God bless you.
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The Immediate Word, September 21, 2003 issue.
Copyright 2003 by CSS Publishing Company, Inc., Lima, Ohio.
All rights reserved. Subscribers to The Immediate Word service may print and use this material as it was intended in sermons and in worship and classroom settings only. No additional permission is required from the publisher for such use by subscribers only. Inquiries should be addressed to permissions@csspub.com or to Permissions, CSS Publishing Company, Inc., P.O. Box 4503, Lima, Ohio 45802-4503.
We are heartened when mayors, business leaders, teachers, and parents discover that small acts of kindness are more effective in changing the behavior of others than are coercion and duress. This can be a hard lesson for impatient Americans to learn, especially in a self-oriented and increasingly polarized society. In this issue of The Immediate Word, Carlos Wilton points out that the Hebrew word hesed (which so often in the Old Testament refers to God's "loving kindness" or faithfulness) in the First Reading of the lectionary for September 21 is a central characteristic of the capable and faithful woman. It is a virtue to be inculcated.
Team members also assert the importance of hesed for healthy relationships on the part of men and women alike. They identify a number of examples from contemporary life -- some in which kindness has diminished or otherwise needs to be rekindled and others that demonstrate the power of kindness. Illustrations and worship resources that relate to this theme are included, along with a children's sermon on the Second Reading.
Contents
What Kindness Teaches
Team Comments
Related Illustrations
Worship Resources
Children's Sermon
WHAT KINDNESS TEACHES
by Carlos Wilton
Proverbs 31:10-31
The Message on a Postcard
"She opens her mouth with wisdom, and the teaching of kindness is on her tongue" (Proverbs 31:26).
The Hebrew word translated here as "kindness" is hesed -- the same rich word often translated "steadfast love" when it refers to God. The capable wife of Proverbs teaches hesed. The word "teaching" can also be translated "instruction." Oftentimes, as it's used in the Hebrew (though not always), it refers to instruction in the law -- law in the broadest sense, meaning not just the literal meaning of a specific ordinance but also the rich heritage of midrashic interpretation. The true teacher of God's law conveys not only the legal particulars but also a deep love of the law. The students of such a faithful teacher, like the rabbinical students celebrated in today's psalm, will find that "their delight is in the law of the Lord, and on his law they meditate day and night" (Psalm 1:2).
Perhaps a tie-in to current news would be the recent flap over the Ten Commandments monument in the Alabama Supreme Court building. State Supreme Court Chief Justice Roy Moore, who has recently been suspended from his duties, is passionately committed to teaching God's law as the foundation for human law -- something the presiding Federal judge, citing separation of church and state, is not allowing to continue. On September 9, Alabama Governor Bob Riley unveiled his own Ten Commandments monument in the State Capitol building. The new plaque -- much smaller than the 5,300 pound monolith Roy Moore had placed in the Supreme Court building -- will be accompanied by representations of the Magna Carta and the Bill of Rights, making it a historical display (thus squeaking by within Federal guidelines that say the Ten Commandments may be taught as history, but not in order to advance religion).
Justice Roy Moore is still not impressed. "To put things around the Ten Commandments and secularize it is to deny the greatness of God," he told a crowd of 1,500 supporters at a fund-raising dinner for his legal defense. Source: http://www.nytimes.com/aponline/national/AP-Ten-Commandments.html
There's an interesting theological issue here, amidst all the farcical legal hair-splitting. How does one teach kindness (or any other virtue, for that matter)? It's easy to say "be ye kind" -- indeed, no one in his or her right mind would disagree with that proposition -- but how do we teach that kind of behavior? Surely not by chiseling "be kind" into a slab of marble.
The anonymous woman in Proverbs has the teaching of kindness "on her tongue," but it's evidently more than mere words that accomplish the teaching. There's something about her very life that teaches kindness. She teaches not only by word but also by example. There are those who believe that our society's problems may be solved by simply teaching everyone the Ten Commandments, but in fact that won't get us very far. There's more that's required: the teaching of kindness. And that can never be communicated by cold stone, only by a warm and Godly heart.
