True Friends
Sermon
Don't Forget This!
Second Lesson Sermons For Sundays After Pentecost (Last Third) Cycle C
Twice a year for many years, Eric Felack and I have played a grudge golf match against my father and sister. Because we've been like brothers for a long time, it's a family affair with all the predictable pathologies. In other words, any connection between Christian family life and our competition is purely coincidental. There are no concessions, mulligans, do-overs, gimmies, improved lies, or anything else remotely resembling our grace-dominated faith which seems to stay in the clubhouse while we're on the course.
Anyway, I complained to Eric about my dad's gamesmanship during one particular losing effort. If the whistling and jingling coins while I putted weren't bad enough, the tone was set on the first green when my dad asked, "Why do you putt left-handed?" "Because," I explained in vain, "I can't putt right-handed." "Well, I've got news for you," my dad said under breath just loud enough to embarrass me, "You can't putt left-handed either."
After letting me vent for a few minutes, Eric commented, "You know, Bob, I'd give anything to play one more round with my dad. Enjoy him while you've got him."
Certainly, there are some songs that inspire sobriety. Harry Chapin's "Cat In The Cradle" is especially indicting for parents. Barbara Streisand's duet with Neil Diamond called "You Don't Bring Me Flowers" will do the trick for married couples who take each other for granted. "Give Of Your Best to the Master" can cause a wince or two. And then there's Michael Rutherford's "In The Living Years" which was made famous by Mike and the Mechanics in the late 1980s and early 1990s, which should make any listener stop short and re-examine one's relationship with one's parents.
Eric and Michael have helped me to honor my dad -- to prize his place in my life and enjoy him while I've got him. They have helped me to keep the fifth commandment (Exodus 20:12).
So before it's too late, I'm going to spend more time with him. And maybe I'll be able to avoid those guilt-ridden tears that I've seen streaming down too many sons' faces during funerals. Besides, you can't become an adult until you've come to terms with being a child. So here's what I wrote to my dad for Father's Day:
Dear Dad,
I've always liked reading Oswald Chambers' My Utmost for His Highest which contains devotional essays equaled by few. Aside from the Bible, I've probably spent more time with it than any other book except Tommy Armour's How to Play Your Best Golf All the Time (1953).
Reading Chambers' The Highest Good (1938) not too long ago, I was struck by this line: "A friend is one who makes me do my best."
I guess that makes you my best friend because you insisted I never settle for anything less than God's best for me.
You never bought into the "That'll do" modern mantra of mediocrity. And you never accepted my "But-I-Did-My-Best-Dad" rationalizations after less than sterling efforts. I'll never forget how you often said, "Just think if you woke up from an operation and the doctors said, 'Well, I did my best.' You'd think, 'How about doing your job?' "
You come from the old school of hard work, traditional values, clean play, and fidelity to God, wife, children, and country. And I'm praying, as Leslie's dad often says, "The apple doesn't fall far from the tree."
I hold you responsible for my addiction to golf. I resisted it for many years -- it was the rebellious thing to do! -- but now I realize it's good exercise, fun, and a lot cheaper than a psychiatrist. And as I remember you telling Mom, "I've never seen a man cheat on his wife while playing golf."
Speaking of golf, I am still savoring our last round together. We played well together and whipped 'em! And what you said before we teed off on number 6 will stay with me for the rest of my life. You were talking with the other team about a mutual friend in hospice. "It's probably his last stop," you reported before you counseled, "so enjoy this while you can, fellahs!"
That's why I've rededicated myself to enjoying and being with you and Mom.
So before we're temporarily parted as a prelude to our eternal closeness, there's some unfinished business or dreams or whatever -- a favorite word of yours! -- to fulfill. We've got to play Pebble Beach while you can still -- gulp! -- beat me.
Rounds at Oakmont and a few courses in Scotland wouldn't hurt either.
A friend just sent me the best prayer that he has ever heard: "Lord, please make me the kind of person my dog thinks I am."
