The Significant Other
Stories
Contents
“The Significant Other” by Keith Wagner
“But in Thee is Forgiveness” by Keith Wagner
“A House Divided” by John Fitzgerald
The Significant Other
by Keith Wagner
Genesis 3:8-15
I have many images of my mother but the one that stands out the most is the image of my mother and father doing the dishes together. Mom would wash and Dad would dry. I once asked them why this was such a meaningful event for them. My mother replied, “Because your father and I know that you four boys will leave us alone while we do the dishes.”
My parents were married for sixty-seven years. Their roles in the household were mostly traditional, my mother attending to the household tasks of cleaning, cooking and doing laundry, while my father mowed the yard, fixed things around the house and maintained the cars.
Besides doing the dishes together they shared in gardening and most importantly parenting their four sons.
I believe that the story of Adam and Eve in the garden is often misinterpreted. For me their challenge in the garden was an experiment in parenting. God had made them parents of the earth. In other words, they had to cooperate together, attending to the garden.
The words, Bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh” (Gen. 2:23) is a phrase that means “kinship.” God did not create a human who was subservient to man. God created a partner, someone who was equal to man.
In modern times the phrase, “significant other” is replacing helpmate or partner. People have a live-in friend, a person they socialize with more than any other, or a best friend who is there for them in every circumstance. But, when partners recognize that they are in an inequitable relationship, they generally feel uncomfortable, angry or distressed.
Not surprising then that God put “enmity” between the man and the woman. (verse 3:15) Relationships fail because power is not shared. One person ends up carrying most of the domestic and financial burdens for the household or family. When the relationship is not equal one person is being dominated and that can end up in some form of abuse, either psychological or physical.
Adam needed a partner, someone to share his trials and tribulations in the garden, an associate to share in the responsibilities and management of God’s creation. Thus, God created Eve.
One time my wife went on a weekend trip with her mother. I had several church functions to participate in, so it was a good time for her to be away. When she returned she asked me if I missed her. Of course I missed her, but I was also glad she could spend quality time with her mother. She then asked, “What did you miss most about me?” I said, “I found there were moments when I was lost. I didn’t know what to do since you are such a great planner and often think of creative things to do.” I believe we need to appreciate our partners more rather than blaming them when things go wrong, like eating an apple from a snake.
The reference to the couple’s nakedness could be understood metaphorically, meaning that there was a true partnership when two people are free to expose themselves to each other without anything to hide. I also believe the text is saying that by opening ourselves to a partner, we not only become complete but we establish a new identity. In order for a man and woman to create a sound relationship they must be fully bonded to each other and no longer bonded to their parents who raised them.
One time I performed a wedding for a couple and the woman had a young child. During the rehearsal the child kept holding on to his mother. He couldn’t stand for her to be out of his sight for more than a minute. When the bride came down the aisle he was clinging to her, not willing to let go. The child was obviously going through separation anxiety.
The couple was fearful that he might make a scene during the wedding but we continued with the rehearsal. When we practiced the vows and ring exchange the child realized that he was not the center of attention and he held on to the best man. When we practiced the recessional the bride and groom walked arm in arm down the aisle with the child tagging behind. We still didn’t know what would happen the next day. During the wedding the bride was escorted by her father on one side and her child on the other. But, when they arrived at the front of the sanctuary the child let go of his mother and crawled into the lap of his grandpa. Mom clearly made the point that her new husband was number one in her life.
God gives us partners to share life and God’s creation. The most successful relationships are those where the partners are equal. To be alone can be a painful existence, therefore God wants us to enjoy our significant others.
* * *
But in Thee is Forgiveness
by Keith Wagner
Psalm 130
In the book, Putting Forgiveness Into Practice, by Doris Donnelly, there is a story about a young man who laments for a meaningful relationship with his mother. She writes about the time a seven-year-old boy was riding in the back seat of the family car. Suddenly, in a fit of anger, his mother, who was driving, spun around and struck him across the face. Then she yelled at him: "And you! I never wanted you. The only reason I had you was to keep your father. But then he left anyway. I hate you."