Many of our churches have recently started up a new year of Sunday School. This is a Sunday when we can celebrate the work of the Sunday School from the pulpit: for truly it is a place where "the teaching of kindness" can happen, in ways that are impossible in the public schools or any other civic institution.
Some Words on the Word
Proverbs 31:10-31 is a remarkable piece of literature. Not only is it an extended discourse that differs from the one-liners that make up a good part of the rest of the book, in the original Hebrew it is also an acrostic poem (an acrostic is one in which each line begins with the subsequent letter of the alphabet).
Earlier in Proverbs, we have heard how the author praises wisdom, personified as a woman (1:20-33; 3:13-18; 8:1-9:6). Now, the figure of wisdom-as-woman takes particular human form, in this closing paean to "a capable wife." In 31:10 this capable woman is referred to as "more precious than jewels"; the same description is used in 3:15 to refer to wisdom. As Carol Fontaine points out in The Women's Bible Commentary: "Just as Woman Wisdom began the book with promises of wealth, happiness, honor, and long life as the reward for following her prudent teachings, the Woman of Worth and her fine household represent the concrete fulfillment of those earlier promises and so make a fitting conclusion to the work" (Louisville: Westminster John Knox, 1992, p. 152).
The word "wife" here has attracted some negative attention from modern commentators who are concerned with gender equality. In fact, as Fontaine points out, the term for "woman" and "wife" is the same in Hebrew (p. 151), and so not too much should be made of this woman's wifely status. What she does is simply what most women of that culture were expected to do. She is just particularly adept at living the life of practical wisdom.
This text should not be read in such a way as to assume that womanly virtue is limited to those working as homemakers; a deeper reading of the text reveals that the virtues of this woman have to do with her inner character, not with her particular tasks. She is a teacher not only of wisdom, but also of kindness (hesed, 31:26). Her talents are by no means limited to household work, in any event; this woman is a business entrepreneur and agricultural manager as well as a homemaker and mother. She is at ease making management decisions. She is evidently very well-off financially, having a staff of servants to supervise. That she and her husband fulfill traditional gender roles in Hebrew society (she in the home and marketplace, he governing with his fellow elders at the city gate) should come as no surprise, but neither should we assume that those traditional roles are prescriptive for today's society. This passage has more to do with character than specific roles or activities.
William Willimon raises a concern that this text could be misused to justify workaholism on the part of women who wear themselves out trying to "have it all." (The old, cloying television commercial comes to mind in this regard: the woman comes home from work, dressed in a business suit, and prances up to her husband, singing, "I can bring home the bacon, fry it up in a pan, and never let you forget I'm a woman!") Here are Willimon's comments:
In most congregations there are always some people, and often they seem to be women, who shoulder far too much responsibility. We praise them for their hard work, their dedication to their families and to the church. We find that we call on them repeatedly whenever there is tough work to be done. But ought we to do so? When does our praise of them for their hard work become a subtle form of abuse? ... While her gifts are remarkable, I am still hesitant to join this tough woman's children and husband who rise up to call her happy and blessed. I have known too many people, both women and men, who know no limits on their activity, who take upon their backs too much responsibility for making their families work, who say yes to every request for help, and who eventually pay dearly for what the rest of us hail as remarkable capability." (William H. Willimon on Proverbs 31:10-31, in The Lectionary Commentary, ed. Roger E. Van Harn [Grand Rapids: Eerdmans, 2001], p. 287)
One of the chief virtues this wise woman demonstrates is that of hesed ("kindness," but translated elsewhere as "steadfast love"). The teaching of hesed is on her tongue, but she very evidently teaches it not only in word, but also in deed. The term hesed is notoriously untranslatable. "Each of the English translational options -- love, loyalty, kindness, and even the less viable mercy -- highlights some of these characteristics of hesed while severely underplaying others ..." (Katharine Doob Sakenfeld, in The Anchor Bible Dictionary, ed. D. N. Freedman [New York: Doubleday, 1996], 4:378). Almost always the term is used to describe the behavior of the more powerful person in a covenant relationship toward the less powerful. The capable woman in Proverbs has a number of people over whom she has authority -- her servants and children -- and she is also generous to the needy (v. 20), so there is no shortage of candidates for her covenantal kindness.
