Mind Your Thumbs
Stories
Object:
Contents
"Mind Your Thumbs" by Peter Andrew Smith
"Pledge of Allegiance" by C. David McKirachan
* * * * * * * *
Mind Your Thumbs
by Peter Andrew Smith
James 3:1-12
"Jenny, did you write this?" Tony asked.
His daughter looked up from the sofa. "Write what?"
"This text." He held up her cell phone.
"What are you doing with that?" Jenny sat up quickly and pulled out her earbuds. "You have no right looking at my messages, they are private!"
"Ur fat & smell," Tony read from the phone. "Why would you write something like that to Emily?"
"You don't understand," Jenny said reaching for the phone. "It's just a joke. She knows I don't mean it."
Tony pulled the phone away from her. "I noticed you routed the text through one of those websites that let you use a false name."
"I only do that so I can send texts without getting charged for them." Jenny folded her arms. "You were on my case for going over my texts and now you are mad that I found a way to save money? Make up your mind, Dad."
"Saving money is fine," Tony said taking a seat across from her. "What I need you to do is explain why you sent this terrible message to Emily anonymously."
"You wouldn't understand." Jenny slumped down in the chair.
"Try me."
"Why bother?" she said. "You've already decided that I've done something terribly wrong so you may as well just punish me and get it over with."
"Okay." Tony looked at the phone and then her. "No cell phone or internet for a month."
"What?" Jenny threw up her arms. "That's not fair. All I did was send a stupid text."
"Then explain it to me."
"Emily was talking trash about me." Jenny scowled. "She said I was making eyes at Todd and flirting with him. I wasn't doing any of that."
"So she didn't believe you when you told her that?"
Jenny rolled her eyes. "She thinks everyone is out to steal Todd from her."
"Uh-huh." Tony said. "So what did she say to you when you told her you weren't doing any of that?"
Jenny shrugged her shoulders.
"You never talked to her did you?" Tony took a deep breath. "You just went ahead and sent this text."
"Why should I talk to her? She started it by saying those things about me that weren't true."
"Who told you she said those things about you?"
"Some of the girls."
Tony took another deep breath. "Did they hear her or did they hear someone else say that she said those things?"
Jenny didn't answer for a few moments. "I don't know."
"But you went ahead and sent the message to her anyway," Tony said. "Do you realize what you have done?"
"She doesn't know it is from me so no harm done," Jenny said.
Tony shook his head. "You're wrong because there has been lots of harm done. Emily got a mean, cruel message from you, which was bad enough, but you chose to send it anonymously. Would you have said she is fat and smells bad to her face?"
"No." Jenny looked at the floor. "She has always been sensitive about her weight."
"Then explain to me why you texted this message."
"She made me so mad by what she said that I wanted to get back at her."
"Even if she said those things and you don't know that she did," Tony said. "This is the worst possible thing you could have done."
"But she doesn't know it was from me," Jenny protested.
"Right. So Emily will be wondering if everyone she meets is the coward who said those things to her." Tony stared at her. "You are also wrong about no one knowing. You know, I know, and God knows and I think Emily needs to know as well."
Jenny became very still. "You want me to apologize to her?"
"Yes. You need to tell her it was you who sent the message and you need to ask her forgiveness."
"She's going to be upset with me."
"I suspect she will be."
Jenny looked at her father for a moment. "If I make things right with Emily and promise not to do it again can I get my cell and internet back?"
"We'll talk about that after you apologize and after you and I go back over the reading Pastor Carl spoke about on Sunday," Tony said. "Remember when he spoke about James' letter and bridling the tongue?"
"Yes."
"If James had been writing today he would have mentioned thumbs as well." Tony handed Jenny the phone. "Apologize to Emily and then come find me."
Peter Andrew Smith is an ordained minister in the United Church of Canada who currently serves at St. James United Church in Antigonish, Nova Scotia. He is the author of All Things Are Ready (CSS), a book of lectionary-based communion prayers, as well as many stories and articles, which can be found listed at www.peterandrewsmith.com.
Pledge of Allegiance
by C. David McKirachan
Mark 8:27-38
I think it was second grade I began my long history of struggling with authority. About that time I started paying attention to the pledge of allegiance that we said every morning in school. We were supposed to stand up and put our hands over our hearts and "pledge our allegiance to the flag." I refused on the grounds that I was a Christian. I was seven. Go figure...
My parents were called in to address my aberrant behavior. What were they teaching me? They said, "Give us a minute with him." They sat me down and asked me what was up. My parents were like that. They always asked me. They didn't yell. I have no idea where they came up with this kind of system. I don't think they were students of progressive parenting. They probably just figured, asking the kid was easier, at least to begin with.