That scene branded itself on the boy's memory. During the years that followed, his mother reinforced her feelings toward him by constantly finding fault with him. Years later, that son told a friend: "I can't tell you how many times in the ensuing years I have relived that experience, probably thousands." Then he added: "But recently I put myself in my mother's shoes. There she was, a high school graduate with no money, no job, and a family to support. I realized how lonely and depressed she must have felt. I thought of the anger and the pain that must have been there. And I thought of how much I reminded her of the failure of her young hopes. And so one day I went to visit her and told her that I understood her feelings and that I loved her just the same. She broke down and we wept in each other's arms for what seemed like hours. It was the beginning of a new life for me, for her, and for us."
Like that young man who cried out for his mother’s mercy, the psalmist describes the need for us to “cry out to God” when there is a need to be forgiven. It is sincere and genuine when one “waits for the Lord with all his/her soul.” When we are forgiven we are liberated from those feelings of being unwanted, unloved or ashamed.
God does not want us to give up. “My soul waits for the Lord.” God wants us to persevere, to keep trying because forgiveness will ultimately prevail.
In the book, Chicken Soup for the Mother's Soul, p 29-31, the author tells the story about forgiveness and reconciliation. In Glasgow, Scotland, a young lady, like a lot of teens today, got tired of home and the restraints of her parents. She rejected her family's religious lifestyle and said, "I don't want your God. I give up. I'm leaving!" She left home, deciding to become a woman of the world. Before long, however, she was dejected and unable to find a job, so she took to the streets to sell her body as a prostitute.
The years passed by, her father died, her mother grew older, and she became more and more entrenched in her way of life. No contact was made between her and her mother during these years. The mother, having heard of her daughter's whereabouts, made her way to the skid-row section of the city in search of her daughter. She stopped at each of the rescue missions with a simple request. She would ask if she could post a picture for her long, lost daughter. It was a picture of the smiling, gray-haired mother with a handwritten message at the bottom which read, "I love you still.., come home!"
Some more months went by, and nothing happened. Then one day the daughter wandered into a rescue mission for a needed meal. She sat absent-mindedly listening to the service, all the while letting her eyes wander over to the bulletin board. There she saw the picture and thought, Could that be my mother? She couldn't wait until the service was over. She stood and went to look. It was her mother, and there were those words, "I love you still.., come home!" As she stood in front of the picture, she wept. It was simply too good to be true.
By this time it was night, but she was so touched by the message that she started walking home. By the time she arrived it was early in the morning. She was afraid and made her way timidly, not really knowing what to do. As she knocked, the door flew open on its own. She thought someone must have broken into the house. Concerned for her mother's safety, the young woman ran to the bedroom and found her still sleeping. She shook her mother awake and said, "It's me! It's me! I'm home!" The mother couldn't believe her eyes. She wiped her tears and they fell into each other's arms. The daughter said, "I was so worried! The door was open and I thought someone had broken in. The mother replied gently, "No dear. From the day you left, that door has never been locked."
The troubled mother kept her door unlocked. Her daughter was always welcomed home. Her perseverance ultimately resulted in the return of her daughter. “But in thee, is forgiveness, and therefore thou art revered.”
* * *
A House Divided
by John Fitzgerald
Mark 3:20-35
Abraham Lincoln rose to national prominence on the basis of a speech he made based upon our scripture lesson. In the Gospel of Mark 3:25, Jesus states, “And if a house be divided against itself, that house cannot stand.” This teaching of our Lord is given against religious leaders who claimed Jesus cast out demons because of his affiliation with Satan.
Mr. Lincoln had been an minor figure in national politics until he touched a nerve within the nation concerning a forthcoming split among states about slavery. The House Divided Speech given by Lincoln in 1858 foreshadowed a coming Civil War which erupted just two years later.
Throughout history, the suggestion Lincoln made in his biblical citation has remained true. A deep division within any institution will eventually lead to cracks that cannot be repaired.