Walter Brueggemann defines hesed as "the fulfillment of covenant obligations, based on a previously made pledge, to a partner in covenant by acting in ways consistent with loyalty and solidarity" (Reverberations of Faith: A Theological Handbook of Old Testament Themes [Louisville: Westminster John Knox, 1992], p. 127). This view of covenant faithfulness, Brueggemann continues, "is powerfully contrasted with the practice of the late modern world where everything is reduced to commoditization and advantage. In such a world, no durable fidelities sustain public life. The contemporary tension between a tradition of covenantal fidelity and electronic commoditization is thus as acute as can be imagined."
A Map of the Message
A sermon on this text could begin with a reference to the news story about the removal of the Ten Commandments monument from the Alabama Supreme Court building, and the governor's subsequent action to replace it with a more legally permissible version (see "The Message on a Postcard," above). The question all this raises is: How do we teach and encourage virtue? Do we teach virtue -- in this particular case, kindness -- by commanding it? Or do we teach it best by example?
The wise woman of Proverbs 31 is an excellent example of kindness. In spending so many verses extolling her excellent qualities, the author is holding her up as a paragon. One can only assume that those who are the recipients of her covenantal kindness -- her children whom she clothes in crimson (v. 21), and her servant-girls whose work she directs (v. 15) -- learn, from her example, how to pass kindness on to others.
There's no doubt our world could use a lot more kindness. So many of our daily human interactions are devoid of basic kindness that when someone ventures a genuine smile or thoughtful remark (beyond the meaningless "Have a nice day" of the store clerk, that is), it seems remarkable to us. So hungry are we for "the milk of human kindness" that Christian physician M. Scott Peck has found an audience for an entire book decrying the lack of basic civility: A World Waiting To Be Born: Civility Rediscovered (New York: Bantam, 1994). The 2000 film, Pay It Forward, with Kevin Bacon and Helen Hunt -- in which Hollywood treated as a revolutionary new idea the proposition that kindness is a good thing -- was a surprise box office sensation: http://payitforward.warnerbros.com/Pay_It_Forward/
There's even a charitable foundation whose sole purpose is to promote "random acts of kindness": http://www.actsofkindness.org/ All this is positive, but perhaps this proliferation of books and movies and even websites is indicative of the fact that the scarcity of true kindness in our culture is far-reaching and deeply-felt.
The wise woman of Proverbs is a teacher of kindness, but what is it, ultimately, that her kindness teaches? It is that God is kind. Her hesed is but a reflection of the greater hesed of the one who created and sustains all things. She is able to keep covenant with others because her God has kept covenant with her. When we practice kindness -- even in the most simple and ordinary ways -- we are being faithful.
One homiletical strategy could be to contrast the figure of the wise woman from Proverbs 31 with our contemporary society's diva of domesticity, Martha Stewart. "I don't run out of ideas," insists Martha Stewart; "I run out of time."
Anyone who has followed Martha's television program or magazine or publishing empire knows that steely determination of hers: to get it exactly right, to create what she calls "a good thing." For her fans, Martha Stewart is the unrivaled queen of running a household.
Martha, for example, is the one who advises "dressing up good-quality paper napkins with an embosser. It takes only a moment to make an imprint of your initials or a simple symbol in the corner of each napkin, and they'll be impressive enough for company." Martha's also the one who suggests hot-gluing freshly-cut ivy leaves to the edges of a tablecloth for decoration ("Ask Martha," in the Detroit News, 8/3/96, on the World Wide Web).
Martha's also the one who shared with readers of New York magazine the proper etiquette (as she sees it) for shoveling snow (In the immortal words of Dave Barry, "I am not making this up ..."): "Always leave an inch of snow so it looks nice and white. Aesthetics are very important in snow removal" ("Life" section, USA Today, Wednesday, January 17, 1996).
Martha's current difficulties with the Securities and Exchange Commission aside, she continues to be many Americans' ideal of how to manage a household. There's one thing that's largely missing, though, from her media-savvy lessons in household management: any hint of how to nurture and improve the lives of those living in the house (in fact, from most of her broadcasts, the casual viewer would assume she lives alone; the others for whom she prepares her elaborate celebrations are clearly guests). When it comes to window treatments, party invitations and gourmet cookery, Martha has no equal; but who would claim of her that "the teaching of kindness is on her tongue"?