My explanation was based on Peter's confession of faith. I said very matter of fact, "Jesus Christ is my Lord and Savior. How can I pledge allegiance to the flag?" I don't remember their verbal response, but I do remember they were proud of me. I also remember that I ended up pledging allegiance to the flag. They probably bribed me.
Too often we take all the power out of the inspired statement at Caeserea Philippi, by allowing it to roll by like the Apostles' Creed, mumbled in the middle of worship. I did an exercise on a retreat with elders once. I asked them to write down the Creed without moving their lips. Didn't work. Peter's confession stands like a rock in the midst of all the soup of theological rambling and mushy thinking about this guy named Jesus. It is an experiential affirmation, counterintuitive, proclaiming faith and metaphysical truth. It really doesn't matter what we think or are willing to do about it. It is a recognition of His identity; a classic "ah hah" moment. And then, it demands choice. It shouldn't be mumbled or rolled by. This is who He is. Now, who are we?
Thinking back, I got that in a very childish way then. It made perfect sense to me and I was willing to live by that reality. I wish sometimes that life could be that clear for us, as adults. Maybe that's what the Lord meant, "as a child." But that's another week. I'm glad I remember that moment. I'm glad that my parents were proud of me. And I'm glad that they helped me figure out that I didn't have to be rigid to claim Jesus as Lord.
I bet the bribe had to do with a hot dog with hot relish from of one of those stands. Or maybe Chinese food. Or maybe an extra half hour reading, Just So Stories. I always was an easy mark. Go figure...
C. David McKirachan is pastor of the Presbyterian Church at Shrewsbury in central New Jersey. He also teaches at Monmouth University. McKirachan is the author of I Happened Upon a Miracle and A Year of Wonder (Westminster John Knox).
*****************************************
StoryShare, September 16, 2012, issue.
Copyright 2012 by CSS Publishing Company, Inc., Lima, Ohio.
All rights reserved. Subscribers to the StoryShare service may print and use this material as it was intended in sermons, in worship and classroom settings, in brief devotions, in radio spots, and as newsletter fillers. No additional permission is required from the publisher for such use by subscribers only. Inquiries should be addressed to permissions@csspub.com or to Permissions, CSS Publishing Company, Inc., 5450 N. Dixie Highway, Lima, Ohio 45807.
"Mind Your Thumbs" by Peter Andrew Smith
"Pledge of Allegiance" by C. David McKirachan
* * * * * * * *
Mind Your Thumbs
by Peter Andrew Smith
James 3:1-12
"Jenny, did you write this?" Tony asked.
His daughter looked up from the sofa. "Write what?"
"This text." He held up her cell phone.
"What are you doing with that?" Jenny sat up quickly and pulled out her earbuds. "You have no right looking at my messages, they are private!"
"Ur fat & smell," Tony read from the phone. "Why would you write something like that to Emily?"
"You don't understand," Jenny said reaching for the phone. "It's just a joke. She knows I don't mean it."
Tony pulled the phone away from her. "I noticed you routed the text through one of those websites that let you use a false name."
"I only do that so I can send texts without getting charged for them." Jenny folded her arms. "You were on my case for going over my texts and now you are mad that I found a way to save money? Make up your mind, Dad."
"Saving money is fine," Tony said taking a seat across from her. "What I need you to do is explain why you sent this terrible message to Emily anonymously."
"You wouldn't understand." Jenny slumped down in the chair.
"Try me."
"Why bother?" she said. "You've already decided that I've done something terribly wrong so you may as well just punish me and get it over with."
"Okay." Tony looked at the phone and then her. "No cell phone or internet for a month."
"What?" Jenny threw up her arms. "That's not fair. All I did was send a stupid text."
"Then explain it to me."
"Emily was talking trash about me." Jenny scowled. "She said I was making eyes at Todd and flirting with him. I wasn't doing any of that."
"So she didn't believe you when you told her that?"
Jenny rolled her eyes. "She thinks everyone is out to steal Todd from her."
"Uh-huh." Tony said. "So what did she say to you when you told her you weren't doing any of that?"
Jenny shrugged her shoulders.
"You never talked to her did you?" Tony took a deep breath. "You just went ahead and sent this text."
"Why should I talk to her? She started it by saying those things about me that weren't true."
"Who told you she said those things about you?"
"Some of the girls."
Tony took another deep breath. "Did they hear her or did they hear someone else say that she said those things?"
Jenny didn't answer for a few moments. "I don't know."
"But you went ahead and sent the message to her anyway," Tony said. "Do you realize what you have done?"