The effort to maintain unity in any movement is old as scripture. The pages of our New Testament reflect upon early Christians searching for a oneness in Christ. The opening pages of Acts describe a scene where followers of Jesus were in prayer following his death and resurrection.
Acts 1:13-14 (KJV) reads: “And when they (followers of Jesus) were come in, they went up into an upper room, where abode both Peter, and James, and John, and Andrew, Philip, an Thomas, Bartholomew, and Matthew, James the son of Alphaeus, and Simon Zelotes, and Judas the brother of James. These all continued with one accord in prayer and supplication.” The phrase “one accord in prayer and supplication” explains how God’s spirit could move among these folks to produce powerful results.
The spirit of harmony and unity in prayer led to a spiritual explosion which is described in Acts 2. The question raised is does the same unity in prayer prevail in our church gatherings today?
Far too often the church is torn by dissension and disunity. No effort is made to gather folks in an atmosphere of “one accord” as mentioned in Acts 1.
The same spirit of discord is dominant in all aspects of our current society. Families, politics, schools, churches, and communities are buffeted by a lack of commonality and strong bonds. The warning of Jesus is clear: “A house divided cannot stand.”
The biblical model of “praying in one accord” will go a long way toward returning us to a national sense of shared direction and purpose. At the founding of our country a slogan became incorporated into our Great Seal. This Latin statement serves as a goal towards which we should strive. The statement is e pluribus unum. In English this means, “Out of many, One.”
Drawing from peoples of many nations, America at its best will find one bond and one hope. In doing this we shall avoid the tragedy of being a divided nation which can only meet with failure.
*****************************************
StoryShare, June 10, 2018, issue.
Copyright 2018 by CSS Publishing Company, Inc., Lima, Ohio.
All rights reserved. Subscribers to the StoryShare service may print and use this material as it was intended in sermons, in worship and classroom settings, in brief devotions, in radio spots, and as newsletter fillers. No additional permission is required from the publisher for such use by subscribers only. Inquiries should be addressed to permissions@csspub.com or to Permissions, CSS Publishing Company, Inc., 5450 N. Dixie Highway, Lima, Ohio 45807.
“The Significant Other” by Keith Wagner
“But in Thee is Forgiveness” by Keith Wagner
“A House Divided” by John Fitzgerald
The Significant Other
by Keith Wagner
Genesis 3:8-15
I have many images of my mother but the one that stands out the most is the image of my mother and father doing the dishes together. Mom would wash and Dad would dry. I once asked them why this was such a meaningful event for them. My mother replied, “Because your father and I know that you four boys will leave us alone while we do the dishes.”
My parents were married for sixty-seven years. Their roles in the household were mostly traditional, my mother attending to the household tasks of cleaning, cooking and doing laundry, while my father mowed the yard, fixed things around the house and maintained the cars.
Besides doing the dishes together they shared in gardening and most importantly parenting their four sons.
I believe that the story of Adam and Eve in the garden is often misinterpreted. For me their challenge in the garden was an experiment in parenting. God had made them parents of the earth. In other words, they had to cooperate together, attending to the garden.
The words, Bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh” (Gen. 2:23) is a phrase that means “kinship.” God did not create a human who was subservient to man. God created a partner, someone who was equal to man.
In modern times the phrase, “significant other” is replacing helpmate or partner. People have a live-in friend, a person they socialize with more than any other, or a best friend who is there for them in every circumstance. But, when partners recognize that they are in an inequitable relationship, they generally feel uncomfortable, angry or distressed.
Not surprising then that God put “enmity” between the man and the woman. (verse 3:15) Relationships fail because power is not shared. One person ends up carrying most of the domestic and financial burdens for the household or family. When the relationship is not equal one person is being dominated and that can end up in some form of abuse, either psychological or physical.
Adam needed a partner, someone to share his trials and tribulations in the garden, an associate to share in the responsibilities and management of God’s creation. Thus, God created Eve.