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Team Comments
George Murphy responds: I suspect that some men, hearing this text about the "capable wife" and having "kindness" emphasized, may think that "kindness" is a distinctively "womanly" virtue, to be exercised primarily in the home. There is unfortunately an idea that functioning in the "real world" -- that of business, politics, and other affairs thought of as "manly" -- requires that one be unkind. After all, we all know that "it's a dog-eat-dog world," "a jungle," etc., out there.
But that kind of division is far too simplistic. While the description of the capable woman in Proverbs is set in a context of traditional gender roles, what is really emphasized about the woman is simply that she is capable. She is the manager of the household and "sees that her merchandise is profitable." From the description we're given, it's not much of a stretch to say that she would be capable in any area of work. On the other hand, what is learned in the home -- including kindness -- ought to be applicable in the real world. And if kindness doesn't seem relevant there, maybe there's something wrong with the way the real world is being run.
At a deeper level, the word translated "kindness," hesed, is -- as Carlos points out -- widely used in other places in the Hebrew scriptures, sometimes translated in other ways. (I don't have the detailed reference at hand, but this word is so important that an entire book has been written about it with Germanic thoroughness, Das Wort Hesed.) It is especially a characteristic of God, and in Psalm 136 "his hesed -- his mercy, his steadfast love -- endures forever" is a refrain that accompanies the descriptions of everything that the Lord has done and continues to do from creation through the history of salvation to the present day. "Kindness" is not a single English word that can describe this characteristic of God, but it's part of the English group of words that needs to be used to convey this concept.
In the real world it isn't always easy to be kind. Sometimes it requires a kind of tough love -- as when we're called to tell people the blunt truth about themselves or their situation. But this can be done with an attitude of kindness, even when the truth is painful. And when the truth is not going to help anybody, the kindest thing may be to remain silent: Your friend probably doesn't have to know what your other friend said about him.
The competitive character of American business and sports creates a climate in which kindness often seems irrelevant. I think that we can be competitive without being nasty. Maybe there's no way to tackle a ball carrier in a kind way, but the trash talking that often accompanies such action isn't necessary, and I'm glad that in the National Football League at least some attempts are made to penalize "taunting" and other such activities.
Maybe that will seem unrealistic to some sports fans, but it is possible to show respect for opponents even while they are opponents. It used to be called "sportsmanship." I recall a baseball game in Baltimore's old Memorial Stadium when the Orioles (who at that time were very good) were playing the New York Yankees. (Every baseball fan knows that if you're not a Yankees fan, your favorite team is probably the one that's playing the Yankees!) This was near the end of the career of the great Yankees slugger Mickey Mantle. His legs were shot at that point and he wasn't playing every day. He hadn't started this game but in the late innings, at a critical point, he was sent in as a pinch hitter. As he walked slowly to the plate the whole stadium full of Orioles fans stood and applauded. And one man standing next to me turned to his friend and said, "What are we cheering for? This guy could kill us!"
There is plenty of nastiness in the world, but sometimes we do see kindness and respect pop up. One of the things we need to do is simply to nurture kindness when it does appear.
Carter Shelley responds: The material on kindness causes me to wonder exactly what are we teaching our children these days. Many years ago when I was an associate minister, with youth ministry as one of my duties, I was struck by how often parents wanted the youth group church program to fix the areas of concern the parents felt their children needed addressing. As adolescents strive to gain independence from their parents and do not want to heed their advice or warnings, it's understandable that parents seek church leaders and volunteers to take up the slack. Areas of concern cited by parents always revolved around sex, drugs, alcohol, and use of the car. Never did I have a well-meaning, loving parent cite kindness or any other positive relational virtue as something they wanted their kids to learn. Yet the teaching of kindness in the home from toddler age on can completely shift the character of a human being when it comes to bullies on the playground, cruel, cutting remarks and slights in middle school, and openness and receptivity to people of other ethnic and social backgrounds in high school. Those who are taught to be kind, and who grasp the essential importance of caring about others, are a blessing and have been blessed. Atticus Finch in To Kill a Mockingbird comes to mind as a gentle, strong, brave, person of great character and faith.