"She doesn't know it is from me so no harm done," Jenny said.
Tony shook his head. "You're wrong because there has been lots of harm done. Emily got a mean, cruel message from you, which was bad enough, but you chose to send it anonymously. Would you have said she is fat and smells bad to her face?"
"No." Jenny looked at the floor. "She has always been sensitive about her weight."
"Then explain to me why you texted this message."
"She made me so mad by what she said that I wanted to get back at her."
"Even if she said those things and you don't know that she did," Tony said. "This is the worst possible thing you could have done."
"But she doesn't know it was from me," Jenny protested.
"Right. So Emily will be wondering if everyone she meets is the coward who said those things to her." Tony stared at her. "You are also wrong about no one knowing. You know, I know, and God knows and I think Emily needs to know as well."
Jenny became very still. "You want me to apologize to her?"
"Yes. You need to tell her it was you who sent the message and you need to ask her forgiveness."
"She's going to be upset with me."
"I suspect she will be."
Jenny looked at her father for a moment. "If I make things right with Emily and promise not to do it again can I get my cell and internet back?"
"We'll talk about that after you apologize and after you and I go back over the reading Pastor Carl spoke about on Sunday," Tony said. "Remember when he spoke about James' letter and bridling the tongue?"
"Yes."
"If James had been writing today he would have mentioned thumbs as well." Tony handed Jenny the phone. "Apologize to Emily and then come find me."
Peter Andrew Smith is an ordained minister in the United Church of Canada who currently serves at St. James United Church in Antigonish, Nova Scotia. He is the author of All Things Are Ready (CSS), a book of lectionary-based communion prayers, as well as many stories and articles, which can be found listed at www.peterandrewsmith.com.
Pledge of Allegiance
by C. David McKirachan
Mark 8:27-38
I think it was second grade I began my long history of struggling with authority. About that time I started paying attention to the pledge of allegiance that we said every morning in school. We were supposed to stand up and put our hands over our hearts and "pledge our allegiance to the flag." I refused on the grounds that I was a Christian. I was seven. Go figure...
My parents were called in to address my aberrant behavior. What were they teaching me? They said, "Give us a minute with him." They sat me down and asked me what was up. My parents were like that. They always asked me. They didn't yell. I have no idea where they came up with this kind of system. I don't think they were students of progressive parenting. They probably just figured, asking the kid was easier, at least to begin with.
My explanation was based on Peter's confession of faith. I said very matter of fact, "Jesus Christ is my Lord and Savior. How can I pledge allegiance to the flag?" I don't remember their verbal response, but I do remember they were proud of me. I also remember that I ended up pledging allegiance to the flag. They probably bribed me.
Too often we take all the power out of the inspired statement at Caeserea Philippi, by allowing it to roll by like the Apostles' Creed, mumbled in the middle of worship. I did an exercise on a retreat with elders once. I asked them to write down the Creed without moving their lips. Didn't work. Peter's confession stands like a rock in the midst of all the soup of theological rambling and mushy thinking about this guy named Jesus. It is an experiential affirmation, counterintuitive, proclaiming faith and metaphysical truth. It really doesn't matter what we think or are willing to do about it. It is a recognition of His identity; a classic "ah hah" moment. And then, it demands choice. It shouldn't be mumbled or rolled by. This is who He is. Now, who are we?
Thinking back, I got that in a very childish way then. It made perfect sense to me and I was willing to live by that reality. I wish sometimes that life could be that clear for us, as adults. Maybe that's what the Lord meant, "as a child." But that's another week. I'm glad I remember that moment. I'm glad that my parents were proud of me. And I'm glad that they helped me figure out that I didn't have to be rigid to claim Jesus as Lord.
I bet the bribe had to do with a hot dog with hot relish from of one of those stands. Or maybe Chinese food. Or maybe an extra half hour reading, Just So Stories. I always was an easy mark. Go figure...
C. David McKirachan is pastor of the Presbyterian Church at Shrewsbury in central New Jersey. He also teaches at Monmouth University. McKirachan is the author of I Happened Upon a Miracle and A Year of Wonder (Westminster John Knox).
*****************************************
StoryShare, September 16, 2012, issue.
Copyright 2012 by CSS Publishing Company, Inc., Lima, Ohio.
All rights reserved. Subscribers to the StoryShare service may print and use this material as it was intended in sermons, in worship and classroom settings, in brief devotions, in radio spots, and as newsletter fillers. No additional permission is required from the publisher for such use by subscribers only. Inquiries should be addressed to permissions@csspub.com or to Permissions, CSS Publishing Company, Inc., 5450 N. Dixie Highway, Lima, Ohio 45807.