One time my wife went on a weekend trip with her mother. I had several church functions to participate in, so it was a good time for her to be away. When she returned she asked me if I missed her. Of course I missed her, but I was also glad she could spend quality time with her mother. She then asked, “What did you miss most about me?” I said, “I found there were moments when I was lost. I didn’t know what to do since you are such a great planner and often think of creative things to do.” I believe we need to appreciate our partners more rather than blaming them when things go wrong, like eating an apple from a snake.
The reference to the couple’s nakedness could be understood metaphorically, meaning that there was a true partnership when two people are free to expose themselves to each other without anything to hide. I also believe the text is saying that by opening ourselves to a partner, we not only become complete but we establish a new identity. In order for a man and woman to create a sound relationship they must be fully bonded to each other and no longer bonded to their parents who raised them.
One time I performed a wedding for a couple and the woman had a young child. During the rehearsal the child kept holding on to his mother. He couldn’t stand for her to be out of his sight for more than a minute. When the bride came down the aisle he was clinging to her, not willing to let go. The child was obviously going through separation anxiety.
The couple was fearful that he might make a scene during the wedding but we continued with the rehearsal. When we practiced the vows and ring exchange the child realized that he was not the center of attention and he held on to the best man. When we practiced the recessional the bride and groom walked arm in arm down the aisle with the child tagging behind. We still didn’t know what would happen the next day. During the wedding the bride was escorted by her father on one side and her child on the other. But, when they arrived at the front of the sanctuary the child let go of his mother and crawled into the lap of his grandpa. Mom clearly made the point that her new husband was number one in her life.
God gives us partners to share life and God’s creation. The most successful relationships are those where the partners are equal. To be alone can be a painful existence, therefore God wants us to enjoy our significant others.
* * *
But in Thee is Forgiveness
by Keith Wagner
Psalm 130
In the book, Putting Forgiveness Into Practice, by Doris Donnelly, there is a story about a young man who laments for a meaningful relationship with his mother. She writes about the time a seven-year-old boy was riding in the back seat of the family car. Suddenly, in a fit of anger, his mother, who was driving, spun around and struck him across the face. Then she yelled at him: "And you! I never wanted you. The only reason I had you was to keep your father. But then he left anyway. I hate you."
That scene branded itself on the boy's memory. During the years that followed, his mother reinforced her feelings toward him by constantly finding fault with him. Years later, that son told a friend: "I can't tell you how many times in the ensuing years I have relived that experience, probably thousands." Then he added: "But recently I put myself in my mother's shoes. There she was, a high school graduate with no money, no job, and a family to support. I realized how lonely and depressed she must have felt. I thought of the anger and the pain that must have been there. And I thought of how much I reminded her of the failure of her young hopes. And so one day I went to visit her and told her that I understood her feelings and that I loved her just the same. She broke down and we wept in each other's arms for what seemed like hours. It was the beginning of a new life for me, for her, and for us."
Like that young man who cried out for his mother’s mercy, the psalmist describes the need for us to “cry out to God” when there is a need to be forgiven. It is sincere and genuine when one “waits for the Lord with all his/her soul.” When we are forgiven we are liberated from those feelings of being unwanted, unloved or ashamed.
God does not want us to give up. “My soul waits for the Lord.” God wants us to persevere, to keep trying because forgiveness will ultimately prevail.
In the book, Chicken Soup for the Mother's Soul, p 29-31, the author tells the story about forgiveness and reconciliation. In Glasgow, Scotland, a young lady, like a lot of teens today, got tired of home and the restraints of her parents. She rejected her family's religious lifestyle and said, "I don't want your God. I give up. I'm leaving!" She left home, deciding to become a woman of the world. Before long, however, she was dejected and unable to find a job, so she took to the streets to sell her body as a prostitute.
The years passed by, her father died, her mother grew older, and she became more and more entrenched in her way of life. No contact was made between her and her mother during these years. The mother, having heard of her daughter's whereabouts, made her way to the skid-row section of the city in search of her daughter. She stopped at each of the rescue missions with a simple request. She would ask if she could post a picture for her long, lost daughter. It was a picture of the smiling, gray-haired mother with a handwritten message at the bottom which read, "I love you still.., come home!"