Thank you for your many positive and sensitive remarks with reference to the Proverbs section on the virtuous woman/wife. I too saw the positive side of this text as an affirmation of women of initiative and hard work, who are allowed to actively participate in the household's economy and in the possibilities of entrepreneurialism, etc., and to glean and receive respect for her efforts. I also greatly appreciate your caveat that this text not be understood as a way to praise only hardworking, self-sacrificing homemakers.
While Proverbs seems to represent the human voice more than the divine, this text in particular can be misused to encourage women to overdo more than many already are. There used to be a glamorized Madison Avenue twentieth-century version of this ideal: the Aviance woman who sang, "I can bring home the bacon, fry it up in a pan, and never let you forget you're a man."
While I have been dismayed by the public glee over Martha Stewart's financial misdeeds (because it seems that the fall from public grace of successful women is greeted with more relish than is the fall of successful men), I have never had any desire to emulate her perfectionism in any way. In fact, in her pre-stock-scam days, I came close to buying a book titled Martha Stewart Makes Water, the implication being that she is so perfect she can accomplish miracles even Jesus couldn't (or wouldn't) manage. Anyway, as her bottom line suggests, many women do find Martha Stewart's good living example meaningful and an enviable goal. I greatly appreciate the way you have linked her example to the probable dangers we face when we strive for such unattainable and superficial goals. In some ways, Stewart's life serves as the antithesis of the kindness theme you pursue this week. Even before her financial debacle, Stewart was not known as someone who was kind to her staff or gave time to her family. She is not unique in this way. Many ambitious and successful people put family and relationships to the side. It's a scarier facet of contemporary American culture that our idea of the perfect hostess or host is one who presents an elegant table and a perfectly prepared meal to one who brings over a macaroni casserole or sits with us through the night when someone we love is in medical peril or has died. Kindness -- concern for others -- often has no place in elegant, gracious living, because the latter is about appearances and the former about relationships.
Since it's easy to blast Martha Stewart, how do we remain focused on our own failures of kindness? I return to the youth group setting. We teach it and we model it. Most of the acting out, anger, and frustrations that teenagers evince in those years can be traced back to the behavior of their parents. Our inconsistency to keep our own actions consistent with our own lectures means more often than not "You are the man/woman" as Nathan said to David. Scout, the narrator and daughter of Atticus Finch, had a splendid model of integrity and kindness in her father; let us pray we too may live and inspire kindness in others in a manner similar to Atticus and to the even more gentle and compassionate One who came to save us all.
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Related Illustrations
While driving recently, I passed a couple of tractor-trailer trucks in caravan. Both had the following motto painted on them in large letters: "Be Kind. Be Careful. Be Yourself."
The exhortation to "be kind" is ethical advice no one would disagree with. (The fact that a trucking company would adopt this as a motto is ample evidence of that.) Yet the biblical exhortation to kindness is of a different order than the garden-variety, commonsense idea of kindness. It is to aspire to imitate the steadfast love (hesed) of God.
-- Carlos Wilton
* * * * *
"Be kind, for everyone you meet is fighting a great battle."
-- Philo of Alexandria
* * * * *
"To know and to serve God, of course, is why we're here, a clear truth, that, like the nose on your face, is near at hand and easily discernible but can make you dizzy if you try to focus on it hard. But a little faith will see you through. What else will do except faith in such a cynical, corrupt time?
"When the country goes temporarily to the dogs, cats must learn to be circumspect, walk on fences, sleep in trees, and have faith that all this woofing is not the last word.
"What is the last word, then? Gentleness is everywhere in daily life, a sign that faith rules through ordinary things: through cooking and small talk, through storytelling, making love, fishing, tending animals and sweet corn and flowers, through sports, music and books, raising kids -- all the places where the gravy soaks in and grace shines through."
-- Garrison Keillor, "The Meaning of Life," in We Are Still Married (New York: Viking, 1989).
* * * * *
"Once in a while we meet a gentle person. Gentleness is a virtue hard to find in a society that admires toughness and roughness. We are encouraged to get things done and to get them done fast, even when people get hurt in the process. Success, accomplishment, and productivity count. But the cost is high. There is no place for gentleness in such a milieu.