Here's my prayer: "Lord, please make me the kind of man my dad knows I can be."
And, by the way, I appreciate the hugs that now punctuate our greetings and goodbyes.
Blessings and Love,
Bobby
While I know my dad is not perfect, he has been God's best for me. He has been a true friend. He has incarnated Paul's encouraging letter to his friends:
We always pray for you, asking that our God will make you worthy of his call and will fulfill by his power every good resolve and work of faith, so that the name of our Lord Jesus may be glorified in you, and you in him, according to the grace of our God and the Lord Jesus Christ.
-- 2 Thessalonians 1:11-12
I know some folks haven't had good relationships with their parents. God knows I'm very sorry for them. But that must not stop them from turning to the perfect parent -- the Lord.
That's why I've shared this letter with you. As Eric said, "Enjoy him while you've got him."
That applies to both fathers.
When best-selling author, television personality, professor, preacher, presidential chum and chaplain, salt of the earth, reflected light, and friend of Jesus, Tony Campolo was at Center (May 31, 1998), I had a chance to ask in the spirit of mutual and now-resurrected friend Dick Lane, "So, Tony, how's the Prez?"
Quick as ever and sensitive to the constant attacks on the President and his friends, Tony said:
I'm his friend. And friends don't abandon friends when times are tough. Besides, I'm getting a little tired of Christians who talk on and on about unconditional love but don't seem to have enough love in them to extend it to our President. I'm also shocked by the hatred of many Christians for our President. Bob, I'm sick and tired of Christians who talk about love yet hate so much.
Despite what you may think of President Clinton, you've got to admire Peggy and Tony Campolo for being his friends for better or worse.
Or as I've come to realize, our Lord loves you no more nor less than he loves everybody else.
Check it out (e.g., John 3:16-17).
God grant us true friends.
Thank God we've got at least one in Jesus!
He'd just die for us.
He did.
I like how the apocryphal Wisdom of Jesus ben Sirach described true friendship (see Sirach 6:7-17):
Faithful friends are a sturdy shelter: whoever finds one has found a treasure.
Faithful friends are beyond price; no amount can balance their worth.
Faithful friends are life-saving medicine; and those who fear the Lord will find them.
Those who fear the Lord direct their friendship aright, for as they are, so are their neighbors also.
And then we are warned:
When you gain friends, gain them through testing, and do not trust them hastily.
For there are friends who are such when it suits them, but they will not stand by you in time of trouble.
And there are friends who change into enemies, and tell of the quarrel to your disgrace.
And there are friends who sit at your table, but they will not stand by you in time of trouble.
True friends are with us in all things at all times for better or worse.
Like Jesus!
In "The Vital Life of Friendship" (The Presbyterian Outlook, May 25, 1998), Austin Seminary Professor William Stacy Johnson directed our attention to the friendship of Jonathan and David as a model for us:
One of the most famous friendships in the Bible is that of David and Jonathan ... Jonathan, the son of King Saul, makes a covenant with the young shepherd, David, who has just enjoyed an extraordinary success in slaying the Philistine giant, Goliath. We are told that the "soul of Jonathan was knit to the soul of David." ... The term "soul" is a translation of nephesh, which is perhaps better translated as "vital life." Thus, the life of Jonathan was bound up with the life of David, and Jonathan loved David as he loved his own life.
Dr. Johnson concluded:
You and I have many companions and colleagues, but in a society of busy and highly mobile individuals it is not easy to sustain lifelong bonds of covenant friendship. Why should we desire such a thing? Because our soul, our vital life, may depend on it.
Of course, the best description of true friendship comes from Jesus: "In everything do to others as you would have them do to you" (Matthew 7:12).
And that's why Paul wrote, "We always pray for you, asking that our God will make you worthy of his call ... so that the name of our Lord may be glorified in you, and you in him."
Martin Luther often said, "Good works don't make a person good but a good person does good works!"
John Calvin said God's friends show the signs of their salvation.