Some more months went by, and nothing happened. Then one day the daughter wandered into a rescue mission for a needed meal. She sat absent-mindedly listening to the service, all the while letting her eyes wander over to the bulletin board. There she saw the picture and thought, Could that be my mother? She couldn't wait until the service was over. She stood and went to look. It was her mother, and there were those words, "I love you still.., come home!" As she stood in front of the picture, she wept. It was simply too good to be true.
By this time it was night, but she was so touched by the message that she started walking home. By the time she arrived it was early in the morning. She was afraid and made her way timidly, not really knowing what to do. As she knocked, the door flew open on its own. She thought someone must have broken into the house. Concerned for her mother's safety, the young woman ran to the bedroom and found her still sleeping. She shook her mother awake and said, "It's me! It's me! I'm home!" The mother couldn't believe her eyes. She wiped her tears and they fell into each other's arms. The daughter said, "I was so worried! The door was open and I thought someone had broken in. The mother replied gently, "No dear. From the day you left, that door has never been locked."
The troubled mother kept her door unlocked. Her daughter was always welcomed home. Her perseverance ultimately resulted in the return of her daughter. “But in thee, is forgiveness, and therefore thou art revered.”
* * *
A House Divided
by John Fitzgerald
Mark 3:20-35
Abraham Lincoln rose to national prominence on the basis of a speech he made based upon our scripture lesson. In the Gospel of Mark 3:25, Jesus states, “And if a house be divided against itself, that house cannot stand.” This teaching of our Lord is given against religious leaders who claimed Jesus cast out demons because of his affiliation with Satan.
Mr. Lincoln had been an minor figure in national politics until he touched a nerve within the nation concerning a forthcoming split among states about slavery. The House Divided Speech given by Lincoln in 1858 foreshadowed a coming Civil War which erupted just two years later.
Throughout history, the suggestion Lincoln made in his biblical citation has remained true. A deep division within any institution will eventually lead to cracks that cannot be repaired.
The effort to maintain unity in any movement is old as scripture. The pages of our New Testament reflect upon early Christians searching for a oneness in Christ. The opening pages of Acts describe a scene where followers of Jesus were in prayer following his death and resurrection.
Acts 1:13-14 (KJV) reads: “And when they (followers of Jesus) were come in, they went up into an upper room, where abode both Peter, and James, and John, and Andrew, Philip, an Thomas, Bartholomew, and Matthew, James the son of Alphaeus, and Simon Zelotes, and Judas the brother of James. These all continued with one accord in prayer and supplication.” The phrase “one accord in prayer and supplication” explains how God’s spirit could move among these folks to produce powerful results.
The spirit of harmony and unity in prayer led to a spiritual explosion which is described in Acts 2. The question raised is does the same unity in prayer prevail in our church gatherings today?
Far too often the church is torn by dissension and disunity. No effort is made to gather folks in an atmosphere of “one accord” as mentioned in Acts 1.
The same spirit of discord is dominant in all aspects of our current society. Families, politics, schools, churches, and communities are buffeted by a lack of commonality and strong bonds. The warning of Jesus is clear: “A house divided cannot stand.”
The biblical model of “praying in one accord” will go a long way toward returning us to a national sense of shared direction and purpose. At the founding of our country a slogan became incorporated into our Great Seal. This Latin statement serves as a goal towards which we should strive. The statement is e pluribus unum. In English this means, “Out of many, One.”
Drawing from peoples of many nations, America at its best will find one bond and one hope. In doing this we shall avoid the tragedy of being a divided nation which can only meet with failure.
*****************************************
StoryShare, June 10, 2018, issue.
Copyright 2018 by CSS Publishing Company, Inc., Lima, Ohio.
All rights reserved. Subscribers to the StoryShare service may print and use this material as it was intended in sermons, in worship and classroom settings, in brief devotions, in radio spots, and as newsletter fillers. No additional permission is required from the publisher for such use by subscribers only. Inquiries should be addressed to permissions@csspub.com or to Permissions, CSS Publishing Company, Inc., 5450 N. Dixie Highway, Lima, Ohio 45807.