"Gentle is the one who does 'not break the crushed reed, or snuff the faltering wick' (Matthew 12:20). Gentle is the one who is attentive to the strengths and weaknesses of the other and enjoys being together more than accomplishing something. A gentle person treads lightly, listens carefully, looks tenderly, and touches with reverence. A gentle person knows that true growth requires nurture, not force. Let's dress ourselves with gentleness. In our tough and often unbending world our gentleness can be a vivid reminder of the presence of God among us."
-- Henri Nouwen, Bread for the Journey (New York: Harper Collins, 1997).
* * * * *
"We are made kind by being kind."
-- Eric Hoffer
* * * * *
"One day Gandhi stepped aboard a train as it started to move, and one of his shoes slipped off and dropped on the tracks. Unable to retrieve it, he calmly took off his other shoe and threw it back along the track to land close to the first. When an amazed passenger asked why he had done that, Gandhi smiled and said, 'The poor man who finds the shoe lying on the track will now have a pair he can use.' With the eyes of his imagination, Gandhi saw a man with bare feet, saw him coming across a lone shoe and desperately searching for the other, and saw the disappointment on his face when he didn't find it; seeing these things, Gandhi did what he could to help."
-- Donald McCullough, Say Please, Say Thank You: The Respect We Owe One Another (New York: Putnam, 1998).
* * * * *
"Kindness is in our power, even when fondness is not."
-- Samuel Johnson
* * * * *
"Kindness is the ability to love people more than they deserve."
-- Anonymous
* * * * *
"Church members to distribute $100 bills to needy"
by Brad Schrade
"More than a dozen churches in Middle Tennessee yesterday sent their congregants away with crisp $100 bills to spread through the community in acts of kindness over this holiday season.
"All told, $50,000 was distributed to be given -- no strings attached -- to strangers who may be in need or neighbors who are down on their luck.
" 'The point of this is to plant seeds of kindness,' said Rubel Shelly, minister at Woodmont Hills Church of Christ, who distributed the bills to his members.
"The local effort is funded by an anonymous businessman who gave the money to Woodmont Hills, which is administering the program that involves about 15 churches of various denominations.
"The idea started last year with the same anonymous donor giving $50,000, but the idea grew out of a similar effort at a California church. It was inspired by the movie Pay It Forward and by the biblical parable about investing one's talents to do good in the world....
The program has a Web site at www.seedsofkindness.com...."
-- The Tennessean, Monday, November 25, 2002
* * * * *
"There are three things that are important in human life. The first is to be kind. The second is to be kind. The third is to be kind."
-- Novelist Henry James, giving advice to his nephew William
* * * * *
"To handle yourself, use your head. To handle others, use your heart."
-- Eleanor Roosevelt
* * * * *
"The older you get the more you realize that kindness is synonymous with happiness."
-- Lionel Barrymore
* * * * *
"I love thee for the heart that's kind -- Not for the knowledge in thy mind."
-- W. H. Davies, "Sweet Stay-at-Home," Foliage (1913)
* * * * *
"True kindness presupposes the faculty of imagining as one's own the suffering and joy of others."
-- Andre Gide, Portraits and Aphorisms (1903)
* * * * *
"One looks back with appreciation to the brilliant teachers, but with gratitude to those who touched our human feelings. The curriculum is so much necessary raw material, but warmth is the vital element for the growing plant and for the soul of the child."
-- Attributed to Carl Gustav Jung
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Worship Resources
by George Reed
OPENING
Music
Hymns
"Now Thank We All Our God." Words: Martin Rinkart, 1663; trans. Catherine Winkworth, 1858; music: Johann Cruger, 1647; harm. by Felix Mendelssohn, 1840. Public domain. As found in UMH 102; Hymnal '82 396, 397; LBOW 533, 534; TPH 555; TNNBH 330.
"How Can We Name a Love." Words: Brian Wren, 1973; music: trad. English melody, adapt. by Franklin L. Sheppard, 1915. Words (c) 1975 Hope Publishing Co. As found in UMH 111.