Or as I heard a radio evangelist scream late one night as I drove on New Jersey's Route 40 about 25 years ago, "The only gospel that some folks will ever hear or see is the gospel according to you."
True friends.
How does it show?
Well, take a look at the cross for starters.
Anyway, I complained to Eric about my dad's gamesmanship during one particular losing effort. If the whistling and jingling coins while I putted weren't bad enough, the tone was set on the first green when my dad asked, "Why do you putt left-handed?" "Because," I explained in vain, "I can't putt right-handed." "Well, I've got news for you," my dad said under breath just loud enough to embarrass me, "You can't putt left-handed either."
After letting me vent for a few minutes, Eric commented, "You know, Bob, I'd give anything to play one more round with my dad. Enjoy him while you've got him."
Certainly, there are some songs that inspire sobriety. Harry Chapin's "Cat In The Cradle" is especially indicting for parents. Barbara Streisand's duet with Neil Diamond called "You Don't Bring Me Flowers" will do the trick for married couples who take each other for granted. "Give Of Your Best to the Master" can cause a wince or two. And then there's Michael Rutherford's "In The Living Years" which was made famous by Mike and the Mechanics in the late 1980s and early 1990s, which should make any listener stop short and re-examine one's relationship with one's parents.
Eric and Michael have helped me to honor my dad -- to prize his place in my life and enjoy him while I've got him. They have helped me to keep the fifth commandment (Exodus 20:12).
So before it's too late, I'm going to spend more time with him. And maybe I'll be able to avoid those guilt-ridden tears that I've seen streaming down too many sons' faces during funerals. Besides, you can't become an adult until you've come to terms with being a child. So here's what I wrote to my dad for Father's Day:
Dear Dad,
I've always liked reading Oswald Chambers' My Utmost for His Highest which contains devotional essays equaled by few. Aside from the Bible, I've probably spent more time with it than any other book except Tommy Armour's How to Play Your Best Golf All the Time (1953).
Reading Chambers' The Highest Good (1938) not too long ago, I was struck by this line: "A friend is one who makes me do my best."
I guess that makes you my best friend because you insisted I never settle for anything less than God's best for me.
You never bought into the "That'll do" modern mantra of mediocrity. And you never accepted my "But-I-Did-My-Best-Dad" rationalizations after less than sterling efforts. I'll never forget how you often said, "Just think if you woke up from an operation and the doctors said, 'Well, I did my best.' You'd think, 'How about doing your job?' "
You come from the old school of hard work, traditional values, clean play, and fidelity to God, wife, children, and country. And I'm praying, as Leslie's dad often says, "The apple doesn't fall far from the tree."
I hold you responsible for my addiction to golf. I resisted it for many years -- it was the rebellious thing to do! -- but now I realize it's good exercise, fun, and a lot cheaper than a psychiatrist. And as I remember you telling Mom, "I've never seen a man cheat on his wife while playing golf."
Speaking of golf, I am still savoring our last round together. We played well together and whipped 'em! And what you said before we teed off on number 6 will stay with me for the rest of my life. You were talking with the other team about a mutual friend in hospice. "It's probably his last stop," you reported before you counseled, "so enjoy this while you can, fellahs!"
That's why I've rededicated myself to enjoying and being with you and Mom.
So before we're temporarily parted as a prelude to our eternal closeness, there's some unfinished business or dreams or whatever -- a favorite word of yours! -- to fulfill. We've got to play Pebble Beach while you can still -- gulp! -- beat me.
Rounds at Oakmont and a few courses in Scotland wouldn't hurt either.
A friend just sent me the best prayer that he has ever heard: "Lord, please make me the kind of person my dog thinks I am."
Here's my prayer: "Lord, please make me the kind of man my dad knows I can be."
And, by the way, I appreciate the hugs that now punctuate our greetings and goodbyes.
Blessings and Love,
Bobby
While I know my dad is not perfect, he has been God's best for me. He has been a true friend. He has incarnated Paul's encouraging letter to his friends:
We always pray for you, asking that our God will make you worthy of his call and will fulfill by his power every good resolve and work of faith, so that the name of our Lord Jesus may be glorified in you, and you in him, according to the grace of our God and the Lord Jesus Christ.
-- 2 Thessalonians 1:11-12
I know some folks haven't had good relationships with their parents. God knows I'm very sorry for them. But that must not stop them from turning to the perfect parent -- the Lord.
That's why I've shared this letter with you. As Eric said, "Enjoy him while you've got him."
That applies to both fathers.
When best-selling author, television personality, professor, preacher, presidential chum and chaplain, salt of the earth, reflected light, and friend of Jesus, Tony Campolo was at Center (May 31, 1998), I had a chance to ask in the spirit of mutual and now-resurrected friend Dick Lane, "So, Tony, how's the Prez?"
Quick as ever and sensitive to the constant attacks on the President and his friends, Tony said:
I'm his friend. And friends don't abandon friends when times are tough. Besides, I'm getting a little tired of Christians who talk on and on about unconditional love but don't seem to have enough love in them to extend it to our President. I'm also shocked by the hatred of many Christians for our President. Bob, I'm sick and tired of Christians who talk about love yet hate so much.
Despite what you may think of President Clinton, you've got to admire Peggy and Tony Campolo for being his friends for better or worse.
Or as I've come to realize, our Lord loves you no more nor less than he loves everybody else.
Check it out (e.g., John 3:16-17).
God grant us true friends.
Thank God we've got at least one in Jesus!
He'd just die for us.
He did.
I like how the apocryphal Wisdom of Jesus ben Sirach described true friendship (see Sirach 6:7-17):
Faithful friends are a sturdy shelter: whoever finds one has found a treasure.
Faithful friends are beyond price; no amount can balance their worth.
Faithful friends are life-saving medicine; and those who fear the Lord will find them.
Those who fear the Lord direct their friendship aright, for as they are, so are their neighbors also.
And then we are warned:
When you gain friends, gain them through testing, and do not trust them hastily.
For there are friends who are such when it suits them, but they will not stand by you in time of trouble.
And there are friends who change into enemies, and tell of the quarrel to your disgrace.
And there are friends who sit at your table, but they will not stand by you in time of trouble.
True friends are with us in all things at all times for better or worse.
Like Jesus!
In "The Vital Life of Friendship" (The Presbyterian Outlook, May 25, 1998), Austin Seminary Professor William Stacy Johnson directed our attention to the friendship of Jonathan and David as a model for us:
One of the most famous friendships in the Bible is that of David and Jonathan ... Jonathan, the son of King Saul, makes a covenant with the young shepherd, David, who has just enjoyed an extraordinary success in slaying the Philistine giant, Goliath. We are told that the "soul of Jonathan was knit to the soul of David." ... The term "soul" is a translation of nephesh, which is perhaps better translated as "vital life." Thus, the life of Jonathan was bound up with the life of David, and Jonathan loved David as he loved his own life.
Dr. Johnson concluded:
You and I have many companions and colleagues, but in a society of busy and highly mobile individuals it is not easy to sustain lifelong bonds of covenant friendship. Why should we desire such a thing? Because our soul, our vital life, may depend on it.
Of course, the best description of true friendship comes from Jesus: "In everything do to others as you would have them do to you" (Matthew 7:12).
And that's why Paul wrote, "We always pray for you, asking that our God will make you worthy of his call ... so that the name of our Lord may be glorified in you, and you in him."
Martin Luther often said, "Good works don't make a person good but a good person does good works!"
John Calvin said God's friends show the signs of their salvation.
Or as I heard a radio evangelist scream late one night as I drove on New Jersey's Route 40 about 25 years ago, "The only gospel that some folks will ever hear or see is the gospel according to you."
True friends.
How does it show?
Well, take a look at the cross for starters.