"There's a Wideness in God's Mercy." Words: Frederick W. Faber, 1854; music: Lizzie S. Tourjee, 1877, harm. by Charles H. Webb, 1988. Harm. (c) 1989 The United Methodist Publishing House. As found in UMH 121; LBOW 290; TPH 298.
Songs
"Sweet, Sweet Spirit." Words and music: Doris Akers. (c) 1962, renewed 1970 Manna Music, Inc. As found in CCB 7.
"The Steadfast Love of the Lord." Words: Edith McNeill; music: Edith McNeill; arr. by J. Michael Bryan. (c) 1974 Celebration. As found in CCB# 28.
CALL TO WORSHIP
Leader: Happy are those who do not follow the advice of the wicked,
People: or take the path that sinners tread,
Leader: or sit in the seat of scoffers;
People: but their delight is in the law of God.
Leader: God watches over the way of the righteous,
People: but the way of the wicked will perish.
or
Leader: The way of God is the way of kindness.
People: Compassion fills the heart of our God.
Leader: We are God's people, God's image,
People: let us also be filled with kindness and love.
COLLECT/OPENING PRAYER
O God, who sheds mercy to generations yet unborn: Grant that we, your children and likeness, may also be filled with compassion and care for all creation; through Jesus Christ our Lord. Amen.
or
God, you are the source of all goodness, all grace, and all kindness. Draw us into your presence this morning that we may be renewed in the power of the Spirit and sent out to share your love and kindness with others. Amen.
Response Music
Hymns
"Dear Jesus, in Whose Life I See." Words: John Hunter, 1889; music: Katholisches Gesangbuch, 1774; adapt. from Metrical Psalter, 1855. Public domain. As found in UMH 468.
"Break Thou the Bread of Life." Words: Mary A Lathbury, 1877; music: William F. Shewink, 1877. Public domain. As found in UMH 599; LBOW 235; TPH 239; AAHH 334; TNNBH 295.
"Thy Word Is a Lamp." Words: Amy Grant, 1984; music: Michael W. Smith, 1984, arr. by Keith Phillips. (c) 1984 Meadowgreen Music Co/ Bug and Bear Music. As found in UMH 601.
"We Meet You, O Christ." Words: Fred Kaan, 1966; music: Carl F. Schalk, 1987. Words (c) 1968 Hope Publishing Co; music (c) 1989 The United Methodist Publishing House. As found in UMH 257; TPH 311.
"Softly and Tenderly Jesus Is Calling." Words: Will L. Thompson, 1880; music: Will L. Thompson, 1880. Public domain. As found in UMH 348; AAHH 347; TNNBH 168.
"Jesu, Jesu." Words: Tom Colvin, 1969; music: Ghana folk song, arr. by Tom Colvin, 1969, harm. by Charles H. Webb, 1988. (c) 1969, 1989 Hope Publishing Co. As found in UMH 432; Hymnal '82 602; TPH 367.
Songs
"Your Loving Kindness Is Better than Life." Words: Based on Psalm 63:3, 4; music: Hugh Mitchell. Chorus (c) 1956 and verses (c) 1962 Singspiration Music. As found in CCB 26.
"I Am Loved." Words: William J. Gaither and Gloria Gather; music: William J. Gaither. (c) 1978 William J. Gaither. As found in CCB 80.
"Shalom to You." Words: Elise S. Eslinger; music: trad. Spanish melody, harm. from Celebremos. Words (c) 1983 The United Methodist Publishing House. As found in CCB 98.
PRAYERS OF CONFESSION/PARDON
Leader: Let us bow our hearts before the Love that knows no end and confess our true condition.
People: We confess, O God, that we are not filled with compassion and grace but rather with vengeance and pettiness. When we see our brother or sister stumble, we are more concerned with their getting "what they deserve" than with granting them forgiveness and an opportunity to renew their life.
When we look at the good fortune of others, we are more likely to be jealous than we to be thankful for their success. When people are treated unjustly, if we are outraged it is more likely because we fear we may suffer the same fate rather than because they have met injustice.
Grant us the grace and time to amend our lives and the power of your Spirit to live as your image. Amen.
Leader: God is gracious to us sinners. We are granted forgiveness and grace. Share that grace with others as you meet them in life this week.
GENERAL PRAYERS AND LITANIES
Source of all wisdom and grace, we acknowledge you as our God and offer our worship and praise to you. All creation and all good gifts come from you. You are the fountain of life and ocean of unfathomable wisdom. To you we offer our praises and adoration.
(The following paragraph is most suitable if a prayer of confession will not be used elsewhere.)
We confess, O God, that we have sought for wisdom in many places other than in you. Our bookstores are filled with self-help books and we are as far from being whole as ever. We follow fads instead of wisdom. We seek advantage over others. Call us back again to that image of yourself that you intended us to bear when you created us. By the power of your Spirit enable us to grow into the kind of children you have always known we could become.
We give you thanks for your kindness to us and for all the wonders of creation. You move among us in many ways bringing blessing and grace. Your love for us in beyond our understanding and your patience with us beyond belief.
(Other specific thanksgiving may be offered.)
We are aware that there are many needs in our world. There are folks without the very basics that are needed for life. There are those who are suffer in body, mind or spirit. There are those oppressed by others and some who are oppressed by their own minds. We lift them into the light of your presence and pray that as you hold them in your love, we might also hold them in love.
(Other petitions may be offered.)
Grant that all our prayers may be in the Spirit of our Lord Jesus who taught us to pray together saying, "Our Father...."
Hymnal and Songbook Abbreviations
UMH: United Methodist Hymnal
Hymnal '82: The Hymnal 1982, The Episcopal Church
LBOW: Lutheran Book of Worship
TPH: The Presbyterian Hymnal
AAHH: African American Heritage Hymnal
TNNBH: The New National Baptist Hymnal
CCB: Cokesbury Chorus Book
PMMCH3: Praise. Maranatha! Music Chorus Book, Expanded 3rd Edition
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A Children's Sermon
A Harvest of Peace
James 3:13-18
by Wesley T. Runk
Text: "And the harvest of righteousness is sown in peace by those who make peace." (v. 18)
Object: some onion starts and some potatoes used for planting
Good morning, boys and girls. I wonder if you ever think about peace? Do you know about peace? Do you know what peace is? (let them answer) Peace is something that all of us want, but how do we get peace? Can you buy peace or find it somewhere if it is hidden? Where do we get the peace that all of us want? We hate war. Why should people go out and make war that hurts and kills other people? That is really terrible. We all want peace, but we do not seem to know how to make peace.
I wonder if the Bible has an answer? Do you think that the Bible knows how to make peace? (let them answer) You are right if you believe that the Bible is the one source that can go to find out how to make peace. The Bible says that peace comes when people who want peace work for peace. Let's see if I can make this any easier.
I have some different things with me this morning that will help you learn what the Bible is trying to teach. I wanted to grow some onions and some potatoes. I needed something to start my onions and my potatoes, so I went to a store and they gave me these things that I have in my hands to plant in the ground. They told me that I should plant a row of these things (show the onion starts) and I would have onions. They also told me that I should plant these things (show the potato starts) and I would have potatoes. I will not get corn, green beans, or celery with what I have planted, but I will get onions and potatoes. That is what I want and that is what I will have if I plant the right things in the right rows.
Do we want peace? Then we must work for peace. We must put the right things into our world if we are going to have the right things come out. You can't have peace if you hate. You can't have peace if you are jealous of your friends. When you hate, you get hate, and when you are jealous, you get jealousy. I know people who are selfish. People don't like them, and they will not share with selfish people. We get back from other people what we give them.
I want onions, and I have to plant onions. I want potatoes, and I have to plant potatoes. I want peace, and I must do the things that make peace. I must love others, forgive others, and share with others, and I will have peace. We all want peace, but we must work for it every day of our lives and work with others, so that we have peace in our world, and in our homes. Will you all do that? Wonderful! God bless you.
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The Immediate Word, September 21, 2003 issue.
Copyright 2003 by CSS Publishing Company, Inc., Lima, Ohio.
All rights reserved. Subscribers to The Immediate Word service may print and use this material as it was intended in sermons and in worship and classroom settings only. No additional permission is required from the publisher for such use by subscribers only. Inquiries should be addressed to permissions@csspub.com or to Permissions, CSS Publishing Company, Inc., P.O. Box 4503, Lima, Ohio 45802-4503.
